Things you're doing in your life right now that would sound bonkers if you told anyone, but make sense to you....

[HundredsOfTinyWillies]

I'm currently stalking a man in my neighbourhood because I love his dog. I've bumped into this man and his dog twice. I've started going out at the same-ish time and walking the same-ish route in the hopes of meeting him his dog

I have a whole imaginary world in my head where I'm a former supermodel now living a quiet life in the countryside. When I'm pottering around doing household chores, I pretend Louis Theroux is following me asking me probing questions about my tough childhood and stratospherically successful career.

I plan retirement every single day. I model different scenarios with different levels of income. I look at properties in retirement communities a lot. I'm 40.

I would never say these things out loud to another human because they make me sound absolutely bonkers. But there it is.
Tell me your weirdness that you could never verbalise...

You could just get a random bunch of keys to hand over....

Another lottery win planner. I have a long and growing list of people and charities I would be giving the majority of it away to.

Ooooh now that's interesting!!

Good shout! 👍 They're good hot showers; I've used them in the past when we've overnighted there with our touring caravan - at the service area, not the caravan park, although we have spent a nice week there.

I must be a lot more selfish because my lottery win fantasies only involve things for me and my children! There'd be a select small people I'd give to - my parents, my in-laws, husbands siblings, partner and children (who are all wonderful. My own siblings are getting absolutely zero) and my best friend and her kids. Hadn't even considered anyone else over above this!

Me and DH do a banging adaptation of "I Know Him So Well" for our dog called "We Love Her So Much"

DH is Barbara Dixon, I'm Elaine Page.

Its the dog's favourite song, sends her to sleep almost instantly.

@HundredsOfTinyWillies love the user name !

Barbara Dixon has the better part, though! Insist on a periodical swap to keep everyone on their toes!

Gosh that reminds me that my DD and I used to duet Barbra Streisand and Celine Dion's "Tell him ."
"Tell him, tell him that the sun and moon rise in his eyes
reach out to him
and whisper words so soft and sweet .......
epic as there are so many opportunities for soaring vocals .
Alas, neither of us can sing in tune but it was so funny we always cracked up and could never finish it!

I've been daydream all the time recently about opening a toast cafe - just toast with all various kinds of toppings (and mugs of tea to go with...of course).

I did tell sister about my little dream but she said it would never hit off so it'll remain a pie in the sky dream.

I serve up dinner as Head of NASA Mission Control

”Plates?”…..”Go”
”Chops?”….”Go”
”Sauce?”…”Go”
“Mash?”……”Go”
”Wine……….”Go”

I respond to myself.

DH and DS roll their eyes but they are used to me by now

I had a favourite fork. It disappeared one day and food has never been the same since.

I’ll be very sad if this thread fizzles out, I’ve loved it!

Me too!

Me three!

I'm going mug hunting this morning. I fear I shall have to start lowering my standards.

Let's see:

I have a favourite lunch 'dish', it's a Winnie the Pooh 'sketchbook' pasta bowl given to me by DS2. Perfect size, weight, density with the original EH Shepard characters. I use it for pretty much anything I have for lunch.

I have a favourite spoon for my oatmeal and 2 favourite forks that I use depending on what I'm eating.

Mugs depend on my mood. But they are all light coloured or white inside. Can't abide a mug that's dark inside. Right now it's my Le Crueset in Shallot. The rest of my mugs don't get jealous, they know they'll each have their turn as favourite. Except one. It's black inside and out so sort of sits in the back of the cupboard, pining. I use it for water every so often.

Do they still do nominations for classics on MN? You could nominate it. It's in chat so it will disappear otherwise.

I have absolutely no idea, thank you, I will find out 😊

We've just done this again this morning!

On the news they were reporting on the man who won the London Marathon and the fact that he has smashed a new world record for the fasted time ever.

DH just turned to me and said 'See HeadDesk? The first year that you don't enter and someone else comes in and sets a new world record. If you'd have been there that would have been you.'

And I told him it was only fair I took a break from my marathon running some years, to give other people a chance of glory.

I have never run a marathon. I can barely run for a bus.

😂😂😂

I definitely think there is scope for a compilation album by various artists, (general members of the public) of songs people compose or adapt, then sing to their dogs. It would be a best seller.

My dog was called Max. I used to sing 'Oh Maxxie. Oh-oh-oh-oh.' To the tune of Volare

I call my dog Stinker and sing "Stinkadoo" to the tune of "Xanadu" to her. She can't even hear me, she's congenitally deaf.

Yes, yes, yes to a compilation of songs we sing to our pets!!

It's a bit niche but me and DH also sing a version of "I Love My Daughter" from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend to the dog.

It's called "I Love My Border". She's a border terrier.

Sometimes I also put a little headscarf on the dog and pretend she's the Virgin Mary and sing "Little Donkey" to her.