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Alcohol support

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I drink a bottle of wine every day and can't seem to stop

235 replies

felttippens · 28/06/2015 10:41

The days that I try not to do it im left feeling very lost and depressed.

It is making me fat, lethargic and rubbish

Tips please of how to get this dreadful habit in check - Id like to still enjoy wine but at a less destructive/more sociable level

I don't drink anything other than wine really- if I have a lager or something I don't feel compelled to drink more but one glass of wine and before I know it ive finished the bottle

Help!

OP posts:
Caramelslice · 11/02/2016 22:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

toomanychins · 15/02/2016 19:55

Hi can I join you

I'm in bed after a very heavy weekend drinking wine on Friday and Saturday and yet again I've left myself so hungover I haven't been able to do everything I should be doing , my house is a tip, I have no energy :(

Caramelslice · 15/02/2016 22:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

whatawhoppa · 15/02/2016 22:34

I havent read all the replies but a friend of our family died on boxing day due to being a wine drinker for years. no one realised the extent of the drinking until it was too late. she would have been 32 next week. please get yourself some help if you are struggling.

toomanychins · 16/02/2016 12:31

Whatawoppa that's awful - so young :( definitely food for thought , I want to be around a long time for my kids and I won't be the way I'm going z

Blueberry234 · 19/02/2016 03:00

I would like to join in too. I admitted to my H yesterday how much I hate myself for drinking wine every evening it has to stop. I have too many additional health issues the wine is exacerbating. I am already in therapy working through some previous difficult shit I know I am using the wine as a form of harming myself. We agreed last night to stop buying wine. I know this is going to be tough as when sober I am more present with my thoughts.
I need to learn to be kind to myself and drinking is not kind.

Shockers · 22/02/2016 08:57

Hey there, hope you're all well this morning.

I'm back from a not-so-dry holiday. I didn't drink last night and was glad. I don't want to drink again for the foreseeable.

What I (we?) need is to find other ways to occupy our minds. I have lost all my creativity over the last few years, and am determined to reclaim it.

notanothercheesesandwich · 22/02/2016 21:11

Thank you. I have just read through all the posts. I too drink too much can (and usually do) put away a bottle of wine or 4 strongbows a night. I really want to stop and be able to drink occasionally. I did a bootcamp detox a few months ago and gave up for 3 weeks but it was too much giving up everything - all treats, carbs, dairy and alcohol! and just made me crave it all more. I do want to lose weight but i think it would be easier to tackle 1 issue at a time. I didn't drink yesterday and was toying with a glass of wine tonight, but this thread has given me the strength to keep going.

Shockers · 22/02/2016 21:41

I went to aquafit tonight and I feel great. My mind feels less clouded and more positive.

Other than the holiday blip, I've been doing pretty well and the urge to drink every evening is diminishing.

Notanother, I found I had to replace the carbs in the wine with food carbs for the first week or so- gradually cutting the amounts down. The shaky cravings were too much- I think one battle at a time is the way forward!

Sara1989 · 23/02/2016 11:58

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Shockers · 23/02/2016 19:23

Why have we got a deletion on this (usually) lovely, supportive thread?! I feel a bit unnerved now.

redmimi · 23/02/2016 20:31

Shockers I have been lurking on this thread and read the post earlier before it was deleted. It looked like a dodgy advertising link to be honest so I wouldn't worry.

I have had a bad few weeks alcohol wise but haven't had a drink in 2 weeks now and am finding it liberating. There is honestly nothing I miss, for now at least, and I am sleeping so well. Unfortunately it was being prescribed antidepressants that has prompted my dry spell but I can't think of anything I miss about the constant cycle of craving a drink, not being able to stop at a couple, then beating myself up about it the next day before starting all over again to cheer myself up.

Wishing you all luck.

Shockers · 23/02/2016 21:40

Thank you redmimi, I was a bit bothered by that!

I know exactly what you mean- I feel liberated too. I've spent the evening sewing something for a story at school and starting a knitting project. I also have more money in my account than I usually would at this time of the month.

I had a thought earlier about the last time I felt rotten in the morning. I would never dream of eating something that would make me feel ill- on purpose. Alcohol is a poison, but we willingly take it for fun. It's really daft when you think about it, isn't it?

redmimi · 23/02/2016 21:57

When I'm not drinking I wonder why I would ever inflict the groggy/hungover feeling on myself! Unfortunately I'm not that logical when the wine takes hold.

I agree it's good to keep busy and nice to feel productive! I have the Marie Kondo book 'the life changing magic of tidying' and am busying myself having a good clear out.

notanothercheesesandwich · 24/02/2016 11:15

On to day 4 for me and really pleased to have resisted temptation. I have a stinking cold so usually I would have drunk to cheer myself up (any excuse). I can so relate to the cycle of drinking, not stopping then beating myself up about it the next day (although very rarely have hangovers so don't have that to put me off). I want to try and focus on getting the long put off list of evening things done that I dont do once a sit down to relax - drink!

Shockers · 25/02/2016 15:31

Hello everyone! Hope you're all well. As the weekend looms, I have two parties to attend. I'm not planning to abstain, but drinking when I'm out has never been a huge problem- it's more the sitting in front of the TV night after night drinking alone and being crabby with the kids in the morning.
Tonight is a low key affair with friends who aren't huge drinkers, so I'll probably just have a couple and a really nice chat. Tomorrow is a colleague's milestone birthday, at a lovely restaurant (with good wine), with some big drinkers. I'll pace myself and hopefully have a good evening without feeling rough on Saturday.

I'm enjoying not drinking during the week, so the old routine is not something I want to slip back into.

Hope you all have a good weekend.

teaforoneplease · 01/03/2016 13:39

Hello Everyone, I've read this thread with interest. Lovely to hear from people like me. I drank too much for years and always knew I had a problem. I knew I would have to tackle it properly one day. I kept trying to cut back or I stopped for a short time but the general pattern of my drinking was that it was still increasing. I was seeing a psychiatrist anyway for anxiety and he referred me to an addiction therapist. She advised AA. I go to 2 meetings per week and it has been amazing. I struggle with the God part of it but just overlook that. I have to say, it is brilliant to be with people like us. It's a great deterrent to hear their stories. Remember, the only requirement for AA is a desire to stop drinking. You don't have to stink of urine and sleep on a park bench to be welcomed. I feel so much better. I drank a bottle of wine per day and I dread to think where that would have lead.

Toounhappynow · 08/03/2016 22:17

Can I join? I need to stop. I do the equivalent of a bottle of wine a night - only drink clear spirits. I am fat, sad, exhausted and unproductive. Nothing good about this at all. And I hate myself most of the time. Apart from that everything is fine and dandy!

Shockers · 12/03/2016 12:00

Welcome Too!
I know that feeling only too well.

I've slipped a bit over the past 2 weeks. I need to get back on my wagon of productivity, good health and weight loss.

I find the more I drink, the less inclined I am to do anything about it.

tangerino · 24/03/2016 13:58

Has anyone come across the mummywasasecretdrinker blog? I've found it really helpful.

Shockers · 24/03/2016 14:47

I'll have a look for that, tangerino.

whoopsididit · 27/03/2016 10:02

Well I've done it again, I'm like a lot on this thread, permanent battle - so much wine on Friday I've been in bed ever since sinking slowly lower !

Drinking to excess Ramps up my depression, I'm now lying here feeling very detached. Didn't get up and do Easter hunt with kids just let them and Dh get on with it.
Wasn't interested

Haven't got up to watch ds play rugby

Persuaded dd to watch film in bed with Easter egg for breakfast so i can stay here

I'm just lying here feeling how fat I am, what a mess the house is and how crap I'm being at mothering

Yet I'll probably do it again later and be the life and soul

Blush
Shockers · 30/03/2016 16:33

Hey Whoops, how are you now?

I think it's harder to give up when you have smaller children at home, unless you can find an alcohol-free activity, which they can join in with. When you're just getting through the day and waiting for the acceptable time to pour your first drink, it's nigh on impossible to summon up the willpower- if you're the type that finds alcohol difficult to resist (I do).

I have a darkest hour, where I caught sight of myself looking bloated and unhappy, stuffing my face to soak up the wine... on my own. I was 3 sizes larger than I am now- and I do still drink, but I won't during the week anymore, unless I'm out, having dinner somewhere nice.

The biggest help to me has been taking up exercise. I have to work towards a goal- something sponsored so I'd be letting people down if I dropped out.

I also bought a really good bike on 0% finance. That's £50 a month which I won't allow myself to spend on wine. Thing is, I want to be up and fit to ride at weekends, so that's a big incentive too.

Of course, as I said, it's much easier to take off for a run, a ride, or a class now that my children are older.

I think it's a question of working out a personal plan of avoidance until the worst of the nightly cravings have subsided.

Lilaclily · 30/03/2016 17:13

Hi everyone , love this thread

I am a classic mummy wine drinker beginning in about 2004 to 2016, with a couple of breaks for pregnancy and dieting !

I'm 40 now and I noticed as well as putting on weight due to the bottle most days habit one of my feet , bunion area, was aching? I was worrying I had gout! And my skin was awful
I was also hiding booze from dh, when I went for a night out I'd go to another pub first and have a drink there first, I had a bottle of red in a cupboard upstairs that I'd top up when going to the look so dh didn't know how much I was drinking
I always drank more than everyone else if I wasn't drinking alone
So I decided to do dry January and that led to giving up for lent and now I haven't had a drink since 1.1.2016
But I don't know whether to give up permanently or not
I've noticed my foot has stopped aching !
I come from a family of big drinkers, well my dad and brother but I'm known for joining in
I've also lost 1.5 stone but now feel paranoid about drinking just a small glass in case I put it back on
Tbh I think I've got an eatijg disorder as I've got a very restricted diet as
I'm paranoid about what I eat now
Hope you don't mind me sharing

Stellar67 · 03/04/2016 07:34

Hello all, I thought I had a problem then I stopped and would have a glass of something on the weekend. But recently this has ramped itself back up and on not happy. Can't sleep, weight is stuck, I'm so grumpy. It's a habit to sit at night with a large glass once the kids are in bed. I don't want it to take over.

So I'm going to go dry. Hope it's okay if I update here. Caramel I had a look at your blog but did you stop doing it?