14 year old DD pregnant

[reddevil83]

Found out today that my 14 year old DD is pregnant. DD doesn't want anyone to know so I have come on here as I just need someone to talk too.
I don't even know what to write on here I am so shocked.

Does she want to keep the baby?

What a shock for you both. Presumably she has done a test. Has she got any idea of how far along she is?

If she sort want anyone to know , assume she has already thought of abortion ?
Are you supporting of her wishes & has she told the father ? It must have been a shock for you . Does she know how far along she is ? Drs next I suppose.

It’s going to take a couple of days to sink in. Do you know who the Father is as she is underage?

At that age I would be encouraging a termination.

Sorry a few typos there !

Helpful

Who’s the father? Same age or older?

That is beyond unhelpful in this day and age

You must be so concerned for her.

If this happened to someone in my family I would urge them to consider an abortion, to minimise the impact this has on her life.

how are you feeling about all this op? I bet it’s a terrible shock. Has your daughter said on what she would like to do?

Does she know how far through she is? Poor thing must be terrified, I hope it works out - good luck

I think the first thing to do it reassure her, and you, that this is something that can be dealt with.

it’s not the end of the world.

first thing to find out how far along she is. Ime if they can take the tablets to terminate if that’s their choice it’s a much lesser psychological impact than surgical management where it feels like a big deal.

if she does want to keep it then you both will need to make some good plans re. How she stays in education and raises the child. It’s likely you will be relied on significantly, can you do that? She needs a social worker to put these things in place asap.

I was hoping someone would be along to pass judgement 🙄

If you don't want to be helpful then take your judgy pants somewhere else.

Does she know how far along she is op? And does she know what she wants to do? This must be a huge shock for both of you

You must be stunned. The first thing is to establish how far along she is, who the father is and how your DD is feeling.

I would be strongly encouraging termination. And each day that passes without making a decision/dd refusing to address this brings the reality of her becoming a mother at the ridiculously young age of 14 closer and closer.

What a nasty attitude towards a shocked parent seeking support @Hairycooter

Horse. Stable. Door. Bolted.

what’s done is done. No point making judgements about whether she should be having sex now is there.

She’s not the first and won’t be the last. Find out how many weeks along she along she is and make sure she understands her options. Is there someone at school she can talk to ?

I can imagine what a big shock this must be OP. Assuming the dad is same age and that there was nothing sinister going on there I think all you can do is support her completely and be there for her no matter what that looks like.

Wow, way to make the OP feel like shit when she's come here for some help and advice. You do not know the context of this pregnancy. Take your judgement elsewhere.

That is beyond judgemental in this day and age.

She is around 16 weeks, she has said she doesn't want a baby and she doesn't want anyone to know she's pregnant. She doesn't want to tell the dad.