Answer the question above you. Wrong answers only.

[bearlyactive]

For example:

Q: "How do you cook an egg?"
A: "Fry it on the bonnet of your car, especially in this heat."

My question to you is...
Why do storks raise one leg?

You don't jump you summersault off a cliff with a Olympic scorers giving you marks out of ten ,how do I get paint out of a carpet ?

Add red wine to the paint. That will get rid of it :)

Why do sharks swim and not fly?

Who let the dogs out?
Carol Baskin.

Why do we like the taste of alcohol?

They don't like heights.

How can I get rid of scale insects on my lemon plants?

Re the alcohol - evolved response selected for because it results in more unplanned pregnancies.

I really want the answer re scale insects.

Turn the plant upside down, hop on one leg & sing Chandelier by Sia. Voila, scale insects gone.

Why do birds fly?

Why do birds fly?

Do you expect flies to bird?

Why do stars twinkle?

Because kids keep telling them to - they only started doing it after that song was written.

How do lightning conductors work?

How do lightning conductors work?

By getting the train like everyone else.

Forgot my question.

Why are oranges orange?

Because if they were pinks they'd be pinks.

Who should be the next US president?

Because they really like Donald trump

And why not ?

Yes he’s great! So sexy, powerful and wise

My question:

Is the earth flat?

Not yet, but it is deflating because of all the oil wells drilled in.

Stilton or cheddar ploughman's?

Ploughman’s with vegan cheese

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Cause there was nought on this side.

What's your house like?

What's your house like?
The bottom of the feel blue sea.

If it wasn't you, who was it?

It was an itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini

How does the moon stay in the sky?

How does the moon stay in the sky?
Moon blowers. At any one time there are atleast 2000 people all blowing through straws pointing at the moon, the wind created by them keeps the moon in the sky. This is primarily the job of NASA but some amateur blowers do take part.

Is chocolate a vegetable?

Chocolate is a vegetable on alternate Mondays.

Why is a bucket round?

A bucket round is the one you pay for by bequest in your Will

Is there going to be proper rain soon?

Yes it will rain chocolate at 12:01 for 12 minutes.

What are you having for your tea?

Coffee

How many roads must a man walk down?