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Original poster

What do you think makes an ordinary looking woman attractive?

204 replies

Trainbother · 03/05/2024 13:46

To a man?

I've obviously been clicking on the wrong things because my FB feed is full of "do these three things to attract a man".

Mostly they seem completely bonkers, things like wear red.

It's made me think though. Obviously ordinary women do attract men, what kinds of things make them (us?) stand out enough to draw him to her?

I'm not really looking for hints 🤣 but I'm quite interested in the psycology of it all.

OP posts:
Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 09:35

TitaniasAss · 04/05/2024 09:25

I also think this is true and it's shit. Some men will have a preference for larger women but I agree that most men probably do not, regardless of what they say.

My ex DH says that he 'went off' me when I put on weight after I had my DC in quick succession. He said that it showed that I didn't care what he thought and should have made more of an effort to please him, despite the fact that I had two babies under 2 who didn't sleep more than two hours at a time. He was much more interested in me 5 years later when I had lost weight. He was a dick though, so ...

Show quote history

Yes my exh also got super interested when I lost weight. By which time I had seen him for the waste of skin that he was/is 👋

Loubelle70 · 04/05/2024 09:36

DoctorDolittle · 04/05/2024 07:03

I can only really comment on DP, and he’s in his sixties now, but he always says it was how I was bringing up my DD that first drew his attention….she was only a toddler when we met and I’d spell out letters on road signs and talk to her about swallows migrating or how you make jam when we picked blackberries…he gives me the enormous compliment that I reminded him somehow of his much loved mother who sadly died when he was at school.
So that made him first notice me, then he loved my (saggy, middle aged) bum, and my (saggy, middle aged) boobs, that I don’t wear makeup apart from at work, I don’t dye my hair, I’m strong, that I’m intelligent and pro-active like him. He told all his mates when he found out I could (and would) lift bags of potatoes or coal if need be - a lot of women do an “I’m so weak” persona way before health issues mean they truly are. I always say I don’t ‘need’ a man.
He’d been single for yonks before he met me, is very attractive and kind and I still after all these years together can’t believe the women around here who I believe are more conventionally attractive than me (slimmer, fake blonde, false nails, etc) didn’t manage to turn his eye.
Our attraction to each other was, and remains, incredibly deep.

That's beautiful ♥️

Kianai · 04/05/2024 09:36

Bit depressingly cliché but from what I've seen some of the typical characteristics are:

Longish blonde hair.
Larger breasts and a small waist.
Always smiling. And laughing.
Young. Or at least young looking for your age.
Acts classy but gives off an air of 'I will fuck you silly and nothing is off limits'.

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Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 09:38

But then you see long married couples who are happy and neither of them are oil paintings!

Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 09:39

More papier mache really.

Motnight · 04/05/2024 09:42

LondonFox · 03/05/2024 14:29

Do you want to know what makes woman attractive to men or to other women?

Men: slim, round boobs and but, relatively natural and not too short hair, natural make up and nails, clothes that fit and are quite classic, washed in last three days, smiling and nodding. Youthfull look.

If man is part of certain subculture he may like more specific "look", but above would not turn off any man.

Ah yes got to keep smiling and nodding so that the man realises that he is irresistible 😂

Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 09:44

Anyway bollocks, who knows! Just do what YOU enjoy and if you meet someone while you're doing it, great. If not, you've still done something you like. If you follow that you'll meet more women friends anyway who may set you up with someone they know 🤷🏼‍♂️

SuziQuinto · 04/05/2024 09:44

Smiling and nodding. Nodding and smiling.
I used to get a lot of "cheer up, darlin!'" from random men, whose expectation was that girls and women should be perpetually smiley.

Dollenganger333 · 04/05/2024 09:45

Surely London Fox is a man? 🙄 I absolutely hate men who shout 'smile' at women in the street. They can eff off - I'm not here to smile at them.

Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 09:47

Dollenganger333 · 04/05/2024 09:45

Surely London Fox is a man? 🙄 I absolutely hate men who shout 'smile' at women in the street. They can eff off - I'm not here to smile at them.

And it's so stupid! What if your dog has just died! What's wrong with good morning instead.

SuziQuinto · 04/05/2024 09:47

Dollenganger333 · 04/05/2024 09:45

Surely London Fox is a man? 🙄 I absolutely hate men who shout 'smile' at women in the street. They can eff off - I'm not here to smile at them.

They think you are though. You have to look passive and sweet.
Heaven forfend that you may not be in the mood to smile at every man.

KnitFastDieWarm · 04/05/2024 09:47

Swagger. Seriously. Carrying yourself with confidence, but not arrogance. Dressing with confidence in your choices. Smiling. Being open and friendly. Being confident in your body and your sexuality.

Might not attract all men - might put some off - but it’ll attract the good ones.

Concernedforthekids · 04/05/2024 09:48

Height. Most men don’t like a woman that’s too tall. I think they prefer 5’7 maybe 5’8 and below. Also frame - my more petite friends attract way more attention from men than my taller, slimmer friends despite similar attractiveness levels in faces

KnitFastDieWarm · 04/05/2024 09:49

I’m fat and almost 40. I’m autistic and have adhd. I carry myself with confidence and joy in myself because I know what I’m worth. I have a wonderful partner but am often chatted up by men (and women) of all ages. So much of genuine attraction is about energy and vibes, not looks.

LondonFox · 04/05/2024 09:55

Dollenganger333 · 04/05/2024 09:45

Surely London Fox is a man? 🙄 I absolutely hate men who shout 'smile' at women in the street. They can eff off - I'm not here to smile at them.

Well OP asked what man like so I described.
Fact that so many men uninvited tell women to smile more just confirms what I wrote.

Rocknrollstar · 04/05/2024 09:57

Confidence, a sense of humour, ability to talk about a range of subjects, a good listener.
I definitely think not trying too hard to be attractive.
Men might be attracted to women who look like models but might not want to make a life with them.

SuziQuinto · 04/05/2024 09:58

LondonFox · 04/05/2024 09:55

Well OP asked what man like so I described.
Fact that so many men uninvited tell women to smile more just confirms what I wrote.

Show quote history

No, it confirms their entitlement.

NeverHeardOfSuchTosh · 04/05/2024 09:58

BoobyDazzler · 03/05/2024 15:31

Confidence, happiness, kindness, being funny, giving of a vibe of being a decent shag, smelling nice.

Basicially, the same things that attract women to average looking men.

"giving a vibe of being a decent shag" 😕

NewDogOwner · 04/05/2024 10:01

I think about Jennifer Aniston. If you look at her face without her hair around it, she isn't classically beautiful. Fit, toned, happy and healthy, groomed with great hair. She knows what suits her and sticks to it. She wears her hair around her face to soften her features.

SuziQuinto · 04/05/2024 10:02

NewDogOwner · 04/05/2024 10:01

I think about Jennifer Aniston. If you look at her face without her hair around it, she isn't classically beautiful. Fit, toned, happy and healthy, groomed with great hair. She knows what suits her and sticks to it. She wears her hair around her face to soften her features.

Doesn't she have fat ankles?

Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 10:05

Jennifer Aniston drives me nuts, she's just the same colour from top to toe.

Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 10:08

She's just gold all over, yuck. So is Beyonce, but Aniston is the worst for Goldfinger.

TitaniasAss · 04/05/2024 10:11

Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 09:35

Yes my exh also got super interested when I lost weight. By which time I had seen him for the waste of skin that he was/is 👋

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Oh me too - I left him not long after he made his 'I've gone off you and it's your fault' speech. I may have been at an all time low in confidence and it was bloody hard with two babies, but I wasn't going to let them grow up in a household where they would hear their mum regularly torn down. Best thing I ever did and I'll admit that, although it doesn't make me sound very nice, I thoroughly enjoyed telling him he had absolutely no chance with me when he tried to crawl back in my favour after I lost weight.

My girls and I did just fine without him and I met my wonderful DH 6 years after we parted. My now adult girls have always said he is their bonus dad.

Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 10:15

TitaniasAss · 04/05/2024 10:11

Oh me too - I left him not long after he made his 'I've gone off you and it's your fault' speech. I may have been at an all time low in confidence and it was bloody hard with two babies, but I wasn't going to let them grow up in a household where they would hear their mum regularly torn down. Best thing I ever did and I'll admit that, although it doesn't make me sound very nice, I thoroughly enjoyed telling him he had absolutely no chance with me when he tried to crawl back in my favour after I lost weight.

My girls and I did just fine without him and I met my wonderful DH 6 years after we parted. My now adult girls have always said he is their bonus dad.

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It's such a wonderful way of losing 13stone isn't it!

TitaniasAss · 04/05/2024 10:19

Neveralonewithaclone · 04/05/2024 10:15

It's such a wonderful way of losing 13stone isn't it!

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😂😂😂 Absolutely!