Anyone else in Day 1 today

[enoughisenough100]

So after so many attempts of failing, I'm really hoping to succeed this time. Is anyone on day 1. I go through other posts nd read how well people are doing, but just can't seem to get past the first few days. The house is hectic nd I feel like by 5 o clock, I deserve to be opening a bottle of wine. I know I shouldn't nd would be feel so much better the next day if I can stop drinking. Just can't seem to crack it. Any tips on audio books that really worked? Other ideas? I think I've tried so many times I need to do something different. I know the first few weeks are going to b tough, any vitamins etc to give a boost. Any advice ? Help !!!

Wow that's so good. I know what you mean the automatic yes can you grab me wine/spirit etc the problem with my house is that DH invests in wine and has a lot delivered every so often kept in a wine fridge. Once he said he will put a lock on it as I was taking them out and drinking them willy nilly not appreciating it etc because of course he is the wine expert. Few months ago we went to wine tasting with his ex colleague and friend and I didn't spit out any of the goddamn wines and got battered. And then felt like shit. And then the circle keeps going around as you say back to day 1 it's better we don't beat ourselves up about not being able to moderate etc
Also I have decided I'm done doing everything for the family every day, cooking cleaning breaking up fights while DH plays games chills makes himself food etc so I'm also going to head out by myself too but don't know where? Shopping is my thing but also need to not over spend (addiction and that )...and if I got to nice beauty spot I will definitely feel guilty my kids aren't with me...

Oh crikey, I couldn't have wine in the fridge. It'd be gone.
I know what you mean about feeling guilty but it sounds like you need some time on your own. I'm sure you do everything for your family, so it's not wrong to have some time to yourself. Maybe just go for the morning or the afternoon. That's not too long and if you walk, you'll feel great and energised when you get home. You could even make it a regular habit.
Guilt is a terrible feeling though. Us mothers have it no matter what. I feel guilty leaving my dog, but I can't stay in again.

Morning, hope we're all OK. Another great sleep for me and I'm up and raring to go.
Strange thought last night as I got in bed. Well, not that strange, but more of an epiphany.
I thought if you'd drank today ( and that would have been 2 bottles/ 5 cigs), you wouldn't be going to bed fresh. You'd have ;

1. probably passed out about 7pm, then woke not knowing what time / day it was.
2. been fretting over who you text, and what you said
3. your head would be pounding, and no amount of diet coke would quench your thirst
4. you'd be starved, and would probably eat a load of rubbish, thereby sabotaging your diet
5. you'd be at least £30 down.

I could go on, but that's not a pretty picture. Today would also be a write - off, filled with eating rubbish and feeling guilty cos I cba walking the dog.
Contrast today. My diet is going great, my skin looks lovely, my eyes are shining and mostly, I feel happy and positive.
I'm going to walk my dog, go on a long walk myself. I've planned my menu and this afternoon, I'll watch the tennis with some diet coke and a little chocolate.

Sorry for the longggg post, just wanted to share.

Hi @Amdone123 that's a great list it was so good to read and motivated me. Just came back from a random street party but there wasn't a drink in sight at the table and we didn't need it! I'm feeling really lethargic today though...feeling bit sad but might be the new meds I'm taking too coupled with major PMS. Will eat chocolate.lol

Aaahh, pmt is the worst. Have a rest now with your chocolate. 😀

Okay so sorry I didn't post in a couple of nights, mainly because I gave in and had wine! I actually felt guilty so couldn't post! We went for lunch too today and i had one, I just spiralled downhill but never brought home a bottle today and counting tomorrow as day one! I see how good ye are doing here, trust me, u don't want to even chance one drink coz it dosent stop at that (for me anyway) . I was doing so well and really notice the difference in my mood etc the last couple of days. I hope I can start fresh and keep going! I think the longer u go without, the more determined u get! Please share again how well ye are feeling and hopefully that will keep me going in the right road! I feel yuck with the last 2 days!! Well done ye x

@enoughisenough100 , hi there. Awh, bless you. You don't have to apologise. You've just had a blip, that's all. It's not easy and don't forget how well you've done up until this point.
It doesn't matter if you caved, the main thing is you've learned something from it. I think that's important. And thank you for reminding me. I've had a wobbly afternoon and nearly went and bought it, but I resisted ( mainly cos I couldn't be bothered), and I know from what you've posted, that it's not worth it.
Get back on it tomorrow. Start afresh. And don't speak negatively to yourself because I know you wouldn't speak like that to me, had I caved.
We can do it ! 💪

Hey @enoughisenough100 I hear you and have been there enough times. But well done for posting about it at least instead of hiding it? I'm day 34/35 and honestly I'm so stressed etc but I did not drink and feel so good. If you just do the whole I won't drink today thing so you were out and when you look at the menu just go straight for the alcohol free options first and your brain might be like.oh I'll give that a try but I know how tempting it is to have wine (that was my evil poison). Today my dh sat beside me drinking and I was a bit like meh and made a comment but I didn't WANT it and the feelings that are associated with it. As you say downward spiral end up self loathing etc don't beat yourself up. Start from.tomorriw. and well done @Amdone123 for resisting and like you said you couldn't be bothered is brilliant there were times I would literally even if my eyes were closing still want more of to get more and where would I get more I even tried to Uber eats alcohol (before they did actually do Ubereats alcohol which I think they should ban) I used to only order take outs from places that served alcohol if I had none in the house crazy hey how our minds work? I've been drinking Af beers which help and I'm going to try for Gordon's 0% one day. Stay strong

@Namechanged12344 , thanks and you're doing fab. 👏
A while back on here, there was a thread about af drinks. Some brilliant suggestions.
I like an af beer, must get some in. And tesco af gin n tonics are great.
@enoughisenough100 , don't forget, tomorrow is a new day.

Hey, thanks for not making me feeling too bad! I'm so determined now, I'm not going to crack again. Hope I gave ye a reminder with how well ye are doing and how awful it is if u give in, coz believe me, just incase ye forgot its not worth it! Keep going ye are doing amazing xx

Hi all. Good to be here. Amdone123 came and rescued me from a fairly quiet thread .. I am grateful.

I am 7weeks 2 days AF today. I have been drinking 35cl bottles of vodka pretty much every day for years. When guilt got to me I cut down to a bottle of wine.. plus anything else I could find. I would like to think it's only been a couple of years.. but in reality it's about 8 years.

I work full time in a fairly senior role. One where drinking after work is a culture but where drinking on duty is sackable. I have still had alcohol in from the night before on numerous occasions.
.. my husband is a chronic, 30 year, full on -in-denial alcoholic. I had had probably had 3 drinks in my life up until meeting him at 44... I took it up with gusto. Two glasses of wine I would be hammered.. now I can do a litre of vodka over 2 days if I start early enough.

I don't drink 'out'. I drive and live rurally. I like to drink at home so I can just fall into bed. .. I am really lazy. I have given up pretty much everything in favour of drink. Last child leaving for Uni last year really ramped it up. I didn't have to hide it anymore. (Not that he was fooled for a moment) ..

I came in this topic board a couple of months ago and saw mention of 'Alcohol Explained' . I am very analytical. I deal with 'evidence' all day at work. I like facts. Long story short - something clicked. I realised that the drug that was meant to chill me out was the actual thing causing the anxiety - and I was actually PAYING to make myself more anxious everyday. I loved the lack of evangelism . Just the facts about a depressant anaesthesia and poison dressed up to be an essential to all social occasions.. drink or don't drink.. these are the facts. The rest is up to you...

I haven't had another drink. It's very early days .. 7 weeks 2 days but feel blessed to have found something that has (so far) worked for me.

Oh sorry just wanted to add.. I have read numerous 'quit' books and signed up to various programs. Allan Carr /Annie Grace/AA etc but none lasted longer than a week/ten days. This one has worked for me.. but I think it's very subjective. Depends how you are wired !

@Eddiesferret , morning ( again !). I'm so glad you've popped on here because it sounds like you are smashing this. I love the sound of that book. I have heard of it before, I don't know why I've always been somewhat averse to reading quit lit. I'm definitely going to try it.
7 weeks, 2 days, is really good so well done, again !
Morning @enoughisenough100 , @Namechanged12344 .
Well, another good night's sleep for me. I won't lie, yesterday was tough. The sun was shining in the afternoon and I love nothing more than sitting in the garden and reading and you know what. I didn't want to go n sit in the garden at first as I didn't have any alcohol, til I gave my head a wobble and realised how bloody stupid that sounded. I had a soft drink, read my book and topped up my tan. It was a lovely afternoon. Why I think I need alcohol in my life, I do not know. Addiction I suppose ( though I'm thinking that book may well explain that !)
Last day of my holiday today so I'm going to continue being productive, reflective, healthy and sober.

@Eddiesferret , yes, I know what you mean. Different courses etc. Annie Grace 'worked' for me, in that, I loved doing it for 30 days, but limped along after that on my own, I think, for another 10 days.
Lots of things work for me ( to an extent ) but as I've never read a quit lit book, that's next.

Hi @Eddiesferret well done for 7 weeks 2 days ! Im only day 34 but feeling bloody good about things this time!
We are so lucky with the amount of support we get these days.
I was also averse to reading any quit lit @Amdone123 literally I have so many on my Kindle but the one that resonated most with me was the sober diaries by Clare pooley. I even got a copy for my neighbor who's struggling ! That changed my view point. I have Annie grace book and alcohol explained and alcohol lied to me and Mrs d goes without but haven't read any of those. But I do like humour in it too. I also struggled with the sun and especially as DH drinking beside me but for once I did feel respected by him, my attitude anger body everything changes when I drink. I'm rude aggressive can't wait for kids to go to bed so I can drink etc etc I'm a better person all over and I know it's daunting for the rest of my life but for now I won't drink today. Hope you are ok @enoughisenough100 xx

@Namechanged12344 , I really resonate with you saying you're a better person without it. I was in denial, have been, really, saying I'm not a bad drunk - I'm funny, sociable etc when drunk, but the day after, I'm terrible. Really snappy, impatient / hangry etc. So I must remember that, because the morning after the night before is still part of it.
I'm a better person without it.

Sundays are a bad day for me, alcohol wise. I don't know why. Maybe I find them boring, so drink / drank to alleviate the boredom.
When I was teaching, I would often drink on a Sunday, when really I should have been getting ready for work. I was always hungover on a Monday and those days were painful. Yet I never learnt ( ironic ).
There's lots I can do today when I think about it. I'm going to walk my dog, then clean the house. The kitchen, especially. I like doing that !
I only work 7 hours a week but this week I'm in everyday ( cleaner), so that will help me stay af. I hope. Sometimes I feel so happy / satisfied after cleaning, I want to drink. Reward I guess.

Welcome @Eddiesferret and well done on 7 weeks 2 days that's amazing. U must feel great! Well I'm back to day one, but giving this my best shot this time! The other evening got to me, car wouldnt start after work nd wen I finally got home kids were constantly fighting with each other , it was mayhem! I gave in and drank ! ! Dh even commented how good my form was wen I wasn't drinking, it really is not worth it!

Yep, I have fallen. In spectacular fashion, actually. 2 x bottles of really good champagne. Oops.
I hope to join you all again tomorrow. X

Hello newbie here, this thread seems great.
day one again for me, I did 5 weeks a while back and felt amazing. Started again and have kept drinking to weekends only but had an almighty binge this weekend and realise it has to be nothing at all for me.
I love The Sober Diaries and have just downloaded Allen Carr stop drinking for women. Has anyone found that helpful? Planning to have a few hours listening today and start my reset 😊

@TheFuckingDogs , morning and welcome. I'm probably similar to you. I have af periods and do feel great - energy, lose weight, skin looks good, etc, then I cave.
I did 7 days af til yesterday. When I woke up yesterday, the first thing I thought of was alcohol. Not wanting a drink, just wondering if I would or not. I cleaned the house from top to bottom and knew then I would. Once the idea is in my head, I find it very difficult to ignore it.
Anyway, I'm in work all week so I'm going to concentrate on the next 5 days. I can do that.
I'm best taking it in short spurts.
Never read any quit lit, but I really need to start.

@TheFuckingDogs , can I ask why you think you cave ? Sometimes I think it's boredom, but I do lead a busy ish life - I'm active, I read, and I'm content, so it's not depresion. I do sometimes feel anxious. My ds went on holiday this morning with my granddaughter and I was worrying about that.
Or is it just habit ?

Anyway, I'm not beating myself up, or being negative to myself because I wouldn't do that to anyone else.
At least, today I won't drink 😒

@Amdone123 that sounds very similar. Vigorous cleaning often seems to be followed by me choosing to drink.

I think for me it’s also boredom despite having a busy life. That default thing of drinking whenever I have a tiny chunk of downtime.
I have been trying to reflect on it and I definitely drink out of a slight social anxiety but obviously the alcohol makes the anxiety so much worse.
I would also say I’m content. I’m also a happy drunk, nothing bad particularly happens when I drink but the anxiety/poor sleep/ feeling ill is absolutely crippling and it’s all caused by that one thing - alcohol.

I totally agree about being kind to ourselves today. I’m squeezing in a quick nap now!

@Amdone123 hi hope you are ok today. I would have loved some champagne I have some from my birthday I think (oh no drank that and all! Just like most of the stuff in my house but have resisted for 35 days now ) But I bought nosecco instead. There's a poster on the freedoms thread that is a year sober tomorrow and she gives amazing tips in a post she just posted go check it out. Also you said at the end of one of your last posts why haven't you read any quit lit just wondering there's so much out there ! If you want to start somewhere humourous not too technical etc try sober diaries or unexpected joys of being sober?

@TheFuckingDogs also used to drink out of boredoms mainly but also to deal with stress and anxiety and every situation to be honest it was all am excuse to drink tbh. Other people do use different coping strategies mine was drink. I got a knitting kit one of those magazines to help the boredom and something to do with my hands at the start. I never want to go back to a day 1 so have that in my mind too to keep going. Over a month sober and it feels fab ,I've done it before for 10.months but fell off and it was a slippery slope. The hardest was those first few days. You can do it!