Roses are red, we like Becks Blue, Tryers to be Dryers push on through. 2019 will be our Valentine.

[Frouby]

Thread 4 for support, tips, tricks and friendship as we reduce our alcohol intake even more. For anyone who wants to reduce, stop, moderate or even just track their drinking.

Absolutely no judgement, just support. Everyone welcome.

Previous threads somewhere but am rubbish at clicky links.

Old tryers and new dryers, welcome to our thread. The one that starts in February and will see us all hit our goals as we move forwards.

Yes, that's my ultimate goal - to avoid damaging relationships and professional opportunities because I am embarrassingly drunk all the time. DM is like this - she is never abusive but gets slurry, boring and repetitive and people avoid her as a result.

Also, obviously, to avoid liver damage and cancer. This is probably harder to achieve.

It's uncanny how you all speak for me.

Leaving, I do exactly the same as you. I do manage Day One intermittently (often because I can't face anything), but then make up for it on the other days.

I know it's a bad idea to open a bottle of wine unless there is someone to drink it with me, as there's no way I will be able to leave the other half once I've started.

It's very annoying. Awake for about two hours last night with the usual beer fear. God knows why I do this to myself.

Anyway. Now on first week of half term. DC have different half terms. FML.

Longest and NC4, I am with you. I met someone recently who was sort of hyperactively drunk (I was driving, so was not drinking at all). I was a bit embarrassed for her - then realised that this must be the way I come across sometimes.

The thing is I don't drink at home alone. The trouble is I am never at home alone.

Dion I feel your pain. Dd1's friend is here now. There is much shouting going on. I daren't go and investigate. So far it's preferable to dd1 by herself coming in every few mins to say she is hungry and or bored and wanting me to fetch snacks or download apps on to her kindle (how about no?!). Remind me why I didn't book holiday club? She even (reluctantly) agreed to go, but requested one where she didn't have to do anything or talk to anyone a d could just sit in the corner with a book, and I took pity on her. In the summer she is being packed off to all sorts of wholesome activities.

Longest, if you don't drink at home alone, you're a better woman than I am... Think we need a half term support group .

Dion my kids have different school holidays too. What a PITA. Thankfully likely to be in the same school next year. I'm so over it.

Dion not at all. On the rare occasion DH is out it's such a novelty that I am happy with a bubble bath, starfishing the bed and watching junk. I know the novelty would wear off if he was out more often. Most of the time he is here getting under my feet and suggesting wine. I only managed the AF days I do because he is a stickler for two nights off and dry half-of-jan was his miserable idea. If he suggests wine I never, ever say no.

I’ll join a half term support group! It’s DS2s birthday today (yay!) so I’ve taken the day off. However, I’ve RUINED it by saying he needs a haircut.
He has psoriasis on his scalp but won’t use the shampoo as it stings and smells weird. I want to have a nice birthday photo of him, but I don’t think that’s going to happen because he’s refusing to have a trim.

I’ve just had an idea. Tell me if you think this is bonkers. He loves any kind of massage and always says he’d love a spa day when he’s old enough.
Would it be totally batshit to take him to a fancy salon for a shampoo and head massage with the funny shampoo? Then a trim after, with posh coffee and biscoff?
If I had thought ahead I could have dressed it up as a birthday treat.
But will the hairdresser think I’m weird for asking? I don’t know if I dare....

I don't think that's weird NC4! My dd1 insists on the full wash and blow dry at the hairdresser these days as a condition of going at all. Makes her feels all grown up. Of course this means I travel further to the cheaper hairdresser, but I think it's viewed as totally normal for young girls to want pampering these days so I don't see why it should be different for boys.

Happy birthday DS2! Is he officially a teenager now?

Popping on for support. I've been (badly) drunk 3 times this year after doing well following counselling. I emailed my Priory counsellor today as I've been going downhill since Halloween and I need to get a grip of this before it gets a grip of me again.

I drank way too much this weekend while dh was away on call. Ds (17) isn't talking to me. He stormed out to stay with a friend on Saturday and refused to get up for school today. Dd2 (15) is being nice, she was ok because in my fog I let her dye her hair bright pink. Dd1 lives away and has called offering support - she's 19, she shouldn't need to be helping her alcoholic mother.

My life is crap. I need to stop drinking. Period. But it's where my mind goes. I hope my counsellor will agree to see me again. I'm disabled and can't work. My life is a mess. Where do I go from here?

Oh gosh Weegie, it does sound tough. You’ve taken the first step by contacting your counsellor. Hopefully they can help you get back on track.
Are you someone that can’t really drink at all these days? I know I’m like that with smoking. If I have one I may as well have not gone through the struggle of quitting because I’ll be back to my old ways.

Oh and thanks longest - yes, officially a teenager! Two teenage boys, one frazzled mum and a crazy, dozy cat. It’s all fun and games round at my house 😂

Hello all

Welcome Weegie at least you are recognising you have a problem and aren't just denying it.

NC absolutely take him for pampering. Have a google and see if any barbers do pampering locally. My hairdressers son does a full man pamper when he is barbering and the barbers across the road do packages as well. Barbers are usually cheaper than hairdressers as well.

If I am moderating its 2 drinks, at a push 3. So half a bottle of wine or 3 beers or 3 g and ts. Usually I have 2 on moderating nights though.

Wasn't dry yesterday, 2 beers so not horrendous. According to my app to track I have had 9 less drinks than last week, with just over 20 units I think. I can live with that I reckon.

Possibly dry tonight. Tho not guaranteed. Dh finished work early, dcs have been off, have done soft play and an aldi big shop already.

Dh is off tomorrow as well. That fucker drives me to drink. Have earmarked tomorrow as a major housework day but can see that being pushed to one side as he will want to 'do something' or he will whine he's bored. Then look horrified if I suggest he helps clean. Hoping he fucks off to the allotment for a few hours, have got a poly tunnel ordered so if that turns up he can piss off and do that.

Am annoyed as I had tomorrow earmarked for a lie in as well once he'd gone to work. He's a fidgety fucker once he's awake and breathes and stuff which disturbs me earlier than I was fancying.

Evening all! Checking in! Feel very depressed today but I am so depressed with my weight and I am an emotional eater and drinker! Drinking has definitely made me 2 stone overweight for the 2 years and every January I say the same thing oh I'm going to lose 2 stone give up wine in the week etc but here I am drinking wine alone again tonight! I know people say 'well only u can change it' but it's having the motivation and dealing with all the everyday crap wine is my escape relaxes me! How is everyone doing ? Has anyone been on successful diet that included wine ? Have you heard of the wine diet ? Literally a diet!

Hi Nikita - oh how lovely if there truly was a wine diet, I think I’d manage to stick to that one! 😂 I am not AF here either. Having successfully stuck to 3 AF days since mid Jan, it’s gone out of the window this week because it’s half-term and even though we are not away in holiday I am behaving as though I am. Any fucking excuse my mind gives me and I fall for! Got my cousin and her DH visting for a week from Thursday so that will also mean non AF days. Defo back on the wagon when they go though.

This is the diet
If only ! U are basically swapping food for wine ! Which is what I do when I'm calorie counting and want wine still haha

Welcome Weegie. Sorry to hear you feel so low, we will support you as you try to cut down but it sounds like you could do with some real life support too.

Is the half term support club around? Today was not a success. DD and friend were bored and squabbly. DD had an epic tantrum at me over the "awful food" I served up over dinner. Apparently it's proof I hate her. Lots of shrieking. She has stormed off to bed leaving me a note to say she hates me and won't be speaking to me till after half term. She doesn't bloody eat anything except junk without this terrible fuss and frankly I have had enough. Can't even be arsed reading her a story, though I know I will be miserable if I don't make up with her before she goes to sleep and I am working early tomorrow.

Oh and my knees and ankles hurt. I can't work out if this is to do with exercise, hormones or some combination of the two

Two Day Ones here - Day One of half term and Day One (yet asoddinggain) AF. Beck's Blue. Sigh.

Longest, I'm sorry you had a tough day with DD. The only thing to be said for separate half terms is at least my DC can't fight with one another. I'm sorry about the joints, too. Mine are awful ATM.

NC4 happy birthday to your teenage DS! If it's not too late for me to add my bit, I think turning a haircut into a massage etc sounds like a great idea. I used to have terrible problems getting my DS to the barber. I remember once tipping him out of the car on the doorstep of the barber's shop and saying that if he didn't go in on his own, I would come in with him. He was about 14 and was not happy (school insists on short hair, so I wasn't just being a cow). Now, of course, he can't stay away from the hairdresser's .

Nikita, I'm afraid I have been known to skip food in order to use up the calories on wine instead. I do know this is somewhat shameful.

Weegie, welcome to our merry band. That does sound very, very tough for you. You have done so much that's good and right, with admitting to your problem and taking action. Contacting your counsellor sounds like an excellent idea. I think we all know how easily someone could find themselves in your situation. Hugs.

Frouby, that's very bad luck about your DH being off tomorrow. Ugh, ugh, ugh. I used to hate my XH being at home (though it's also possible that this is because he was a bastard). And much as I love DP, I think I am glad we have our own respective spaces.

I know dion I am gutted. He's gone to bed early as he doesn't feel very well. There is nothing wrong with him other than he hasn't had a drink since thursday and he is feeling 'off' in that weird way you get when you get rid of all alcohol.

I refused to make twatting quiche on the back of him being alldapoorly tho, so winning. Said if I fucked about making said twatting quiche (along with air fryer chips) he better eat it and look like he was enjoying it. He settled on a ham salad sandwhich instead 'in case he feels too poorly' to really enjoy it 😂😂😂. Dramatic fucker he is.

Dry here. Really need to lose some weight. 1lb a week for 6 months takes me to where I want to be. 1lb a week is achievable without being miserable. Its a deficit of 3500 calories. Which is what I drink roughly.

I could eat as I am, stop drinking and be 2 st lighter in 6 months.

But apparently I like drinking more than I like being slim. Sigh, sigh bastarding sigh.

Oh and dd was at school all day, doing a practical session for her d of e. We are hiring a rucksack from school and she brought it home with her. Dropped her off this morning as it's uphill but said she was to walk home as I would probably be at swimming with ds.

Phonecall at 2.45pm. Is there any chance of a lift as she has the really big, really heavy rucksack to carry home. Nothing in tbe rucksack. She has 2 hikes and camps to do with this rucksack full of kit 😂😂😂.

I also said we will try and buy her walking boots next week so she has time to break them in. Said she can practice by walking round the lake with the dog. Its about 1.5 miles. She looked horrified and said its too far. Fml.

Fuck knows how she's going to cope on the expedition 😁.

Frouby.....I could read your posts all day long. I’m Pmsl. 🤣🤣. Not from your misfortune..but the fact I can relate to everything you write. You put it so perfectly!! 🤣🤣

As for the needing to loose 2st. I really am soooo desperate to loose 2st. That’s my goal. Trouble is....I can’t be that desperate as I’m doing fuck all about it!!!! I’ve been to slimming world before and it’s dropped off. So so easily. So what’s stopping me this time?? I seem to not just be pressing the fuck it button, but actually permanently sat on the damn thing!!