Hilarious FB stealth boasts

[lovelyjubilly]

'I feel so guilty! I have taken my children out doing fun activities every day of the summer holidays so far for the past 3 weeks and today we are having a day at home. I feel so bad that they're going to be bored! Anyone else feeling guilty about having a day at home?'

Any other gems?

I have one who likes to post about dropping the kids at school and getting a Starbucks coffee . She always takes a photo of said coffee at the steering wheel of her Audi Q10 with her LV bag or purse in the background.

Oh no actually have one of these 😂😂

"So sad to say goodbye to my xxxxx (car) but Ive has it 2 years and time for a new one and I'm a very lucky girl as my hubby has bought me an xxxxx."

7 pics of car at angles, in drivers seat, keys etc.

1 hr later

Pic in pub with cocktails.

"Just stopped off at xxxxx for cocktails to celebrate getting my brand new xxxx"

1 hr later

Pic of a huge meal, pics of driving car

"So happy with my new xxxxx hubby bought me. He's wonderful. I love it so much we decided to just go for a drive and are now enjoying the most amazing food at xxxx restaurant we found"

What's most surprising is she is one of the loveliest people I've met who's extremely religious and unassuming and would do anything for anyone.
I honestly don't think it's boasting as he mostly stems from how lucky she is to have such a generous and loving DH - and knowing her she genuinely just wants to shout to the world about it.

One friend who will post things like 'only managed 20km run today #howwillieverbereadyfortriathalon etc.

another gorgeous slim friend who keeps posting about how she used to never feel slim/pretty/attractive enough but now has found inner peace and realises its not all about looks etc. - with an amazing photo. she was always gorgeous and knew it!!

both make me feel inadequate so avoid fb if i can!

I saw a corker on a good friend's FB today. Good friend posted asking for villa recommendations for a big family holiday next summer. NSSBF (not so stealth boaster friend) posted recommending a specific villa and posted a link. My friend then said how lovely it was and NSSBF responded by saying that she had hired it out for July and August this year and had booked it for July and August next year too So a really great recommendation for my friend then who wanted an available villa in either July or August of next year

I don't understand why they can't just post a pic of the view. Why do they have to include them holding the mug or wine glass with perfectly manicured nails. 🤔

(Name changed for this because if she sees this, my posting history will make my identity obvious)

All from the same person and all in just the past few weeks:

"Even though I have a 4x4, I had so much shopping that I had to call my PA to take some!"

Asking where to buy a swimming pool heater

A thank you message for her birthday presents, including the designer handbag, the trip to New York, the jewellery, etc

I love how these people think they're masking their boasting!

Not a FB post, but my favourite ever stealth boast was the local Dad who said to my DH that he’d caught his eldest teaching his middle child to read and, dramatic pause, “OH NO. Are we going to have ANOTHER early reader?”

I have one of these (friend of a friend). I press like every so often because I happen to know that her life is a bit miserable in RL (emotionally/financially/possibly physically abusive DH) and her kids and figure are literally the only things she has to feel positive about.

There’s a guy DH went to school with and he hate-follows him on facebook. The guy always posts faux woe-is-me status about delays while travelling to exotic destinations with work or how terribly stressful it is getting his solicitor to update him with house purchase things.

Yeah, yeah, you earn lots of money and travel with work and you’re buying a house. Just fucking say it instead of roundabout, attention seeking statuses, ya walloper.

School hasn't long started back here so there have been so many back to school pictures, including one the night before the first day back of piles of uniform and shoes, designer schoolbags, gym bags and lunchboxes. No kids, just all the stuff they've bought their DC for school.

A friend of a friend posted a shot of the glass of champagne she was having in the BA lounge, complete with the first class tickets artfully laid out in front of the flutes. And of course her Chanel bag just 'happened' to be in the background..,

The worst ones are the fully grown adults who post photos of their neatly arranged birthday present stash with #feelingblessed.

One friend who will post things like 'only managed 20km run today #howwillieverbereadyfortriathalon etc

I have one of these

These are hilarious!

I am seriously tempted to post a stealth boast on FB and see if it appears here

Not an FB boast but an insta boast

I follow someone who takes all her photos next to a coffee table (black glass and chrome natch), the coffee table contains three Chanel bags (the paper ones you get your make up in) sat between two faux gold bars

I have a cousin who posts pictures of her extremely fancy cakes and writes "just a simple cake to greet huby from work". She is lovely but very proud of her cooking and baking skills. We're used to it now.

I think that is lovely. When I used to bake I would sometimes post photos

I have seen one or two of the teen girl birthday present boasts via DS's FB. Perfumes lined up at the back, Pandora at the front. Cash splayed out like a fan.

Not seen any boy birthday present boasts.

'oh hun that is so advanced, m ine weren't reading until they were 23'

I don't think I'd notice loads of these - designer handbags etc in the Shot.

Ooohhh yes, a post I can join in with!
I’ve got a friend who just blatantly lies on Facebook and thinks people will believe her!
Today was a photo of her 2 year old who had completed a simple (as in not advanced) puzzle.
Next to it she had captioned
“Freddy completed this puzzle in less than 5 minutes. He said “if a job is worth doing, it’s worth doing properly” Not sure where he gets his sayings from”
Freddie is only just 2 years old, and when I saw him at a toddler group he said approximately 10 words and was definitely not reciting adult sayings 🤷‍♀️

Same person also posted “Freddie is fantastic at sport. His tennis tutor said today that he is an equivalent level to the 9 year olds he teaches”

I just don’t understand how she even thinks these will be believable. He’s 2 for crying out loud!

In all fairness to the same lady though, she has her 2 year old riding a pedal bike with no stabilisers. She hired a cycling tutor for him and he went for a 2 hour session every day for 3 weeks until he mastered it.
Now we have daily videos of this child cycling too!

The opposite of these stealth boasts about wealth, are the reverse boasts about how poorly they are but still manage to soldier on 😫😫😫

FB need to include an eye roll reaction alongside the like button

This is why I never have and never will be on FB! I am dismayed that this is socially acceptable!