What do you think makes an ordinary looking woman attractive?

[Trainbother]

To a man?

I've obviously been clicking on the wrong things because my FB feed is full of "do these three things to attract a man".

Mostly they seem completely bonkers, things like wear red.

It's made me think though. Obviously ordinary women do attract men, what kinds of things make them (us?) stand out enough to draw him to her?

I'm not really looking for hints 🤣 but I'm quite interested in the psycology of it all.

Confidence, a sense of humour, warmth, bright eyes, a winning smile, good hygiene, clothes that suit her shape and personality. Well, that's if I was a man. Which I'm not.

No idea. But I do know when I wanted desperately to pull, for a few months in my early 20s, I seemed to get less attention than in my married 30s and 40s. I'm tall though and I think that's off putting for lots of men- including tall ones.

However, I did meet dh at 25, on a night out. He was attracted to my wicked grin and my short skirt. I had the legs to go with the height. I give off fuck off vibes, apparently. Until you get to know me.

I received the same compliment about my smile from a railway worker. It cheered me up as much as he said I cheered him up.

Ultimate it depends on tne man but I'd say human qualities would do it. Be the person you'd like to meet and you won't go far wrong. And take good care of yourself. If you don't no one else will.

Charisma and a positive outlook.

I think there's a difference between "I want to fuck her" and "I want a relationship with her." That goes both ways, mind you. I've snagged some guys I wouldn't want a relationship with. Being fun in bed isn't always going to make up for being incurious about life and so on.

So according to men I know (I work in a very male industry and have a hobby which is 99% male) figure- slim and curvy bum nd boobs, long hair, pouty and confidence

However - you see who they are with and they are not like that- as actually attraction is so much more

Confidence , nice hair , smell nice

Looking at someone attractive and spending time with someone are two totally different things.

Have you never OP, looked at a dishy man, but then had a brief conversation and slowly backed away?

I watched a YouTube video of a couple I follow. They're clearly very happy together.

They did a Q&A and someone asked "What do you most admire about your partner?"

Her answer: "I admire his dedication
He's so driven about achieving his goals. He works so hard and I really appreciate that he strives to provide for our family. I feel safe with him, he tries to take care of difficult situations so that I dont have to".

His answer: "Her arse".

I thought it captured the simplicity of men.

Seriously though, I think your average man likes someone fairly easy going who they can have a laugh with, and who shows kindness towards them.

I think something i did wrong when I was younger was being too matey/laddish. I treated men the same way as I did my female friends and had a great laugh with them but i don't think they find it attractive.

Have we walked in to 1954?! Smiling and nodding? 😂 Washed in the last 3 days? Is that clothes or body? Would hope it would be a bit more often! 😂

If you think you're ordinary that's a bad start.

Ultra femininity.

Sad but true.

I think a lot of these responses are what women want men to say. Men are generally a lot simpler than this. Attraction is a physical thing. An "ordinary" face attached to a decent body is still attractive. In fact, an "ordinary" face is still attractive because it isn't off-putting.

Your work ethic, fierce personality, or whatever, isn't what attracts them to you, but it does play a part when they're deciding if they want to make a long-term commitment to you.

Good hair cut. Well applied subtle make up
Well put together eg Scarves
Good bag and shoes

But most importantly I think is a big smile. looking fun and deportment. Standing tall and confidently

Unapologetically be yourself

I lm not necessarily uber attractive but have had no issue not getting male attention. Im 52 and still get it..to the point it's been quite scary at times.. stalkerish behaviour. A few people have said i attract men because im confident, happy and smiley...but tbh im like that with everyone, male or female.. men read it differently. Its not all its cracked up to be...ive had 3 obsessed men want me and its not nice. Just be yourself.

No man in the history of men has ever given a shit about scarves.

I honestly think the first post nailed it

And smiling and nodding is key, men love people thinking they're right

😶

No man cares about what shoes or handbag you have

This made me laugh.

The men who have found me attractive have never commented on scarves. They've liked my eyes though.

Men like it, in my experience, when you listen to them. Sometimes I do, and sometimes I pretend to. It depends how attractive I find them.

Confidence, sense of humour, intelligent and knowledgeable, comfortable in their own skin, their own sense of style, independent. Those are the sort of traits that tick my boxes in a woman. Men are not a hive mind and there will be plenty who look for almost the opposite of what appeals to me. Just be yourself. Better to attract someone who appreciates the real you than try and be someone you're not.

Oh I don't know. Well worn hiking boots and a rucksack that's clearly seen better days definitely make a woman interesting to me.

I could be wrong but hear me out...
Look at men that enjoy dressing as women or are transitioning to be a woman, they all tend to go for the same look ie low cut tops, short skirts, fishnets and stiletto heels with lashings of very obvious makeup in gaudy colours.
Surely it stands to reason that if this is the look the majority go for then this is what 'men' are wired to find attractive? Otherwise they would all be wearing low key, quality makeup and a loose cotton dress from m&s but they're not....
If you also look at the way strippers dress, it's very overtly sexy. Again, lashings of makeup, big hair, tight clothing etc. Basically look at anything with a woman being there only for a man's pleasure and it is definitely a certain kind of look!
Sadly for most men this look went out of fashion a good few decades ago (I can't really remember last time I wore heels!) but I bet if men had any control over what we wore the majority of us would end up looking like strippers.
I deliberately haven't mentioned anything about what personality types they find attractive, as long as the personality is packaged as above and is nothing too extreme I don't think they really care!

I've just asked a man I know he said black hair, pleasantly plump, big boobs, short.

I said what if she's really great and you can't get enough of her company but she's tall and slim? He said no, I'm sure she's great but no.

I think men are very physical in their attractions.

Another friend said soft face, slightly secretly slutty seeming.