I think the important thing is not to look to far ahead. Forever is a tough word. I said to myself I can have a drink at Easter/Christmas, secretly hoping this attempt would stick. As it is I have had many many tests and have managed to stay sober. This attempt feels different. However, sobriety is fragile and I know I could slip.
For me I decided my DC and DH deserved better. To begin, I was quite selfish and put myself first, of course I looked after DC/DH went to work but, I just prioritised staying sober each day.
In the first couple of weeks, I listened to quit lit continuously. I also treated myself to nice bath/shower gel and used it every night. I ate whatever I wanted in the evening to replace the alcohol I would normally drink. I didn't and still don't use af drinks I know some do but it didn't feel right to me. I started on lots of vitamins as recommended by Craig Beck. I liked the idea of supporting my poor body. I also didn't really socialise in the first month or so.
My witching hour is when I am prepping the evening meal, to overcome, this I prepped in advance or cooked things that could go straight in the oven. If I felt particularly twitchy I would get out for a walk with my audiobook, head into a cafe and reward myself with a large mocha.
Really important to get up every day and get dressed. I think the depressive element of alcohol abuse takes a while to go, so I felt it important to get up every day, not lay around feeling sorry for myself. I had a real loathing for myself but could not let them undermine my attempts. It was not easy and it was a struggle probably for the first month. But, it does get easier and when I saw the numerous benefits, I just had to keep pushing through.
I felt I created this mess so I alone had to deal with it. I initially counted days then stopped and just added them up now and again. I did eventually tell people I had stopped drinking, this felt really empowering and I felt accountable.
I have eased back on the chocolate and because I feel so amazing I have started to really care for my skin and hair, I ensure I drink about 2 litres of water. My sleep is amazing and I am so happy to wake up every day hangover free.
I have lost alot of weight so have got myself some lovely clothes. I feel great. I googled sober celebrities and have found that really empowering, my favourite being Tom Hardy 😍. I am not even tempted to drink, I have had some tough times where I have really had to get my head down and get through it.
I feel calm my anxiety has gone, I am so patient and tolerate now. I am no longer fighting with myself or abusing my body. I actually really like myself now. This is what keeps me sober. I cannot ever drink again.
In the initial days I did nap in the day when I wasn't working and that helped. It took about 3 weeks for my sleep to settle. Highly recommend magnesium spray that I spray on my shoulders and rub in. You do need to bee kind to yourself, if you find (as I did) yourself looking in the mirror and only seeing the bad in you, please reframe this and remind yourself what you are doing for yourself and those you love.
If I can do this anyone can. I have made it sound easy, it really was not. I had wobbles and hated myself, got angry when I went to a pub with DH etc. I am now at a point where it feels easier. Google some celebs and read their stories, we are all the same. We all need to know this.
Sorry it is so long, this is a short version 😁.