Would you be comfortable if your daughter was assigned a male nursery worker?

[Nervousb2b]

Out of interest, how would you feel if your daughter was assigned a male member of staff in an early years setting to provide intimate care? Would you feel just as comfortable if a female member of staff was assigned?

Some may be okay with it, some may not - interested to see the general consensus.

Wow i don't know anything really about that case but 11 to 16 babies is horrendous.
I wonder whether the paying parents were aware of this ??

No problem at all, just like I don't care if my pilot is a woman, and I don't care about anyone's race or religion. I've seen too many brown men looked at askance.
A few years ago, my friend's daughter had an amazing young man as her key worker.
Of course, she could have sent her to another nursery-where that lovely Vanessa George worked and she could have had her instead...

Even in the 60s, not everyone was fooled by the nice woman Myra Hindley, and surely no one would fall for the women are all sweet little angels today. And we want our kids to grow up in a world where they know everyone can do anything, and our daughters know it's not just up to women to look after kids!

My son’s nursery has a male staff member in the baby room. But I don’t worry much more than I do about the female nursery workers (for no reason other than that I am a worrier). My son really likes him, he’s often the only one who can calm him down if he’s upset. He also always smiles and is happy to go in when he sees him. I hope I would be able to tell if something wrong is happening.

I know mine did too at your DS age but it was so hard to find a job.

On the other hand an acquaintances DH is a childminder- he currently has an 18 month waiting list has been a childminder for 20 years and ‘his’ kids come back to see him and his family all the time. So I hope your son thrives in his carer choice.

To answer OP yes both my kids had male nursery nurses I had no issue with this. No child was changed out of site from another nursery worker and 2 staff were always in the sleep rooms.

Are you practicing a comedy routine here? It’s good.

In Australia it has recently come to light that a male childcare worker had abused and took photos of his phone of hundreds of children. Going back years. They are still trying to track down all the victims. Phones are now banned in childcare.

Where do you all live that you can afford to be choosey in this way? Will you be so choosey for your own elderly care?

Why? Cleaning around the genitals is about as intimate as we can get I’d say. Using generic euphemisms doesn’t change the fact that a child in this situation is utterly vulnerable.

No. Men and women are not Interchangeable. Men are more of a risk in this context, at a population level. And that’s what counts not individual stories of lovely kind male nursery workers.

I’m in France where there is an absolute scandal of sexual and physical abuse of 3-5 year olds in nursery. While male nursery workers are the minority overall, all the cases so far are of men.

One of many, but this one was particularly awful as it's involved hundreds of babies and little children having to be tested for STDs. He moved around a lot. Parents spoke highly of him until he was caught, in similar terms as posts in this thread.

I won't go into the disgusting details but this arsehole is especially perverted and there's more to it than what you would expect.

I was a little uncomfortable when my daughter moved up a room at Nursery and one of the team were male. That said, he was wonderful; I’m uncomfortable about my unconscious bias towards feeling he shouldn’t have been in that role because he was an absolute gem of an early years practitioner.

I will be absolutely this choosy for my mum and for myself.

Absolutely would not be comfortable with it, for girls or boys. Not worth the risk.

Why isn’t the male worker helping the boys in the toilet? Seems odd to assign a girl to him. There was a male nursery teacher at my son’s nursery - they were all toilet trained as over 3 but there was a policy that he’d only help the boys.

From a young age I’ve taught my DC to use the correct words for penis and vagina, and made it clear that they are private parts to them, so they’d at least be able to tell me that someone had touched them, if they had. Not the case with a baby/non-verbal child.

Not a chance

No.
Sorry. I’m sure there are some good eggs out there but I would not take a chance.

Why? Are boys less at risk?
Presumably when he wasn't there, women helped boys.

I’d describe nappy changing as intimate care. Help with going to the toilet of a toilet trained toddler perhaps is personal care.

I want to say it would be fine because I don't think that caring for children is inherently women's work and I think in principle men should be able to do jobs typically done by women. But I know that personally I would have hated it if a man was changing DD's nappy.

I have no words, of course male childcare workers should be trusted, like all things it's the minority that ruin it for the majority... Are you saying no male relative should care for your child either???

This thread makes me really sad, my 12year old son wants to be a nursery teacher he’s definitely not wanting to become a nursery teacher to abuse kids! He’s just great with little ones and loves his little brother and niece and nephews!

Just don't take your child to that nursery.

I'm supposed to say, "Yes! Of course it's OK!", because I'm a teacher of Early Years Education.

But fuck that!

No, no, no.

Would you trust Nathan Bennett, Jayden McCarthy, Vincent Chan?