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Adoption

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Original poster

newborn adoption

642 replies

BrightSunshineyDay · 08/06/2014 06:22

I gave birth yesterday and immediately relinquished responsibility. I have so much going round in my head right now that I hope no-one minds if I blurt it out here.
I will be speaking with social workers tomorrow so I want to think of as many questions as possible. I know without a doubt I am doing the right thing. He will go to a foster family for a few weeks until new parents are found (I was in denial about the pregnancy until only a couple ofdays ago)
How quickly will he be found a new family? Will the new family be in my local area? Should I write him a letter explaining my life circumstances and his birth story? Should I get him a keepsake? Is letterbox contact the best thing for him and his new family? Thats all I want. What is best for him. I want to do whatever is best so he can grow up not feeling abandoned or deserted. I want him to know I love him but I want him to have the best life possible.
Please tell me there are parents/a parent out there who are just about to receive into their life the most perfect beautiful boy, and they will be kind and loving and settled.
Sorry for the brain dump - I've been awake for hours and this is all going round in my head.

OP posts:

flamingtoaster · 19/06/2014 20:21

Another lurker - so pleased to hear your happy news. Hope it's not long before he is with you.

Thumbwitch · 19/06/2014 20:22

Very pleased for you Bright, especially the daily contact - woohoo!

I wasn't kidding about getting your Dad to evict you, by the way - my sister was told by the Council that she should do that because it would expedite them sorting out a place for her MIL - so do look into that as an option at least, to start with, if you can't afford private rental.

Please tell your Dad and your other children very quickly now as well, if you haven't already!

for you and your lovely new DS - excellent plan to rename him as well. xx

BonjourMinou · 19/06/2014 20:37

So, so thrilled to read your update. Was tossing and turning worrying about you last night, and was so glad to read you got the cuddles you need and deserve. What a strong, brave woman and mother you are. Looking forward to reading all about the day you finally take him home. All the best with the preparations.

marriednotdead · 19/06/2014 21:27

mummyof2munchkins · 19/06/2014 21:28

Bright, Hats off , you are doing everthing for the good of your baby and your older children.

I am one of those who, carried away with the thought of big bad SS taking away a child who belongs with his mum wanted you to take him home. All credit to you for putting your own feelings aside and putting your children first.

Your story is amazing, i've never before seen so many pages full of support for an OP. Thoroughout you have maintained a totally level headed approach.

I'm so glad you now have daily contact with your baby. When all is right he will be with you full time.

I hope one day you look back and know you loved your baby enough to change so much for him and somehow along the way you made mumsnet unite in support of you and your family.

hugs and congrats. xxx

Original poster

BrightSunshineyDay · 19/06/2014 21:44

Thankyou all so much
I'm not seeing dad till tomorrow evening so will tell him then, and then the DC. I will stay as close as possible to the truth when I tell them. I have been practising in my head
Housing will be my first port of call in he morning. Teenage DC needs his own room, dd and ds2 can share for couple of years? and ds3 and I can share? Oh my, ds sounds good

I really appreciate all the advice and support from everyone so Thankyou . Thankyou so much
If its ok I'll probably post a little update when I bring him home.

OP posts:

LittleMisslikestobebythesea · 19/06/2014 21:50

Of course you can post updates much as you like :)

You soun so happy OP, well done

500smiles · 19/06/2014 21:52

We are all rooting for you and would love to hear as many updates as you care to share. You've done so so well.

spiderlight · 19/06/2014 21:53

'If it's OK' - after half of Mumsnet have been holding their breath for days?! We positively insist on an update once he's home!

ReeseWithoutHerSpoon · 19/06/2014 21:56

I can't wait to read an update when he's home! X

HappySunflower · 19/06/2014 21:56

Oh I am so pleased to see the latest. You must feel as though a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.
When it comes to housing- get letters from everyone you can: GP, health visitor, social worker. Get letters as soon as you can. Social services can make representations for housing for those with the highest priority needs. This most certainly covers your situation so I suggest you contact the sw again tomorrow to ask for his help with this ASAP.

Please do update us as often as you feel you'd like to, I can't think of anyone who won't feel interested in how things are going :)
I hope that telling your Dad and the children goes as well as it possibly can. xx

Cornettoninja · 19/06/2014 21:57

Oh bright I'm so pleased for you it all went well, no doubt you've still got stuff to sort out, but hold on to this feeling and remember why your doing it. I've been nothing but a bystander and you've touched me.

Please update whenever you feel the need

jkhj · 19/06/2014 22:06

Can't wait to hear all about when he is home, your home with all of your dear children.

Rest well tonight, it is going to work out fine!xx

BrianTheMole · 19/06/2014 22:39

So pleased for you op. Thats great. Really good.

Italiangreyhound · 20/06/2014 00:08

Bright fab news.

happydazed · 20/06/2014 00:45

amazing, so happy for you all x

Catticals · 20/06/2014 01:15

Now that is great news to come back from work to:)

OpiesOldLady · 20/06/2014 07:00

Good luck with telling your dad later x

deXavia · 20/06/2014 07:11

delurking - and if at all possible thinking about you more today than yesterday. So glad you got to see your DS and also spoke to the SW but now you do have the next hill to climb. I hope it went smoothly telling you Dad and the other DC - and if it didn't don't panic - it must rate up there as the biggest shocks that anyone would have to face. Not so much 'I'm pregnant' but 'I've given birth....' People may need time to adjust (possible understatement of the year...)
Hopefully Housing is also going well - will the SW help you there? Can he refer or point you to the best advice for your area?

Good luck with today.

BabyShake · 20/06/2014 07:26

take care?

DalmationStripe · 20/06/2014 08:06

Oh bright, I'm so happy for you. Xxxxx

BBQsAreSooooOverrated · 20/06/2014 08:56

Just read your thread from start to finish. So glad you've finally been able to see your baby. I agree with choosing a new name for your ds. Good luck with everything

Mama1980 · 20/06/2014 09:18

So happy to read your update bright. Good luck today, and I'm full of admiration for your desire to get this right and strength.
X

Itsfab · 20/06/2014 09:50

Just a thought, can you take a camera on your visits so you can have daily photos and also leave a t shirt for the baby to sleep with so he gets to know your smell.

marriednotdead · 20/06/2014 10:48

Another one who has been thinking of you and willing you on. You can do this, and with help and support you'll have your family together very soon

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