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Original poster

If you were looking for a new partner tomorrow how many children/mother’s would be your limit?

202 replies

UseMyName · 08/04/2021 22:58

Mine would be max 2 children from 1 mother.

Would not be able to deal with more than 1 ex and set of childcare arrangements.

OP posts:
ShutUpAlex · 08/04/2021 22:59

0!

MeanMrMustardSeed · 08/04/2021 23:00

0, 0. Couldn’t do that to my children. Or to myself.

Thislittlefinger123 · 08/04/2021 23:00

None

LadyCatStark · 08/04/2021 23:01

...

Gettingthereslowly2020 · 08/04/2021 23:01
  1. Maybe one child at an absolute push.
AnneLovesGilbert · 08/04/2021 23:02

None. I’m a step mum at the moment and hope DH isn’t going anywhere but I wouldn’t do it again.

LadyCluck · 08/04/2021 23:02

None!!!!!

bubblebath62636 · 08/04/2021 23:04

0,0.

I had dd when I was young and always said i would never date anyone with children.
Expecting 1st baby with DH in June.

catatecheese · 08/04/2021 23:05

0! I actually wouldn't bother with a new partner and certainly don't want step children.
If suddenly single I would stick with my own children and the cat

UhtredRagnarson · 08/04/2021 23:06

Yeah zero on both counts for me.

MixedUpFiles · 08/04/2021 23:07

I think I could deal with children from one ex partner, but only adult children because my dd is old enough to adulthood at this point that I wouldn’t bring anyone into my life that had younger kids.

AlohaMolly · 08/04/2021 23:08

I would also never have another partner if I split with DP. Maybe the occasional casual sex but otherwise I’d never engage with the opposite sex meaningfully again.

LemonSherbetFancies · 08/04/2021 23:10

Well I would have been DP's 4th 'baby mama' if we were young enough to have had kids. He's the best partner I have ever had. Sometimes past relationships just do not work and it doesn't mean anything about the individual. We just met each other at the wrong time in our lives. We always feel sad about the fact we didn't meet at 19 so we could have skipped all the crap along the way.

TheWaif · 08/04/2021 23:10

I don't think I'd have a particular limit on anything, it would depend on the specific circumstances.

needadvice54321 · 08/04/2021 23:10

None

I've witnessed first hand the upset that can happen between a step child/step parent and NRP. DS had a dreadful young childhood, blatantly obviously treated like an inconvenience. I imagine it must be tough dealing with the balancing act of having step children, and I think there's some amazing ones out there, but I wouldn't want to get it wrong.

ThisMustBeMyDream · 08/04/2021 23:11

If I was to leave current DP - I wouldn't do it again. He has one child by 1 ex girlfriend and she is hostile as hell. Child is lovely, and I have no issue with that side of the role, and my partner isn't a Disney dad, nor does he leave any sort of childcare to me etc. But the ex... oh my word. She is awful.

But yeah, she has put me off for life. I don't want any more children, so I would probably end up single for the rest of my life. It is a bloody good job my partner is as lovely as he is.

TheWaif · 08/04/2021 23:11

@AlohaMolly

I would also never have another partner if I split with DP. Maybe the occasional casual sex but otherwise I’d never engage with the opposite sex meaningfully again.
I used to say that before I suddenly found myself single. You really have no idea what you'd feel.
Sweetchillidumplings · 08/04/2021 23:12

None! Don't want any more children and that includes step children.

00100001 · 08/04/2021 23:12

...

Lanaa · 08/04/2021 23:12

0 - I'm probably selfish but children would be a deal breaker. If I ever split with current DP I'll stay single and there's hardly any men without children now.

U2HasTheEdge · 08/04/2021 23:13

Zero, unless they are very grown up children.

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 08/04/2021 23:13

Well I have 3 but my older 2 dc are adults so only have contact with the younger 2s dad . I've never actually thought about it. Although I've only ever dated one person who had children and we never had children together

MintyCedric · 08/04/2021 23:14

I've been online 'dating' virtually since the beginning of the year.

There was one guy who had two daughters by different mums...one 31 and one of 10! He was really interesting and I have gone with the flow if it had come to anything.

In the grand scheme of things though, with a 16yo daughter, I really wouldn't be looking for someone with children that weren't 18 or older. I've no desire to get into step-parenting on a day to day basis.

yikesanotherbooboo · 08/04/2021 23:15

My DH was amazed when he had an affair and I said in would not have another partner. I had 3 DC to support , never mind myself and had no desire for even the tiniest amount of heartache. I haven't changed my mind.

Ikeameatballs · 08/04/2021 23:16

I think I’d only be interested in someone whose children were older than mine, ie lates teens plus.

DSS is 21 and lovely so this doesn’t reflect upon him at all, just that him being older and therefore in no way competition with my dc has worked out really well.