Is concern about shorter men’s attractiveness mainly an online exaggeration? In my experience it is

[KJ311]

Have only quite recently found out about this, probably in about the last year or so, but after having a nose on other halfs mn account and seeing a few height related threads, nearly all featuring at least a few women being quite vocal about not finding shorter men attractive [definitely not all women but quite a few], as well as seeing a few other social media platforms featuring content relating to shorter men being undesirable, left me feeling very perplexed. For the record I am male, 33, 5'7'' [maybe hovering around 5'8'', haven't checked my height in a while but around 5 7/5 8]so not drastically short but definitely nowhere near what could be called tall, and have never once experienced "heightism" in my day to day life, I have been in 4 relationships over the years and have never struggled at all with dating, including during my teenage years when girls are usually at there most superficial, and no one has ever even mentioned my height. My current partner, soon to be mother of my first child is 5'3''.

Just recently when looking online I have seen literally tons of online articles and social media, as well as threads with comments [including on here!] basically painting the picture that if your a shorter man your pretty much going to struggle immensely with being found attractive, I'm sorry but this doesn't translate in any way to the real world, and is completely debunked by walking down any high street and witnessing literally millions of shorter men of all ages who are married or have girlfriends. To me it just seems to be one of those weird online things thats heavily exaggerated [not completely untrue but definitely exaggerated], just wondered if anyone else noticed the same?

Get off the internet, go somewhere busy, and look at all the men, short, ugly, fat or whatever, with their partners, who are also, short, ugly, fat or whatever.

Some people care, most people don't.

Because she's not comparing his height with her own. She's comparing it with other men. Just as a man who states he prefers slim women wouldn't typically mean 'any woman lighter than me'.

Yes and modern day cultural conditioning has warped the perception of what is short and actually short, and what's tall and actually tall, nowadays its often shown that anything under 6ft is considered short which is absolutely not true

Some women see 6ft as an ‘ideal’ height. Your partner obviously didn’t which is good for you!

Can't remember if I said this before or not, but many women have no idea what 6ft actually looks like. Period
People think dh is 6ft. He's not; inch shy and more now he's shrinking. His posture is terrible, so often he's not much than my height- 5'9. But people, including men, sometimes think I'm 6ft.

Spider man is 5ft 6 and Lionel Messi is 5ft 7.

You've got a partner so it obviously doesn't matter to her it's probably just some people's preference and that's OK people tend to be more vocal about what they don't like than what they do.

And Thor is 6ft 3 and (the latest) Superman is 6ft 4! 😜

Yes. I know, I just think its silly to say that anything under 6ft is short, It might be below someone's preference but that doesn't mean its short. Otherwise I agree

Do you think of yourself as short?

I didn't expect this thread to still be going since I posted it a week ago, and only just saw this question you asked me so I hope you don't mind me replying two days later

I think of myself as slightly short, but not significantly so, I used to feel around average before I was aware height was such a thing as I generally feel I blend in everywhere, but I guess yeah I am slightly short

I’m on the shorter side of tall. I prefer men who are taller than me but I guess it’s all relative and if I was 5’1” I’d probably go for someone a couple of inches taller than that.

I'm short and prefer taller men (but imo like you say chemistry trumps everything - I've really fancied shorter men but if I was in an app situation it's probably "pick" taller if it's just a list of attributes and no chemistry to distinguish people). But I find the idea that "you're short so why isn't a short man that's taller than you fine" a bit of a strange thing to say.

Imo it's never about them being taller than me (basically all men are taller than me) it's about what I find physically attractive. I find taller men more physically attractive in general.

It's like saying to a man who likes bigger boobs "well her boobs are bigger than yours so why do you care if a woman has even bigger boobs than a small breasted woman?" It's just what they find more attractive...

But in general I agree that the online stuff about height is overblown. As a teen I exclusively dated men over 6ft for a brief time, but actually I'm still totally attracted to "short" men - it's all about chemistry!

Final post by me and not expecting replies but I just checked back on this thread out of curiosity after losing interest for over a week and to be honest its actually funny when I look back at this thread after not coming here for a bit, for some reason a few people [not all] seemed to think that just being curious and wondering why I have only seen shorter men being spoken about negatively online due to never experiencing it in real life meant I was looking for affirmation due to being secretly insecure, for some reason people can't seem to take a question for what it is and assume there is some underlying reason for it, which never existed in this case

I showed my "OH" this and asked her opinion and according to her anyone over 5'6'' feels tall to her😅😂[she's 5'3''], so this, along with the rest of my experience pretty much confirms that the hundreds of women who seem to pop up online claiming they would never date a shorter [shorter being still taller than them but below 5'11/6'0'']man are very much a vocal minority. I'm not saying women don't generally have a preference for tall men but those who follow that mindset I mentioned are nothing like as common as online makes it seem to be. I originally posted here just wondering if anyone else noticed the same thing, which a few did but heigh hoe😅

Tall man for me!

But in general I agree that the online stuff about height is overblown.

Definitely. No matter what you read on line, the men walking around in real life are still the same mix of heights as they were 5 years ago!

I don't really see it as an issue. But then I've never been overly fussed by looks. Most of the extremely handsome men I've known have been absolute snakes.

I thought it was a male perception thing. I don’t think women really stress too much about it but maybe some men do.

We all come in different shapes and sizes and so there is enough to go around for everyone whatever one’s preferences.

Just an anecdote, that maybe reiterates my point. Years ago I had a boyfriend who was 5’ 7, I am 5’4. We went shopping and I fell in love with a pair of 3inch Donna Karen Stilettos. “Oh look” I gushed. His look spoke a thousand words. I quickly put them down and moved on. We split up not long after. Not for that but he clearly wasn’t the right one.

OP - Peter Crouch is really tall, he looks very ungainly and I wouldn't date him!

5.10 and above for me. I like wearing heels and I think as a woman you want your partner to be taller/bigger than you! I'm 5.4 for reference

I keep getting notifications for this post and tbh the last post I made above was meaning to be the last one so wasn't really expecting any replies to it, but this really is my final reply on this thread

To be honest, after a week or two not looking on here, looking back at not all, but quite a few of the replies to this, it really reinforces to me what a gem my OH is, as someone who cares more about things that actually matter [ie who I am as a person] rather than place an absolute priority on needing to have one purely superficial physical trait, fortunately I haven't come across this often at all in real life, only ever online, [including here!], as per the original point of this post