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'Don't you have a boyfriend or husband who can look at that?'

(232 Posts)
buzzmoon Tue 17-Jan-17 08:58:57

angry boiler issues, and speaking to a plumber who says the above.

Sorry just because I have a vagina that makes me incapable of doing it myself?

AIBU, or should I have said F you!

Tootsiepops Tue 17-Jan-17 09:00:08

Whaaat? Don't tell me he said that to you in your own house?

JellyWitch Tue 17-Jan-17 09:02:37

What a knob? I do have a hausband but neither of us would mess around with the boiler - we're not engineers!

buzzmoon Tue 17-Jan-17 09:06:22

This is the second time too, absolutely fuming.
First was an electrician who said my boyf/husband could change the plug on my cooker for me. i was so shocked that he even said it i didn't know what to say, just very promptly asked him to leave! Changed the plug myself obviously.

But to happen again?! Honestly I've lost the will to live.

girlywhirly Tue 17-Jan-17 09:09:21

I think the answer to that would be "No, I would prefer someone qualified in gas safety to do it." Unless you are qualified, in which case he is sexist. Seriously, don't mess with gas appliances unless you are.

DrDiva Tue 17-Jan-17 09:47:03

We just had a dishwasher repair bloke who nearly fell over with shock when I told him that DH was the one who had done most of the dishes while the dishwasher was broken.
I gave him my stock answer "it's ok, he lives here too."

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Tue 17-Jan-17 09:57:41


Neither DH, DS1 (19 and fairly 'handy') nor I would mess with a gas boiler or electrics. We prefer somebody qualified in the field to do it, strangely!

For something like changing a plug, I would be much more likely to do it than DH! I have more patience and tend to be more logical and more able to follow instructions. I also put together furniture and do all of the decorating for the same reasons.

Your plumber would have lost himself a customer saying that in this house.

Similarly, DB was laughed at by a couple of his "mates" for having a female gas engineer/plumber. Because, clearly, a man shouldn't be relying on a woman to do "man's work" hmm.

TheTantrumCometh Tue 17-Jan-17 10:01:00

angry I'd be mad, too.

I had a flat tyre yesterday. Messaged my DM as I'd sent her a text earlier telling her what a good day I was having, and she replied, "Can your DH do something about it?"

Yes...or I could confusedangry

Floggingmolly Tue 17-Jan-17 10:03:21

To be fair, though... You did call A Man in (albeit someone supposedly qualified in what he was doing). You weren't "capable of doing it yourself", unless you're happy to throw your money away.

blamethecat Tue 17-Jan-17 10:03:26

Oh dear, firstly nobody in out house is qualified to mess with gas/boilers etc and secondly My Dp has no idea how to do anything practical, he can manage to switch the boiler from 'on' to timed and that is about the limit of his boiler skills. Are the people married/ in long term relationships I wonder ? Knobber.

Trooperslane Tue 17-Jan-17 10:03:46

I was buying a car.

Salesman strongly suggested I bring Mr Trooperslane

There was a stunned silence and I informed him I was perfectly capable of making a decision myself.


KateDaniels2 Tue 17-Jan-17 10:04:04

What was he there for and what was he asking you to do?

SaorAlbaGuBrath Tue 17-Jan-17 10:05:39

Rude. A bit like the workman who asked DP if I was always this nippy or if it was hormones (38 weeks pregnant) when I'd asked him not to make crude jokes in front of DD. DP asked him to leave.

NotTheDroidYoureLookingFor Tue 17-Jan-17 10:06:58

"So what you're saying is, men do emerge from the womb with fix-it guides and full trade certifications? Why am I just hearing about this?"

ratspeaker Tue 17-Jan-17 10:17:07

Apart from topping up the pressure NOBODY should do anything to a gas boiler without gas safety certificates.

Oliversmumsarmy Tue 17-Jan-17 10:20:29

Actually you aren't supposed to mess around with the gas boiler you have to have a registered Corgi engineer to deal with repairs.

Looked at new windows but refused to go with the company who insisted that dp should be there when they came round to quote.

I did ask them what dp would add to the discussion given I was the one paying and dp wouldn't have a clue what they were talking about. but they were insistent he was there.

I have had this a few times. I wouldn't mind but dp isn't even on the deeds of the places i buy

AnUtterIdiot Tue 17-Jan-17 10:22:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

everythingis Tue 17-Jan-17 10:23:51

Urgh I was asked this many times when I was a single parent.

This post also made me think about how I just let the very handy dp do everything like that even though I can do quite a bit by myself. Wrong attitude.

Lastly I've had some amazing female trades people in the house recently who didn't ask me stupid questions about my relationship status smile female gas engineer, drain unblocker. They were cool

SparkleShinyGlitter Tue 17-Jan-17 10:26:34

I think a simple reply of " Well if I or someone could look at it I wouldn't be looking to hire you for a fee would I ?"

I don't know what is up with people. Your a plumber/ builder, why would you do yourself out of money/work by saying can't your DH do that confused

Oliversmummy A few places do what you experienced. They do it so you can't say you want to go away and discuss with your partner as that is something a lot of people say when they want to think it over

WellErrr Tue 17-Jan-17 10:27:14

'Why? I don't know much about boilers, but I assumed they weren't penis-operated. Have I been wrong all this time?'

pipsqueak25 Tue 17-Jan-17 10:33:37

well had the op mentioned penis operated that would have probably just set off another stupid comment.

NavyandWhite Tue 17-Jan-17 10:33:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

amispartacus Tue 17-Jan-17 10:46:55

A plumber should be recommending someone to look at your boiler - and the idea is that the boiler person then recommends the plumber.

A plumber should not be saying sexist things like that. No good can ever come of it.

Mollyringworm Tue 17-Jan-17 10:54:36

If he honestly said that I doubt he is corgi registered - in which case you should report him to trading standards.
Also why would he turn a job down?

JackieMac77 Tue 17-Jan-17 10:58:57

I think you're being oversensitive, but that just my opinion. He's a plumber ffs...probably went to a regular comprehensive school and spends all his days working alone or with other blokes, tinkering with bits of metal. Not likely to be a Guardian reading intellectual who totally embraces feminist and socialist ideology. If he wasn't trying to deliberately offend or intimidate you, I'd let it go. Would be more upset if he fleeced me for something simple like an outed pilot light just because I'm female!

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