"YES it is SO worth it, YES it gets easier and YES we thought it was impossible as well - its not 😊" A thread for those embracing an alcohol free existence.

[Drybird2020]

Thanks to @Ravenswick for the quote in the title 😊. We are back for thread 5, and if you are just joining us, or thinking about it, you might want to have a read through its predecessors, which are full of useful tips, sound advice, stories and cautionary tales. You will absolutely, definitely find much that resonates, and talking regularly on here is a great way to stay sane and keep yourself accountable.

Thread 1
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/3781133-Anyone-else-stopping-completely-in-2020

Thread 2
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/3810419-Still-stopped-in-2020-a-thread-for-anyone-abstaining-from-alcohol

Thread 3 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/3910349-Staying-Stopped-Alcohol-Free-permanently

Thread 4
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/3965594-Forever-Free-a-life-without-booze-2020-onwards

The only "rules" are that you are committing to an alcohol free life, and that you have stopped drinking before you begin to post.

If you've been here for a while, you know what to do. Keep doing it! 😊

I had NO IDEA what ‘rooting’ meant in Australia!! Whoops! Thanks for that education @SparklingLime!
I’m good thanks @ElsaCragg. Hope your blues are passing Breathmiller ...I’d best get back to work...

Their use of ‘spunky’ threw me, @iamyourequal, as in “He’s so spunky!” (hot). I was... 🤨

Thanks everyone. Blues diminished with a quiet afternoon with my family watching a movie - Judy, if anyone hasn't seen it, I really enjoyed it. I kind of failed on the not food thing but have had a good snacky time curled up on the sofa. All good.

"He's a spunk!" was always good for a giggle when neighbours first came over here.

I also looked at Ozzie dh when he first talked about wearing 'thongs' . "You wear WHAT now?"

Hello everyone It's been a while since I've checked in but I've been lurking in the background and it's nice to see the support is thriving.

I have to admit this week has been the toughest for me since the start of lockdown and for the first time in a long time I've had cravings for some relief from it all, knowing that alcohol would dispense that really quickly. I'm hanging on in there though and I know it will pass - I even remembered the adage about cleaning the bathroom so that killed some time last night!

It's really nice to see some old timers from the earlier threads as well, @SparklingLime, @SophocIestheFox, @elsacragg Thanks for keeping it going @Drybird2020.

I like that phrase 'blues diminished' @Breathmiller. I'm going to try and make it a positive weekend and have small goals along the way to diminish by own blues.

It’s great to hear from you, @Ulysses. Someone who actually cleans the bathroom instead of giving in to a craving has my lifelong respect! I hope today is a little better for you. I need some small goals too. What are yours?

Hi ulysses 👋🏻 Sorry it’s tough this week, but congrats on the clean bathroom!

I’m under the weather at the mo, so struggling with goals...

Hi @Ulysses . How's your day going?

Hi @Ulysses nice to see you!

Lads, I had friends over for dinner. And they liked it. And there was pudding. And there was no alcohol. I just sent this to my friend:

"Thanks for coming over. Every time we have a lovely evening like this and I'm sober I genuinely feel like everything's going to be ok ❤️"

Keep on keeping on everyone!

Hope you are feeling better @Ulysses and @Breathmiller.

@Hangingover, check you out! Fab post - good food with friends, just the best, that's put a smile on my face as well

Have a good weekend chaps, and stick with us - all for one and one for all!

Thanks all for the well wishes, you are a smashing bunch

I a m feeling more settled now and trying to eek the best out of the weekend. My small goals were - 15 minutes of yoga - cleaning the windows (our window cleaner hasn't been since May!) - plus I managed to go for a 5K run at the gym, have a bath and empty my washing basket. I also ended up speaking to a couple of my neighbours for the first time in a few weeks and we've all been feeling anxious too this week and it's as if there's been this collective dismay at the state of things, but it's been cathartic to talk about it.

I'm so glad I didn't succumb to drink despite feeling the weight of the world at the time. I have got things to look forward, meeting an old friend tomorrow who I haven't seen in a long time, time off over the next couple of weeks (not consecutively unfortunately but a much needed break from work) and we've sorted out a mini break in they Highlands so I can escape the house for a bit.

I really like that message @Hangingover - Everything will be okay. I've been through enough to know it's true and being able to absorb it and find comfort from it.

Happy weekend everyone.

Well done ulysses a very productive day.

I am laid up with my back again after tweaking it again yesterday. But it gave me the chance to read a book. A biography about Judy Garland. Not the cheeriest but boy it's a lesson on not getting addicted to anything.

Just checking in. Glad you had a lovely time with friends @Hangingover!

Well done on the run and the small goals @Ulysses!

I’m struggling a bit (just work, kids, life) but NOT struggling with alcohol for which I am sober.

Two more nights then it has been SIX FUCKING MONTHS. SIX MONTHS!!!

Watch this space as I’ll be patting myself on the back aplenty on Monday🤩😂

BunniesBunniesBunnies that is so unbelievably awesome, I'll have my party poppers ready and waiting!

I feel awful today because I got my period (which I never get (pill). Ever) but the world and his dog has come up to windsurf today including the shag twin (who DP is now apparently sharing a campsite with when they all go on their trip next week - wtf?! Why must my past shags haunt me in this way) so anyway must join in (e.g probably brain myself falling in). Will avoid post surf beers like the plague.

Sort of feel the urge to put something nice on actually, and a bit of make-up, in a post-conquest act of keeping up appearances which is completely mad as a) DP is right here and b) I did not shag shag-twin. Shag twin does not even know who I am. Hey ho. Have a good day UK pals, when you all wake up.

Update...have put on MAKE UP and PERFUME to go to the beach. Apparently my subconscious believes shag-twin may happen to walk past while facetiming his brother and he'll catch a glimps of me in the background and go, "oh that girl with the on point eyeliner looks exactly like someone I had a two night stand with halfway across the planet SIX YEARS AGO. Man, she looks like she's doing well!".

I think I need a lie down.

Am bloody lucky DP finds all of this hilarious rather than questioning my sanity.

hangingover i get that. I like to think when i meet an ex or someone related to the past that I like to have my 'cocktail dress' on. Now i have never been a cocktail dress kind of gal but it's a concept .
Can you put a cocktail dress on to go to the beach? Too much?

I can mooooove!! Managed yoga this morning and a day of getting my house in order is ahead because it has been driving me mad.

I was just saying to dh this morning that I need to stay vigilant. He asked if I will stop counting at some point. But I realised that last week I have really noticed milestones. 60 days mid week, 2 months on Friday then 9 weeks last night. Its not that I fancy a drink, or am craving a drink, its more I feel that I'm so nonchalant about it that I could potentially slip into feeling that "this is so easy, I have no problem, I could have one enjoyable drink if I wanted"
So, enjoying all the support here and the wee happy dance inside I get when I pop a star on my phone calendar and when I tick off another milestone. I am reminding myself that the reason I feel so good is because I'm NOT drinking! And I want that to stay.

Constant vigilance! as Mad Eye Moody would say

Actually shag-twin came over while I was laying on the grass in my bathing suit (win) and sunglasses (double win) laughing with my friend and he greeted DP v. enthusiastically (wtf are they friends now or something -does shag twin in fact have a mancrush on DP?!) and DP have me a sort of side-eye look which said "are you flexing?" and I gave one back which said "how dare you acuse me of flexing". Is all ridiculous anyway as IT'S NOT EVEN THE SAME GUY 😂

DP and me just got back from the pub and remarked how different it is without alcohol...you go there, see your friend, eat your food, then go. But there's something about booze which means "pub" is your whole evening automatically accounted for. Like, you'd never stay in a coffee shop for 6 hours! unless you're stealing wifi

I'm pretty confident @Hangingover that the message will have flown round the world straight from shag twin that there is a hot sober gal on a beach in bathing suit and shades with her hot DP...meanwhile shag cries sadly in his dark northern hemisphere bed-sit, all alone... be a love and write the screenplay will you?

100 days for me today and thinking exactly what you said @Breathmiller, that CONSTANT VIGILANCE will now be my watch-words 'cos I am terrified of slipping back!

Woops, can’t write! Meant to say “for which I am grateful” not sober!

@Hangingover, make up and perfume??? What are these foreign objects you speak of??? (May have let myself go slightly during lockdown😂)

I really like this time of year normally, and went for a long long walk with my brother this morning, beautiful sunshine, gorgeous leaves and not yet clocks-go-back-darkness slug. But I’ve been finding it quite tricky and so is pretty much everyone I know...I think the knowledge mad 2020 not quite done yet. So keep on keeping on @Ulysses and congrats @Ravenswick and @BunniesBunniesBunnies

I’m going to make a list of small distractions too. Number one rewatching Prime Suspect on the delight that is BritBox. (Number two is a 5k but I’ll save that til tomorrow)

Hello everyone, I'm over on the day 1 thread too but thought I'd drop in and say hi since we're all on the same team.

I'm on day 48, said initially I'd do 90 but I already know going back to it will mean a slippery slope to 5+ days drinking a week (only cos I'm denying myself the other 1 or 2) and hangovers every Sat and sun (and maybe fri and Mon and Thurs for good measure!) so we'll see. I think I didn't join this thread initially as I'm not quite there with committing to an alcohol free life, and I definitely wasn't on day 1, but who knows.

It's been an eye opener that's for sure, and its the longest I've been without in my adult life, first trimester of pregnancy excluded.

6 months today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I couldn’t have done it without you guys. I am so so so so grateful to be where I am today. Thanks all!

Congratulations @BunniesBunniesBunnies, that's awesome!

Thank you! I really can’t quite believe it. I never thought I could do this, and even if I did, I thought it would be miserable.

It’s not, it’s awesome! I’m literally the same person I was before, just better🤩🤩🤩

I still have my shit list and my bad days, but I’m okay with that. I’m kind of okay with ME, which I really wasn’t 6 months ago.

Happy days!

Yay!!!! Cingratylations bunnies 6 months is amazing! And so good to hear how good it makes you feel.

Welcome @writingsonthewall 48 days is great. I've been where you are before, doing really well but not quite ready to commit to forever because i found that too scary a thought. But actually, now I've made that commitment, i bizarrely find it much easier. There's no conversation about when i go back, how much do i drink when i go back, will i be able to moderate when i go back? None of that conversation battling on inside my head anymore. It's very freeing.

Well done @BunniesBunniesBunnies @Ravenswick! I've watched this thread since briefly posting on the last one and just popping on to say I've reached 100 days today and I feel so much more healthy and 'present' in family life.
Can't believe it and hope I can keep going. 6 months is my next goal- though I'm trying not to think of it like a goal- more just like focusing on looking after myself and body over time.
My brain seems almost rewired at the moment so that when I look at threads where drinking is mentioned elsewhere on Mumsnet I just think 'Why'?