Answer the question above you. Wrong answers only. PART 5

[bearlyactive]

Previous question: When will bearlyactive start a new thread?

My answer: Give it a few weeks. Or months. Maybe she'll wait until NYE 2022 actually.

My question: Why are you people so impatient?

They were in the umbilical cord - massive design flaw.

How should I persuade DH to get some wine on his way in (that isn't sex or violence)

They are faulty
Should I get a chimpanzee?

You should definitely get a goat.

What is the colour of my hair?

Give your DH your last Rolo or failing that tell him you will offer his services as a Chimpanzee babysitter.
He'll then come home with champagne instead of wine.

Your hair colour is violet with gold zig zag balayage & a white stripe down one side.

AIBU to be cross with @iklboo for making me crave wine?

No, it is good practice in denying temptation.

Is it too late for crumpets?

Crumpets can only be eaten before 6am.

Will I keep a straight face while discussing blue tits and Great tits on Zoom with my youth group this evening?

Yes because there is nothing remotely smutty talking about Blue tits and Great tits
What should I bring to a virtual birthday party?

Snacks and booze for yourself.

What are you going to wear for the party?

A dazzling ball gown and tiara
Over the top do you think?

You can never be overdressed. I regularly wear such outfits to the supermarket.

How can you get a 7yo be even just a little bit tidy and organised?

Wrap them in duct tape & stick them to the wall

Curry & soup in the fridge or a Dominos for tea?

Curry and soup pizza
What did I miss in the rest of Ds school webinar today ( so dull)?

All the attendees turned their mics and cameras on and sung "Tonight's Gonna Be A Good Night" in preparation for the huge party they're planning.

Will you wake me up before you go-go?

BOOOO!!!

Did I scare anyone?

Yes my dog
Is it Groundhog Day?

No it's 'National Take Your Badger To Work But Stay At Home If You Can Day'

When will I get an email from 'The Weeknd' telling me his tour has been rescheduled for 3rd time?

This weekend
What will I dream about tonight ?

Being awake.

Will I make it to see Celine Dion in April?

Near, far, wherever you are, the love will go on.

Shall I shower?

No, a mud soak will get all the dirt and germs right off.

What’s the best way to get soap scum off a shower screen?

A hammer
(Serious answer... Apparently soap. )

Where did Cotton Eye Joe come from?

He was the man from Atlantis
Will I ever be warm again?

Yes if stop standing naked in the street & come in & put some clothes in. Your neighbours will be pleased too.

Why did the weasel go pop?

Terrible spelling & comprehension 🤔

Yes if you stop standing naked in the street & come in & put some clothes on. Your neighbours will be pleased too.

Why did the weasel go pop?

Because there was only half a pound of Golden syrup left. no treacle
Why did Polly put the kettle on?