Drag queen at wedding

[wedding2021]

I'm considering having a drag queen sing at my wedding. What would you think if you were at a wedding and a drag queen had been booked to perform? Obviously they'd tone it down a bit with swearing etc.

@Mummyoflittledragon but unfortunately anyone could do this. It is not representative of all drag queens and is not common place at all! I've yet to meet a drag queen who is anything other than respectful of children etc.

There will always be people who have seedy intentions the same way some adults have seedy intentions doesn't mean all adults are automatically seedy and bad.

You can see similar YouTube videos of politicians but it's not representative of the whole of government 🤷🏼‍♀️

@grumpyorange you clearly have zero idea what you are talking about.

The men I refer to were well publicised throughout last year, and no, it wasn't just dancing.

It appeared to be dancing for the children (in fetish gear) to some parents in the moment. And then a little playing in the tent and pretending to be puppies.

The photographs taken revealed much more, not to mention their twitter accounts. Very revealing 🤢

But I've got to get on with my day.

Seriously, widen your mind and knowledge instead of blindly following the lets be inclusive regardless of women's rights and safety brigade.

@grumpyorange
The whole point is children shouldn’t be introduced to drag queens however respectful they may happen to be. I’ve seen some of the appalling drag queen clips. It is an adult entertainment industry.

Please watch the video in my photograph. The guy there was very very respectful of the children. However, he was telling them about numerous drag queens, all of whom most certainly are not. For me, that makes him the Trojan horse.

@crustycrab but they are not all seedy 🙄🙄 you can't tar a whole community over some people's actions.

I meant I have seen some appalling drag queen story hour clips.

Have it for your hen do.

Wedding- not appropriate and I'd think you were being to try hard.

@Mummyoflittledragon how do you know that OP has any children at the wedding?

Whilst I appreciate some drag queens can be inappropriate it is once again not all of them. As I've said politicians can be exactly the same!

I’d hate it because drag involves misogynistic stereotypes of women and/or sexually fetishised stereotypes of women. If there’s a stand up routine to it, I’d cringe as a host knowing that my guests who are women will be the butt of jokes in front of everyone. As a bride how will you feel for that to be aimed at you too?

It wouldn't be my taste in entertainment, in the same way an Elvis impersonator or a Spice Girls tribute act wouldn't be, but you can't expect to please everyone.

Jesus Christ. I agree with @grumpyorange
And the drag queen isn’t trying to convince anyone she’s a woman. She’s a character and a caricature. Drag queens don’t try and use the ladies’ toilets and anyway this is an acquaintance of the OP. OP this is not a good place to get opinions on this subject.

I'd leave the room and use it as an excuse to have a chat with Dh and other friends.
I don't see the appeal at all. I doubt he is that good a singer/comedian and I put drag in the same bracket as black face so it's a no from me.

Yes I would love, but it isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. Depends on your friendship group and relatives.

I don't like all this try hard.
If you want a different wedding go abroard, hire a boat, have a wedding out on a beautiful ocean etc.
This is just too cringe for me. If be expecting Freddie Starr to come in next with all his alternative comedy.

I wouldn't like it either sorry op. It is your wedding though and if you enjoy it and you think your guests would then go for it. You can't please everyone no matter what you do so do what suits you and your htb. Congrats btw 😁

You agree with the poster who thinks we should call a man "she"?

And any other thinking is absurd? How many steps do you think it takes from completely harmless to abuse in plain sight?

As for tarring a whole group with the same brush. These vile men were (and still are) allowed to pitch up, toys, puppies, tents and playmates in towns across the whole of the UK every weekend throughout the summer. And they did just that. Erections, sexualised play, fetish in full sight. And completely failed to hide their "preferences" on Twitter.

At an event which is increasingly advertised as a child friendly family affair. Anyone who says it isn't is a bigot. Now if your response to that is "oh ffs, lets embrace everyone. Live and let live" then I'd be very dubious about your personal judgement.

Weren’t the Black and White Minstrels caricatures?

And why would you refer to a drag queen as her?

@crustycrab but the whole of the drag community are not at these events!!!

No they might try to be funny but come across offensive to your guests. I wouldn't.

There is plenty of information that will explain it getter than I can.

Calling a man "she", as well as the ridicule of women in general to achieve this are 2 issues. Your scramble for inclusivity without prior research and understanding of what it means for our kids is another.

Weddings aren’t shows. If you think your guests will be bored watching you get married and catching up with each other you could; marry with no guests, not invite your bored friends, have a small wedding, have just a quick reception drink/afternoon tea, have the reception in a pub/restaurant/party boat, have a band do a barn dance/ celidh, choose a good DJ, make your own play list... there are many alternatives to having something that most people will ignore (because they want to chat) and some will find offensive.

Just no.

"but the whole of the drag community are not at these events!!!"

They pretty much are!!!

Not something I would be into. Most of my and dh's immediate family wouldn't really be either.

I'd much rather a decent live band/singer and a disco tbh.

It might be fun for you but tacky to others. I am not a drag afficionado but have been for hen nights & found the act lively & funny but in a bitchy cringey way....but def not what I would want for my wedding. Depending on the act, some people may think it is just crass & not appropriate for the occasion.

If you are concerned now & asking for opinions then you are unsure & this will make your nervous on the day itself.

If you just don't care what other people think or if they enjoy it or not, then do what you want.

But I don't think wedding entertainment should be a show or act for people to watch....you want them to get people out on the floor & having fun but not being controversial or the main event of your wedding.

The main event is you in your beautiful dress looking gorgeous saying 'I do' for forever...& your OH of course!

Do your research & get a good live band. The best weddings I've been at have had bands...with DJ coming in later if the band aren't playing late enough.

If you neighbour who does drag is a friend & guest, maybe he will get on stage & do a number...if it is that kind of wedding where guests participate...but then you also risk the drunk uncle warbling into the mic that bit too long...

As long as you do your research and get a good one, it will be very entertaining and memorable. Would you hire one for a couple of hours then have a band/DJ afterwards?
It depends on the type of wedding you are having too, you sound like you want a fun wedding, nothing wrong with that! Do what you want, not everyone wants a flowery, whimsical cupcake, type wedding