This is it, my day 1

[Stopthisshit]

I drink too much
I need to stop
This is my day 1
Join me

Thanks ElsaCragg. My plan at the moment is to do Dry-January (I have never tried that before). I am talking my DH into this too. I want him to read the literature so he realises we are both on the downward slope of dependency. I think he thinks that because we are rarely ‘drunk’ it’s not all that harmful. I read enough in my dry stint in October to know it is. Please post any further tips or observations from your experience you feel happy to share, it’s very useful hearing about others’ success, and journeys getting there.

Hi there iamyourequal, I would suggest reading (or re-reading) the Allen Carr book in the time you have before starting Dry January; it may help to get you in the right frame of mind beforehand.

One other thing I use is a free app called Daylio. It's a mood tracker, but you can use it to make notes and count non-drinking days. I've found it very helpful in keeping me focussed and mindful.

Thanks Elsa. I will definitely get the Allen Carr book. I already have a drinks app that I can log moods onto (sounds like your app in reverse). It’s doing me as much good as my Fitbit for healthy living this month (nada!) but I guess it’s useful to be keeping a log to prove why I need to quit /cut right back. How is everyone else doing?

How is everyone feeling this morning?

I have a busy weekend ahead, doing christmassy stuff. I know if I was hungover today, that would be a day wasted. Even at this time of year, I like to have some routine, I find that keeps me focussed, so will be catching up on housework, wrapping presents and doing a few errands. Carol service tomorrow and Christmas baking.

Day 59 here. I think everyone is now used to me having soft drinks in the pub, surprisingly no-one has urged me to have a 'proper' drink in all that time. And I don't find being around alcohol drinking a temptation, despite the amount and regularity of my drinking in the past. Another surprising thing. I suppose that means some of my fears about giving up were untrue.

My top tip - definitely reflect on your reasons and fears about drinking alcohol and giving it up. Don't be afraid to examine your feelings and emotions. The Annie Grace 30 day experiment (free online) has been very worthwhile.

Merry (and dare I say) Sober Christmas everyone .

Day 1 for me

Had a bad night last night - too often I have that one drink that tips me over the edge. Am so ashamed of shouting at my children, embarrassing and disappointing DH and myself, not remembering what happened etc.

I was diagnosed with non alcoholic fatty liver disease a couple of years ago and remember thinking 'why not alcoholic, I've told docs honestly at health reviews how much I drink'

I would like to moderate but just don't know if I can. Have ordered the sober diaries book and told a close friend this morning that I drink too much so hoping that's a start

Well done everyone on your sobriety - whether it's a day or months or years

@jackstini, don't be hard on yourself, be thankful that you have decided to turn things around.

I've found it easier to give up than cut down, although I have had several false starts along the way and I know I cannot be complacent.

There's loads of online help and support out there; blogs, books, websites, lots of helpful suggestions on this thread, no need to try to go it alone.

Good luck on your sober journey.

I'm having my last drink on NYE. I'm staying in and having a bottle of champagne. I look and feel like shit and it's time to make some big changes. Good luck to everyone.

Thanks @ElsaCragg
I think the support on here will definitely help

It's frightening how many posts I am reading that I could have written.

Good luck everyone

@Patsypie and @jackstini all are welcome; keep checking in and reading the thread, even if you don't post often. I've found everyone who posts on here really helpful and totally non-judgmental .

In the meantime, some reading around the subject may help you to get into the right mindset. Lots of recommendations above, but Allen Carr is particularly good, I've found.

Hello, please can I join?

I don't drink that much at all, but spend far too much time holding myself back, and worrying about it. I have no off switch, so on the odd occasion I DO let myself go (once a year, max) I get absolutely wasted.

This happened ten days ago and while I didn't do anything bad (I was out with good friends and we were all drunk together), I had a horrific hangover the next day - being sick so much, I thought I would die. Pathetic.

I've decided it would be so much easier just to give up. I spend so much energy stopping myself drinking - if I just didn't drink at all, I think it would be easier.

Today's day 10 off the booze. I am not sure if I totally want to quit, as I am a really moderate drinker most of the time (average maybe three drinks a week). And I quite enjoy my gin and tonic here, glass of wine there style of drinking.

It's just the annual or even biannual mental night that I hate. But I also get hangovers from just two drinks nowadays, so think that giving up totally would be good.

We'll see - I might drink over Christmas and then do dry Jan and go from there. But I would like to join and am halfway through the Jason Vale book which is helping brainwash me.

I mainly want to stop feeling tired and get that amazing non-drinking energy. I hope you don't mind if I join!

Hello Growingboys, 10 days is awesome, are you feeling any benefits yet?

Just to wake up every day in a positive frame of mind, without any guilt from the night before is the best feeling.

The Jason Vale book is good. Best of luck.

Thank you @ElsaCragg - the mornings are the BEST!

We had friends to lunch yesterday - hard drinking friends who come to our house once a year (we usually see them in the pub) and they stayed from 2pm til 9pm. I drank fizzy elderflower - they didn't realise I wasn't drinking as I put it in a wine glass, and my god I was happy waking up clear headed this morning!

Christmas night be tricky as my family are hardcore drinkers. But I might give it a go and see how I get on. I have a DD with SEN which makes life hard work - all the more reason to quit. If I drink over Xmas I'm definitely doing dry Jan.

Ordered the Sober Diaries last night too after reading about it on this thread. Those books aren't much use to me though as I am such a moderate drinker nearly all the time that their stories of being drunk in the gutter don't really resonate.

But like you say, it's the feeling much better in the mornings that I'm doing it for. I've had loads of colds this winter, and think quitting booze would be a massive thing I could do for my health. I work full time and have three DC, one with SEN, so my life is madly busy.

My biggest problem is work. I love work and have a great job, but there's a real drinking culture there. My boss gets annoyed that I don't keep up with her in terms of drinking (we are both late 40s while everyone else is 30s). But that is a bridge I shall cross next year...

Love reading how everyone on this thread is doing - I've been lurking for ten days now - and so impressed by everyone's dedication and honesty about their struggles.

@Growingboys, being in control of your drinking around others who are drinking is a powerful feeling.

Once everyone else has had their first drink, they probably won't care what you are having. I drink tonic water, ice and lemon, nobody questions that.

And any negative comments from colleagues, friends or family who question your lack of drinking say more about them than you.

Doing Dry January is a great plan.

Hello
I’m new here.
I need to stop drinking and I need some help. Like many, I’ve had very many goes at moderation and it goes ok for a little while and then it really doesn’t.
Another night of too much tonight, after resolutions not to. I was a worse friend, worse wife and worse mum because of it.
I’d would love a buddy - does anyone want to join me in making Christmas Eve day 1?

@Ontheshingle, welcome to the thread, and good luck with your Day 1.

I'm hoping others will be along soon with their advice.

In the meantime, make sure you have non-alcoholic drinks in the house and be kind to yourself.

Do you have any of the books mentioned on the thread? Allen Carr or Jason Vale? If not, you could sign up right now for free online support with the Annie Grace 30 day experiment.

Hope that helps you tackle the next day or so. Best wishes.

Thanks Elsacragg.
I am an old timer at day 1. I’ve managed several months AF a few times but always started again, and many many weeks here and there before I decide I can be moderate etc etc. We had a party last night, I didn’t want to drink and ended up drinking and I’m fed up of wasting days feeling a bit hungover. I’m hoping that a community might help me quit. Today should be OK but Xmas day will be with my family and very boozy. I’m starting to psyche myself up for it but I could really use some help!
PS I’ve gone Jason vale and that was good - didn’t drink for a few months. But not Allen Carr- maybe I should get it on my final shopping trip today. Thanks for the tip.

I just wanted to say well done to everyone who is doing this, particularly now, when the pressure to drink is probably greater than it is at any other time of the year. This will be my first af Xmas (I quit in January), but I am now at the stage where I don’t get cravings and I have a very clear idea of how I would feel if I did drink. Someone on another thread said that not drinking is a super power, and I really agree with that. I definitely don’t want to sound smug or holier than thou, but I know that if I don’t drink I will (a) get done everything that I need to do with less stress (b) sleep much better and wake up on Xmas day feeling refreshed (c) be properly present when my kids open their gifts, and I’m really looking forward to that because this is probably the last Xmas that we will have a Father Christmas believer in the house (d) look a hundred times better come 2020 and (e) save all those empty calories for delicious food! I don’t want to say too much but I will add that this Xmas is turning out to be really awful because a family member was just diagnosed with a terminal illness and hasn’t long to live, so all plans have been cancelled and it has been tough, but at no point would alcohol have made any of that any easier. It would have made it so, so much harder. The toll on my sleep, anxiety, and self respect is not worth the 20 minute buzz I used to get from the first drink or two and then spend the rest of the evening chasing.

Anyway, enough from me. Just think, if you do decide to go AF for Christmas you will be getting a huge jump on everyone who comes to the same realisation on the morning of January 1!

@Ontheshingle, best of luck with your latest attempt. The Jason Vale book has a very similar message and style to Allen Carr, but I think Jason's book is an easier read.

Your post is full of wise words and food for thought @StandUpStraight. And to continue to forego alcohol under such difficult circumstances is a real superpower. Best wishes.

Everything you see rings true standupstraight - thanks for the timely reminder. It is so nice to wake up without trace of a hangover on Xmas morning and I’m looking forward to that.
Anyone want to share handholds through Xmas day? We’ll arrive at my parents’ and I’ll have a glass of champagne thrust in my hand - champagne always my worst weakness. I know I’ll be fine if I get through that first bit and enjoy the rest of the day so much more.

And I’m going to believe this is my last not latest attempt. I am fed up with this boring destructive cycle.

@Ontheshingle, fortunately we're hosting Christmas Day at ours, I know I will find that so much easier.

I'll be around tomorrow, from time to time. If you do start to waver, remember you have a super power!

And think about those lovely clear-headed mornings.

I’ll try to check in too. Ontheshingle try to think of the champagne as cleverly packaged ethanol. The same substance as in any cheap cider or bargain basement sour wine. We’re being sold an image, a dream, by a clever and very effective marketing team in a big industry that makes a lot of money out of us. It’s in a prettier bottle and a prettier glass, but at the end of the day it’s all the same substance. You’ve got this and there’s no reason why this should not be your last attempt. You sound fed up with the tedium of thinking about it, and I think that’s not a bad mindset for success.

And Elsa good luck with your Christmas Day hosting, you’ve been offering a lot of lovely support to people here and on other threads and I’m sure you’ve made a difference.

Just wanted to say a big well done and good luck to everyone doing so well

I had dumb fail on my day 2, cooking with wine and automatically swigged last bit from the bottle - good few glugs, probably a glass worth  Really annoyed with myself and made me realise how easy and natural that was for me.

Sober Diaries arrived yesterday but think I might try something different - so far it's bugging me she succeeded first time and I didn't 

I AM glad I didn't just go for it with the wine though yesterday. I made a mistake, but could have just thought 'sod it' and drunk a bottle. I didn't so am clinging to that small victory for now...

Hi Jackstini, I am day one too and determined to stick with it this time. I think Clare Pooley has tried many previous times - don’t beat yourself up!
I’m finding it’s quite humbling and also a bit shocking to write down where I am. I think I always somehow felt i was a bit different and not as bad as people who say they are struggling and need support with giving up alcohol. Turns out that’s me too.