Hilarious FB stealth boasts

[lovelyjubilly]

'I feel so guilty! I have taken my children out doing fun activities every day of the summer holidays so far for the past 3 weeks and today we are having a day at home. I feel so bad that they're going to be bored! Anyone else feeling guilty about having a day at home?'

Any other gems?

The opposite of these stealth boasts about wealth, are the reverse boasts about how poorly they are but still manage to soldier on

Like when my ex's sister posts about how debilitating the migraine she has right now is? The one that affects her vision so terribly.

I can't unfollow because it's fascinating but my vision is now affected because I've strained my eyes from rolling them so hard .

I only have nice people on my FB feed. And crochet groups.

Your ex's sister? Really why???

Redsunbluesky 😂😂

My niece, every filtered photo she takes has her Chanel bag in it, SIL says it’s a fake!

I hate the Valentines, birthdays, Mother’s Day, Christmas shots of all the presents artfully laid out.

How has nobody started on the making fucking memories brigade yet?

No your not making memories, your taking your kids to the park, forcing them to hold hands for three seconds off in the distance on the promise that they can watch YouTube for an hour if they behave, and let you get a good picture.

A relative posts pics of her weekly manicure with her Rolex, Hermes bag, enormous second engagement ring in her new Audi😁

When does term start? We’re going to stay in Italy another week!

I have one who, depending on mood that week, either nauseates me to the point I hide her posts for a bit or, perversely, I sometimes gain a sick sense of warped entertainment and actively seek out her posts. A lot of the above examples from PPs have me nodding cackling along

My sister does the making memories.

I didn't realise it was a thing!

Doesn't surprise me she's on that bandwagon though. 🙄

Another one that is obvious boasting, is when fb friends ask questions such as "does anyone know when (insert name of prestigious fee paying school ) 're opens after half term?
Or "does anyone know what the opening hours of (insert name of high end salon) are?

Just look on the bloody websites and there's your answer!

I find it hard to judge people who use #makingmemories. I think that I have one friend who uses it. I wish my parents had tried to give me nice memories

At #Centerparcs living my BEST life.
#familytime #makingmemories #feelingblessed #instamums #instakids #son #daughter #siblings #livinglifetothefull #love #kidsneedyourpresencenotoresents

Thank god I'm only friends on Facebook with people that I want to be happy.

That way when they post good things it makes me feel better, not worse. This includes people I was at primary with, why would you not want others to be happy, it doesn't take away from what you have.

Someone I know constantly posts about being spoiled by her DH and kids. Her birthday is at the end of Feb and she'll post a photo of all her wrapped presents neatly lined up and then more photos of what they are. Few weeks later it's Mother's Day and she gets an even bigger pile of presents.

Same lady also posts a lot about not being able to find her Gucci bag many morning (seriously darling the rest of us manage to find our designer bags in the morning why doesn’t she leave it by the Door?)

Ask her why she doesn't just leave it by the Dior
I shall get my coat.

Oh the #bestlife#makingmemories#loveyouhun#etc#etc#etc#.
I DON'T CARE.

I agree @gettingtherequickly

"why would you not want others to be happy, it doesn't take away from what you have."

Some of these soud boastful but many sound like people who are excited/happy and want to share it. Without knowing their minds, why not assume the latter?

gettingtherequickly

I do want people to be happy, and I like to see pics of people's holidays or new cars etc.
What I don't like are the people who constantly brag.

UpstartCrow

I find these annoying - The pictures of new trainers covered in mud from the 10k run they did that evening, or maps showing the route that they've run - "Oh I'm so tired now" and "my new trainers are so filthy".

Pictures of their kids making a mess whilst doing a craft activity, which really show off their new kitchen.

I admit this wasn't actually on FB, however, a rich bloke I knew was buying a house and posted a whinge online that he'd just had to pay [insert very large sum] in stamp duty. Not subtle enough to count as a stealth boast.

Actually on FB, my friend's sister posted a picture of herself lying on a bed surrounded by piles of banknotes. I'm not sure what message she was trying to convey.

Pictures of their kids making a mess whilst doing a craft activity, which really show off their new kitchen.

If I liked somebody enough to have them as my FB friend it would not enter my head that they were doing anything other than showing the kids doing a craft activity

"Just stopped off at xxxxx for cocktails to celebrate getting my brand new xxxx"

1 hr later

Pic of a huge meal, pics of driving car"

Anyone reported her for drink driving yet?

I have one who is very lovely in real life but toddler child is being made into some kind of hyper empathic, multi lingual (as in learning languages not spoken at home), anti-capitalist, singing, dancing, well-documented and photographed activist. A toddler.

I actually think most of the qualities that are not-so-stealth boasted about are lovely, but why not just leave the toddler to become themselves rather than hanging this big online presence around their neck. When said toddler reaches teenage years and wants to rebel, the only option will be becoming a Tory and then go onto investment banking, or work for a palm oil company!

I do wonder if the parent who posts all this is making up for something in themselves, because it seems so odd, so OTT. Or if they actually believe there is no child better than theirs, because we don't all set up web pages listing the wise and witty things our toddlers say, or upload daily photos of them looking cute...

#hatebloodyhashtags