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TTC for 1 year +

(808 Posts)
FlapJackered Tue 30-Apr-19 15:55:39

Does anyone want to join?

I have been TTC #1 for 15 months and had a MC at 8 weeks in February.
I am off to the GP tomorrow to try and get a referral to a reproductive endocrinologist.
Tried every trick and tip and old wives tale in the book to get a bfp!
It would be good to have a group of longer term ttcers to chat to.

BabySquid Tue 30-Apr-19 16:44:42

I'll join you @FlapJackered I've decided I need to come back on here for the support. I'm glad you've started a new group, I was getting jealous of people getting their BFPs after just a month or two on the other one.
This is now about to become the end of my 12th month, but as per usual, AF is playing games with me!!
If I go by ovulation (which was early this month) I was due af on Sunday, if I go by my normal 32 day cycle, she's due Thursday. 🤬🤬 sat here going a bit bokers tbh!! Tested on Friday because of my bffs birthday, BFN!
How are you doing?

579kirsty Tue 30-Apr-19 18:32:43

I’ll join you both too!
Been ttc for a year now after coming off birth control last April. Only had one natural cycle since then (in September) and a progesterone pill induced one in January. I’m trying everything to get my periods back but so far no luck sad

FlapJackered Tue 30-Apr-19 19:46:27

So good to hear from you @BabySquid
It's tough on the other thread sometimes as although the ladies are all so lovely a lot of them are very early on in the ttc process.
I would definitely go with Thursday and then that bfn would have been way too early so fingers crossed for Thursday!
I am ok thanks, I have taken the Soy Isoflavones again this month and now 6dpo. DH lost his oomph a bit towards the end of the fertile week as ovulation was being illusive 🙈 so I am hoping we did enough to be in with a chance!

@579kirsty poor you, that sounds really tough. What do the doctors say? Do you have pcos? I never realised how much the pill could mess you up until I came off it. My cycles were really long after coming off it. They ranged from 45 to 67 days. Luckily for me I started taking inositol and cut out gluten and sugar and that seemed to do the trick and they shortened to 30-37 although still fairly irregular.

@KatBeCool @daisiesandpeonies @cupcakesandglitter I don't know if you ladies would like to join here too? No worries at all if not x

cupcakesandglitter Tue 30-Apr-19 20:00:56

Thanks for starting this @FlapJackered and good to hear from you @BabySquid xx

I know it's really bad but I am really struggling to deal with all of the positivity in the other thread, and all the newbies that get pregnant straightaway 😩 happy for everyone but I feel like I'm watching everyone get pregnant and leave and I'm still stuck there. Six mcs/cps down now and I've had enough of all the positive "it'll happen" "just relax" etc. Nice to have a realistic thread xx

Bluebells2019 Tue 30-Apr-19 20:36:36

Hi everyone! Thanks @flapJackered for starting this thread. Can I join?

I'm coming up to 18months of TTC #1 and losing hope. Went to the GP a couple of months ago and was referred for tests. Have had blood tests for FSH and AMH levels. DH has had his SA... Nothing seems to be wrong, it's 'unexplained' at the moment so advice is to just keep trying and come back in another 6 months.
It's just so hard to be positive sometimes. Any advice/tips to share? Feel like I've tried everything going - smep, preseed, grapefruit juice even 🙄....!!

MuddyElephant Tue 30-Apr-19 20:47:56

Hi. Can I join too please? TTC#1 and on cycle 14. No sniff of a BFP and finding it hard. My periods have been really weird for about 9 months (gone from v heavy and clotted bright red blood to pretty much non existent and light brown blood) which doesn't help! Had day 2 and 21 tests last summer due to period issue and were fine. Had them done again last month and TV ultrasound, where the lady performing it commented I had a thicker lining and larger than expected for the day of my cycle. DH given his sample for SA a couple of weeks ago too. The waiting for results is driving me crazy....couldn't get a GP appt until 17th. GP said not to worry for 6 months but at the scan they said push for referral due to my age (34 in july) due to waiting times etc. Thanks if you've got this far!

BabySquid Tue 30-Apr-19 20:51:04

@cupcakesandglitter I completely agree with you, it's hard to be positive. I think the worst thing to hear is 'at least you know you can get pregnant!' STFU!! Or 'stop stressing it makes it worse!'
How the heck can you stop stressing or thinking about it when it goes on in your body, and you can feel every little twinge and ache.

579kirsty Tue 30-Apr-19 20:57:51

@flapJackered - same, I will never go back on the pill again. I do think drs should warn you about the negative side of it when you go on it. I’ve had tests etc and everything came back normal so they reckon it’s post pill amenorrhea - basically they keep telling me to wait which is obviously not what you want to hear when ttc!

@Bluebells2019 I’m with you girl! Trying everything too ... I’ve recently started reflexology as I’ve heard a lot of good things! Have you tried it?

cupcakesandglitter Tue 30-Apr-19 20:58:08

@BabySquid tell me about it. I've had every single symptom of pregnancy, I'm not regular, no idea wtf is going on - but yeah, relaxing and knowing I can at least get pregnant makes me feel loads better 🙄

@Bluebells2019 I have nothing sorry, I've not had anything I've done that's worked really 😩

Same goes for you @MuddyElephant sorry xxx

FlapJackered Tue 30-Apr-19 21:16:49

@cupcakesandglitter I have literally been told both of those things by a friend in a matter of minutes today! I know people are just trying to be positive but it is really unhelpful.
I am sorry I didn't realise you had had so many mcs/cps. Where are you at with the docs at the moment?

Welcome @Bluebells2019 Ah good old unexplained infertility! So helpful isn't it!
The only thing that I think worked for me was Soy Isoflavones on days 3-7 of the cycle. I got a bfp but sadly mc'd at 8 weeks. I can't be sure it was that which did the job but my opks were much darker which looked positive. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I am trying it again this cycle.🤞🏻
I do grapefruit juice and Brazil nuts too 🙈

@MuddyElephant welcome! Fingers crossed your DHs results come back ok and you get a referral soon. I think the trouble is most GPs are not fertility experts and so unless something shows on the limited blood tests they do then they assume everything is fine. 🙄 I am going to beg for a referral tomorrow at my appointment.

@579kirsty Exactly! I was put on it when I was 16 for my skin, no warnings at all that it might cause problems. That must be frustrating for you that they won't look into it further, will the GPs not refer you to a specialist?

MuddyElephant Tue 30-Apr-19 21:19:38

@babysquid @cupcakesandglitter I know what you mean! The most unhelpful thing anyone can say angry

MuddyElephant Tue 30-Apr-19 21:21:13

@flapjackered thanks for the tip! Hope your appt goes ok tomorrow and they refer you

cupcakesandglitter Tue 30-Apr-19 21:28:38

@FlapJackered that's okay, I didn't mention them in the other thread because mine have been since I was a teenager and only one has been when we're TTC I guess, I don't want to downplay anyone else's at all - waiting for DH's SA and then gonna take it from there. Getting fed up but I don't want to rush the doctors anymore, my mental health is declining every time my period turns up so I need to watch myself and DH too xx

@MuddyElephant @FlapJackered my GP is pretty useless with fertility too tbh - I think that's why everyone gets told genetic stuff from GPs (another irritating thing 😂) x

cupcakesandglitter Tue 30-Apr-19 21:29:25

@FlapJackered forgot about your appt tomorrow sorry - how did the fertility nutritionist go? X

579kirsty Tue 30-Apr-19 21:37:57

@flapJackered yes that’s exactly the same reason as me! My skin was awful so I’ve always been on quite a strong pill. There should be a limit for the time your on it I think. No they won’t refer us or do anything yet, they keep telling me to wait and come back in 3 months, or 6 months. We’re going on holiday in June so I’m planning on making an appointment after that and go from there. It’s got to the point where I’m not leaving the appointment without Some sort of plan of action!
I’ve been having reflexology, I’ve only done 2 sessions but my boobs are getting big lol! Don’t know if it’s just coincidence or not but we will see! Have you tried it or acupuncture to help you?

Bluebells2019 Tue 30-Apr-19 22:54:27

Welcome @muddyelephant - good luck with your GP.

Hi @579kirsty, haven't tried reflexology yet but am having accupunture. Quite enjoying it although hasn't resulted in anything yet! It did help to shorten my cycles back to their usual 28/29 days (they were getting longer and longer last summer - up to 35 days). How's reflexology going?

@flapJackered - sorry to hear about your MC. Haven't heard of that but will check it out. I feel like unexplained is the most frustrating thing as there's literally nothing you can do. DH feels positive about it because at least we know there's nothing wrong but I'm then thinking 'why isn't it happening then?!'. The fertility clinic also says that if it's unexplained they cannot offer any ART options until you've been ttc for 3yrs 😲. Hoping it doesn't come to that fingers crossed.

FlapJackered Wed 01-May-19 08:47:16

@cupcakesandglitter I know what you mean, I feel like a completely different person to the one that started ttc. Have you thought about counselling? I have just had a session and i think it did help.
The nutritionist was good, she basically said, stay off sugar and gluten as they disrupt the hormonal balance. Take fish oil, a multi vit, vit d and inositol. She also said the folic acid in the multi vit or separate should be methylfolate as apparently it is more easily absorbed and not everyone absorbs regular folic acid.

@579kirsty I would definitely push them on it, it is obvious something isn't right with your cycle and you have waited long enough.
I did reflexology for a while, which I think did help for a bit but I was spending so much money and not getting pregnant so I gave it up. I tried acupuncture ages ago and it really hurt for some reason which put me off going again, but I might try it again with a different person. Have you tried acupuncture? I have heard good things about it regulating cycles.

@Bluebells2019 3 years! I hope it's not the same here. I don't think I could keep on trying for another year. 😩

Newbie21 Wed 01-May-19 09:09:43

Hi ladies, can I join? I do have a DS (he'll be 3 in July) but I've been TTC #2 since last Jan - I've had 2 MMCs and 1 CP and I've finally got my referral for recurrent MC. However since last MMC in Nov my cycles have gone crazy - I do seem to ovulate but I spot from DPO 7-11 (it varies) and luteal phase is shortening.

Anyway, I'm fed up - I don't want to hear - be grateful for what you have - of course I am but it still hurts - or - at least you fall pregnant or don't stress.

I totally get where you are all coming from. My main difference is I haven't been on the pill for the best part of 10 years. I had problems with it so used condoms instead. I definitely agree that the issues that the pill can cause with conception is not talked about enough. I think maybe after ladies have been on the pill for a few years Drs should require a review to see whether it makes sense to have a break from it etc. I'm no dr so maybe that is a bad idea but I really think there is a lack of communication of issues.

I hope things start looking up for all of us.

LifeOfRiley63 Wed 01-May-19 09:24:29

Can I join the club?
We've been TTC 18 months.
After coming off Cerelle it took 4 months for my initial bleed. My cycles were long but the last 6 months they've been 28-29 days.
I'm now 10 days late and getting nothing but negative tests which is driving me up the wall. I have symptoms of pregnancy but worried they're all in my head.
I was referred to our local fertility clinic at Xmas and due to my high BMI they told me to bugger off, lose 4 stone and then they'll do a scan on my lady garden to see if anythings up.
I've got a phone appt with my Dr this morning to see if I can get an HCG blood test out of them to put my mind at ease, as this is really taking it's toll on me mentally.

cupcakesandglitter Wed 01-May-19 09:46:42

@FlapJackered same 😩 ah okay thankyou!! That sounds really useful - I would do counselling but I actually had counselling for a few years as a teen, and I don't want to let myself get to the place again where that's my only option iyswim? Xx

cupcakesandglitter Wed 01-May-19 09:47:04

Welcome @LifeOfRiley63 @Newbie21 xx

FlapJackered Wed 01-May-19 10:57:00

I just had my appointment and the doc said she won't be able to refer me for another 2 years because of my mc. 😭 which also means ivf won't be available for another 2 years if we wanted to go that route.
I think we will pay to go privately for further tests and hopefully something like clomid might help us.
Going privately do I go for a gynaecologist or an endocrinologist? I have no idea where to go from here.

Welcome @LifeOfRiley63 limbo is such a horrible place to be. I am sure they will agree to do a blood test. Fingers crossed you find out one way or another soon.

@Newbie21 I am so sorry for your losses. Have you had any tests done? I am no doctor but it does sound like it might be a progesterone deficiency?

I found these videos which made me laugh! So true!

https://youtu.be/-zX0szkR8LE

https://youtu.be/2PfAN20TAsI

bunhead34 Wed 01-May-19 11:56:29

Can I join?
I'm not quite at a year, but next month will be the month that marks a year of ttc.

Finding the other threads the same, everyone seems so positive and hopeful 😭

I've had scan and bloods - all fine.

DH is supposed to go to the docs for SA referral but is dragging his heels 🤷🏼‍♀️ ( although he does want a baby apparently)
I think all this ttc business doesn't affect him much. He's 31, but at almost 35 i can feel that clock ticking,

579kirsty Wed 01-May-19 12:36:34

@bluebells2019 @flajackered i looked at acupuncture but reflexology was the cheaper option. It seems to be going ok so far. I’ve only had 2 sessions so it’s still early - though my boobs have grown in size so I’m hoping that’s a good sign that my body is starting to do something!

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