AIBU husband w*nking

[FarmerJojo81]

What are people's views on this? I know my husband does it and he says he needs to orgasm daily so if we don't have sex for a few days then I understand he gets frustrated. I turn a blind eye but know it goes on discretely - fine. For context we have had issues with our sex live since DC was born but have been trying to get back on track and this week have been having regular sex. Today I walked into the bedroom and he was having a wank whilst watching something on his phone. I was annoyed as it was morning and I was in the kitchen getting child's breakfast. I came looking for husband to see where he was. Child could have easily walked in. I was livid.

He is now annoyed with me as I "shamed" him and overreacted. I have apologised for storming out but not for being angry and said I don't take responsibility for his actions. He's saying it's all about how I make him feel and connected to our sex life problems.

Yeah wanking is fine, your kids walking in on you wanking to porn is gross though.

No kid has walked in on anyone wanking to porn though have they? Why are people creating their own version of the OP post?

And doing it while your partner would probably rather you be helping out with the general household!

@ModernDayHell Wanking is fine....point out where in my post where I said it wasn't? Considering I do it as well...I said doing it when/where your kids may walk in is grim. Not respecting that your partner may not want to know the details about your wanking is also grim.

I think this is quite weird to be upset by. . Surely everyone masturbates and he was in his bedroom? I wouldn’t imagine it took up hours of family time

YABU

My teen dd recently told me that as a very young child she woke up feeling sick.She went into our bedroom to find my ex wanking to porn on his laptop. She said she felt disgusted and scared and went back to bed and cried.

He didn’t even notice she had come in.

If I had known about this at the time I would have kicked him out. It’s irresponsible and gross to risk exposing small children to wanking and porn.

Oh my god she was making breakfast for one child!!! I had a wank the other night - should I have been cleaning instead? Or ironing? Or jetwashing the patio??? There's so many chores to be done how dare I use my time so selfishly!

At the end of the day we could all be "helping out with the general household" at any given time of day - people (parents included!) are allowed to have some time to themselves to scroll on their phone, watch TV, stare into space or indeed.... have a wank!

No wanking when there’s cleaning to be done!!!

He's not hurting anyone. Maybe it was under the duvet so his modesty was covered.

@Trixiefirecracker
"Wanking is fine, only on MN do people constantly froth about it."

I'd love to see this mythical frothing. Could you provide a link or two?

That actually didn’t happen though?

Please read the thread, this one for example.

Brace yourself, a fresh wanking thread has just appeared. Frothers will be incoming in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1....

You have completely missed the point here. It’s about where and when he was doing it not that he was doing it at all. Their dc could have walked in at any minute.

@Trixiefirecracker

Wanking where a child could easily walk in-presumably you don't think that's a good idea?

Jesus Christ. No child walked in and saw him wanking!!!

Tell him to do it in the shower where the door is locked.

So what about having sex then? Because I know for a fact that plenty of parents have kids who have walked in whilst they've been having sex. Even if it's late at night and they think the kids are in bed. So shouldn't adults with children have any sex life at all unless it's outside of the family home?

But he didnt. Cant live life on what ifs. He'd have been listening out for the childs footsteps. And if he has a wank a day he is an expert wanker.

its completely inappropriate to be openly having a wank whilst the kids are bustling about.

It would really put me off a man if he couldn’t keep his hand off his nob long enough to get the kids out the house. Has he no control?

Grim

No issue with that whatsoever

Wanking where and when you might be discovered by another member of the family is plain grim. Elevate your standards.

Better still if you're concerned about your DC walking in teach them to knock on a bedroom/bathroom door before entering.

But surely this is a done thing anyway..

Firstly he doesn’t “need” to wank. He wants to wank and that’s fine. If it was a “need” he wouldn’t have to watch porn to get there. Secondly I agree sat on the bed when there are kids running about and it’s breakfast time is just grim.

I only put an * in the title because I once posted a sex question on here and got inundated with private messages from men who I gathered had just searched for key words.