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Original poster

A brilliant Rightmove listing

240 replies

catbla2957 · 27/09/2023 21:31

I live near this house and I have always wanted to see inside. Just wish it had a floor plan

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/140487803

It's also on a main road and not "in the heart of" anywhere

OP posts:
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17
Original poster
catbla2957 · 27/09/2023 22:40

I know if they went with a proper estate agent and dressed it properly for sale it might have a chance

OP posts:
MysteryBelle · 27/09/2023 22:41

Meh. The rooms are characterless and strange, some tiny, some like an underground church hall built in the 1970s in the USA during a materials shortage. The fake looking and distorted ‘castle’ turret tops not helping.

Agatha Christie would set this as the property of a mean, grasping old man with no sense of culture or style who promptly gets murdered on the first page and the suspects would be many as no one liked him.

LuluBlakey1 · 27/09/2023 22:43

catbla2957 · 27/09/2023 21:31

I live near this house and I have always wanted to see inside. Just wish it had a floor plan

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/140487803

It's also on a main road and not "in the heart of" anywhere

About the same price in Northumberland

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/135063674

Check out this 16 bedroom detached house for sale on Rightmove

16 bedroom detached house for sale in Milbourne, Newcastle upon Tyne, Northumberland, NE20 for £3,500,000. Marketed by Knight Frank, Edinburgh

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/135063674

BronwenFrideswide · 27/09/2023 22:43

My favourite is No.35 a picture of...wait for it...A SHOWER HEAD.

The Estate Agents should be ashamed, those pictures are appalling, several of the same room, same angle. Just dreadful. How they think those photos are going to inspire someone with that kind of cash to part with it I have no idea.

parameciumparty · 27/09/2023 22:44

They probably can't show all of the house because it's full of kink gear, poles and sex dungeon equipment.

It's only worth about £300k. I bet it stinks of sweat, cheap aftershave and lubrication 🤢

OhcantthInkofaname · 27/09/2023 22:45

catbla2957 · 27/09/2023 21:42

Much better- cheaper and has a floor plan

Show quote history

The hallway is bigger than the kitchen.

VintageBlossomHill · 27/09/2023 22:46

Oh My eyes!!

TheMarzipanDildo · 27/09/2023 22:46

MrsMoastyToasty · 27/09/2023 21:39

And an absolute steal! Albeit with only 9 bedrooms, not quite enough space for my liking

HowDoesThisWorkPlease · 27/09/2023 22:46

Ummmmmm Confused

HowDoesThisWorkPlease · 27/09/2023 22:48

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 27/09/2023 22:10

Why are most of the pictures just repeats? Same two bedrooms and bathrooms over and over (even if they e taken off the duvet and put a plastic forensic scene sheet on the bed)

This

Furryrug · 27/09/2023 22:48

The front of the house is a right mess , looks like a junk yard

A brilliant Rightmove listing
Mirabai · 27/09/2023 22:48

MrsMoastyToasty · 27/09/2023 21:39

Wow! Absolutely stunning.

DontLeanOnTheKeyboard · 27/09/2023 22:48

I think the ad is missing a song from the estate agent like that one in Dunstable a while ago, I will have a dig around for it.

TheShinmeister · 27/09/2023 22:50

Looks tatty and the photos are on repeat

ElizaWinter · 27/09/2023 22:50

MrsMoastyToasty · 27/09/2023 21:39

Ooh I love photo 14 of the Bristol castle. I can see myself swishing down that staircase in my dressing gown and away through the archway to breakfast.

Diggersandunicorns · 27/09/2023 22:53

Is it the hay bales house?

ArabellaScott · 27/09/2023 22:53

It's made out of lego?

Dizzydeers · 27/09/2023 22:55

Looking at the other properties the agent has for sale the photography is peculiar especially when considering the price tag of many of them.

It’s so bizarre to see such small bedrooms in comparison to the bathrooms. I can’t see through the decor/furniture to find a way to make it work.

therealcookiemonster · 27/09/2023 22:55

catbla2957 · 27/09/2023 21:37

I want to know why it has eight bedrooms and twelve bathrooms. Makes no sense.

that is what I was wondering too...

also, who was their interior decorator? they need an urgent eye check

terriblyangryattimes · 27/09/2023 22:55

There's no floorplan because the owner can't remember exactly where he put the rooms as he added them on every so often I reckon.

What a weird place, I haven't driven past there since covid but I know where it is and it's definitely grown since I last was near Crawley. It's right on a main road so reading it was in the heart of the town did amuse me! As did his faux-upperclass spelling of 'Beaubush' when it's actually Bewbush. It looks like the sort of place Katie Price might live in.

Give me the Bristol castle any day.

Alleycat1 · 27/09/2023 22:56

One word: Hideous!

Goreg · 27/09/2023 22:57

Those pictures are like haunted woods films where you know you've been past a particular tree four times but you can't get out of the infernal loop. And wtf is picture 24/5?

Original poster
catbla2957 · 27/09/2023 22:58

terriblyangryattimes · 27/09/2023 22:55

There's no floorplan because the owner can't remember exactly where he put the rooms as he added them on every so often I reckon.

What a weird place, I haven't driven past there since covid but I know where it is and it's definitely grown since I last was near Crawley. It's right on a main road so reading it was in the heart of the town did amuse me! As did his faux-upperclass spelling of 'Beaubush' when it's actually Bewbush. It looks like the sort of place Katie Price might live in.

Give me the Bristol castle any day.

She only lives up the road from it so could happen

OP posts:
Cockmigrant · 27/09/2023 22:58

Looks like my local brothel inside

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