Answers to songs.

[Goldenbug]

1. Are Friends Electric?

None of my friends are electric. My toaster is but we're no longer on speaking terms. Anybody got an electric friend? Otherwise I'd say no to that question.

1. Do You Know the Way to San Jose?

I don't. It's in America/Mexico somewhere I think but for me that's a no.

1. Should I stay or should I go?

If I go there will be trouble but if I stay it will be double, so the answer is go. Basic maths.

1. If I Said You Had a Beautiful Body, Would You Hold it Against Me?

Some questions shouldn't be asked. #measwell

1. How Much is that Doggie in the Window?

Anybody know how much dogs are? Are dogs kept in windows more or less expensive than non-window dogs?

Does anyone know what time it is?

FFS. No one has any watches these days?
Just check your bluddy mobile then.

Fantastic thread!

Why? (Annie Lennox)

BECAUSE I SAID SO!!

"What you gon' do with all that junk? All that junk inside your trunk?"

eh...i'll get round to decluttering... one day... soon. maybe...

He was a boy/She was a girl/Can I make it any more obvious?

Did you just assume those people's gender???

Why don't we do it in the road? (The Beatles)

Well, because of all the cars for starters...

Voulez vous coucher avec moi?

I'm sorry, i don't speak French.

Suzanne takes you down, to her place by the river...

Don’t forget your wellies, it’s very muddy and you’ll ruin your shoes...

How many roads must a man walk down?
Well it depends where he wants to go.

Are you looking for a New England?

Yes if we end up with no deal.

What makes you beautiful?

A heck of a lot more effort than it used to!

Where were you while we were getting high?

Looking for the air freshener, love. That stuff stinks.

Are you getting any sunshine?
No, Lou, it's damp and drizzly here in Stockport.

"How soon is now?

In a minute.

Que sera sera?

Dunno. Never did Latin.

🎶What's the name of the GAME - (ABBA)

Scrabble.

Do we not sail on a ship of fools?

No, we're taking the P&O Hull to Rotterdam ferry.

where have all the cowboys gone? - Paula Cole

Such a sexist remark, women can do this job too! And I think you'll the preferred term is "Livestock Handler".

Sing a song of sixpence a pocket full of rye,
Four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened the birds began to sing,
Oh wasn't that a dainty dish to set before the king?

2 dozen live blackbirds in a pastry crust? dainty?? no love.

Two pints of lager and a packet of crisps please!

I'm not going to serve you two pints of lager and a packet of crisps, sir, because firstly, you're drunk; and secondly, you're standing at the counter of the Nationwide Building Society.

“Should I stay or should I go? If I go, there will be trouble. If I stay there will be double.”

You don’t need me to answer this. You’ve answered your own question right there.

“Why does my heart feel so bad?”

DiagnosisPro lists more than 440 possible causes for chest pain, ranging from acute coronary syndrome to myocarditis. Even if determined to be non-cardiac in origin, chest pain is generally considered a medical emergency and you really should seek urgent attention.

Someone left the cake out in the rain

Well bank holiday barbecues are always a bad idea

What's she gonna look like with a chimney on her?

Dead presumably. Have you considered getting a roofer in to stabilise the stack?

Do they know it's Christmas time at all?

If Christian, probably. If not then you might want to reconsider how you conduct your charity work.

Last night I had the strangest dream...

So no more eating cheese at bedtime.