I don’t get overwhelmed with life!? AMA…

[username68]

I have name changed for this. But I read a lot on here about lots of people being overwhelmed with life (which I’m not disputing that they do feel that way) and its demands in general. I just don’t feel this, I never really have tbh. Don’t know why this is so thought I’d do an AMA to see if there’s something about me that lends to this? Don’t know if that makes sense but anyway. So here I am AMA…

I don’t appreciate being told Im gloating or that something awful will happen to me eventually. Of course people go through those things. But bringing up the death of a child is a pretty drastic… considering I’m talking about daily life, not drastic situations.

The post is in relation to how other people handle it when everything piles up, and I answered based on the situation she described. Deciding which jobs can wait might help when you’ve got a lot on your plate. Grief or a serious illness is a very different conversation yet can be intertwined. I don’t see what bringing all of those worst-case scenarios into it adds, I would never wish any of those things upon anyone!! And yet somehow you seem to manage to wish nearly every drastic situation all at once on me. How horrible!

I think it's mostly personality/genetics that determines how well you cope with life's struggles. I've had a lot of tragedy and misfortune in 41 years, but always try to make the best of things.

I do know people who've had a relatively usual normal life and they've gone off the rails over something.

My outlook is you've just got to get on with it.

What's your social life like?

How much screen time do your DC have?

Those worst case scenarios are daily life for lots of people on here. People are trying to get through to you how tone deaf your thread is

People with supportive grandparents generally have a completely different parenting experience than people without a village.

I'm a working single mum to SEN DC in unstable housing with an ancient slightly dodgy car after years of rural public transport (yes I did all the right things, in the correct MN approved order, yet here I am, life happens). No parents.

I feel fairly overwhelmed, most of the time. 🤷‍♀️ I'm spinning the plates, it's all any of us can do.

Yep. 15 years in and we've had one night "off" and I can count on my fingers the times any family member has had them for any length of time.

OP, I think this is a very interesting thread. I would like to know how to become more resilient, because I don't think I am, really.

Do you ever feel any extreme emotions like joy?

Your thread is tone deaf and you don't recognise your good fortune.

Huge numbers of people are skipping meals to allow their kids to eat, for example. This is not a rarity but very common. People who don't have enough food will feel overwhelmed.

Debt, insecure housing, loneliness, being the victim of crime - these are all routine.

TIL: money and support and lack of illness/precariousness makes life easier to manage. Wow!

I felt resilient and strong until lots of really bad things happened. Namely lots of bereavements, my parents and brother. And three friends. One very close. My partner getting really ill. I now find small things like house repairs make me anxious. And I no longer trust that anyone I care about will be alive next year.

OP has an 8.5 hour working day. That's actually a little more than the standard working week, and she starts early at 8 a.m. I don't think her hours are especially easy.

I was like you. Easy life lots of help, easy kids until menopause hit. Now weight gain and brain fog has hit so hard! Taking steps to bring the weight down, doing lots to declutter the house so easier to keep clean and tidy but the brain fog that’s the hardest one to fix.

What’s wrong with that?

I don’t really drink, so I’m not really going out person. But I will still go out on the staff night with work for dinners etc. And I will call with friends houses and have people over for takeaways, I love doing this. I find a lot more intimate, and you can have a proper catch up.

As for my kids screen time they play a lot of sports so usually they do homework when they come home then get ready for whatever club or sports they’re going to. They will watch TV when they get home after that or maybe an hour max. The weekend they might watch some TV in the morning if they have nothing on like a match or scouting activity. It’s not really a fixed routine.

Yes, of course I do. I’m not a robot.😅

Can you not see that it is? Pretty much all of us that post on here are struggling with life that’s why we’re on here. Occasionally, some of us might post about a small win in life. But more often than not it’s because as I say we’re struggling in life so can you not see why your AMA has got people’s backs up? Even more so this time of year when we’ve got Christmas looming, which is another added nightmare for many of us.

I do recognise my good Fortune actually and I am very aware that there are people around the world suffering. There’s people living in warzones, I’m not sitting here thinking that they shouldn’t feel overwhelmed. I’m not that stupid…

I think most people don’t feel overwhelmed so this is a strange AMA. People tend to post when they need help and advice so that may have given you a false impression.

Your last sentence 🤔 ok maybe not stupid but clearly oblivious and even ignorant.

Sounds normal. And sounds like you’ve had an easy life. Real actual problems, come back then.

When you're dealing with X, on a step-by-step basis, are you able to tune out thoughts of the myriad other things that need doing?

You are probably just an easy going person.
Some people are more highly strung.

Yes mostly. I can compartmentalise once I have things written down in front of me.