What normal things can you not do?

[Soubriquet]

I can’t blow up a balloon. It hurts my ears
I can’t click

Ride a bike. Or swim in a straight line

I really struggle with unlocking / locking doors.

Can’t click my fingers, can’t whistle and can’t do that popping thing with my finger inside my cheek (but that’s because if I do, my nails lacerate my mouth).

drive

Can't clock my fingers. Or dive into a pool. Loads of people have tried to teach me both.

My fingers are crap on touch screens! It's bloody essential for life these days, I can't even call the lift at work.

Get out of a chair without making that "arrrgh" noise.

Click not clock!

I can only wink with my right eye and not my left eye.

I'm a really strong swimmer, but I cannot dive. I've even had professional lessons to try to learn. Still do a belly flop.

Can't ride a bike either.

Can't bowl. Given up trying. Avoid all bowling parties now.

Whistle
Roll my R's

Drive. Swim. Tell left from right.

(Conversely, I pick up languages very easily and have an unusually retentive memory.)

Find my way to - well almost anywhere. I have the worst sense of direction of anyone I’ve ever known. I’m confused by the simplest of routes. If sense of direction was spelling, I’d be barely able to print my own name.

Click fingers, roll r's, whistle.

I can't belch

I would go private and pay good money for Belch Enablement surgery, I can tell you.

Plaiting/braiding hair. Just can't seem to grasp it at all.

That’s fascinating. How can’t you? I mean, I assume you have the same bodily chemistry as belchers, but something inhibits it somewhere? Not that I’ve ever thought about what exactly causes a belch…

Remember where I left the car. This amuses my children.

Walk down stairs without hanging on to a bannister. We go to a great bar in Amsterdam but I know I won't be able to.go for a wee as the loos are down a flight of steep Dutch steps without a bannister.

Blow up a balloon

Ride a bike

Braid hair

Can relate. Now have a "my spot" in all regularly used car parks. Saves a LOT of time and swearing.

Throw. I'm ace at catching but my throwing is embarrassing. The amount of dog toys I've thrown straight upwards into a tree branch instead of forwards for the dog

I'm terrible at saying new words or names. It's like my brain tries to force me to say sounds I already know thereby ignoring letters.

I could NEVER be a chemist pronouncing all those long unusual names.

I can't use the tube. I'm totally phobic if it and it gives me a panic attack. I had to once last year and it was really awful. I felt like I'd ran a marathon and been beaten up by Mike Tyson, mentally?! I kept on feeling like I was going to fall on the escalator or onto the tracks!

I wouldn't be able to rewire a plug or put oil in the car, or put a shelf up, as I've never had to, but I'm sure I could learn if I had to.

I can braid hair but only a basic plait or French plait.