student university toilets

[cigarsmokingwoman]

DD is a 1st year student at a university in Scotland and frequently comes home (she commutes) bursting because she doesn't want to use the student toilets which are apparently all unisex with urinals. She tells me she wanders the building in vain for a female only toilet and even tries going to other student buildings and cannot find them. Yesterday she says she was walking around for 20 minutes before giving up out of desperation and using the unisex one. I wonder how many other universities are the same? It's appalling. DD will not complain or cause a scene but it makes her very uncomfortable.

You're the one claiming to be a midwife, aren't you? I'm starting to wonder if you're that cow who handed me a couple of paracetamol 25 years ago when I was almost fully dilated. Learn some human compassion.

"Pathological lies" seriously? A wee bit dramatic there.

I should have compassion for someone who worried their mother with silly lies? I do actually have a little compassion for her and that is why I am saying that her family should find out why she is telling these lies to send her mother into a panic. It is likely because she is struggling at uni.

I have more compassion for the mother who has been made to look ridiculous by her daughter.

I have more compassion for the mother who has been made to look ridiculous by her daughter.
If one of my children were struggling at university looking silly on an anonymous internet forum would be the least of my worries.
You do know that Costas have toilets, don't you?

According to the link Stirling provides to Mazemap.com, there are female toilets on

2nd floor of the library
2nd floor of the Cottrell building (including one by the stairwell and room 2B3.

There are many others identified but that should help for starters.

Who are these nasty people on here? Is it because it's the feminism board, we are attracting those individuals who want to come and tell us off?

Seriously, I don't think there is any reason to call the young woman a liar. As a pp said, men do urinate with the doors open. Hell, it happened to me at work. There's a disabled loo opposite the lifts in a small corridor and a man left the door open there while he was peeing. I was disgusted and I'm a fifty year old member of staff! Likely she knows it's gender neutral or has been told this, and she's distressed about it.

That's why we discuss it here in the feminism board because hey...women fought for the right for safety and dignity.

I'm really sick of the nastiness on MN and in society. It's getting worse.

And @cigarsmokingwoman does not seem ridiculous to me. She sounds like a mum worried about her daughter. She has not been humiliated in the least.

Lying to your mother to pretend that you are in danger of men waving their dicks at you instead of saying "mum i am really not doing well" is highly problematic. Mum has come on here saying something silly and has been rigorously proven wrong. It's embarrassing for her.

Yes i know Costa has toilets but since we have established her uni has perfectly safe toilets for her to use, she is going there for other reasons. That is pretty obvious.

It's been established that none of these things are happening in this university and she has fre access to single sex toilets.

No, she isn't the one who should be embarrassed, the people who can't help themselves and want to get a good kicking in on this thread are the ones that need to have a think about how they treat other people.

I'm thinking about the mum being lied to about a subject that obviously makes her distressed which is why the daughter chose it. If OP was the type to panic about drug use, she would be saying that students are doing crack in the lecture halls.

Jeeeeeesus @LoftyRobin you are one hectoring and tedious poster. You made a point but you're insisting in shouting everyone down.

I do not agree with you. Nothing is proven and this isn't a courtroom FFS! Why don't we assume that the young woman is feeling vulnerable or uncomfortable or unsure at the start of university not that she is a pathological liar? I know which sounds more likely.

Fed up with the derailers and gobshites I really am.

She may be feeling uncomfortable and I am not shouting anyone down, I am typing. I have been told to fuck off by users who disagree so I'd say it isn't my temper that is flaring here. The fact that she feels uncomfortable but then resorted to a huge lie about her safety says a lot about her mindset and values. I dont think sugarcoating how problematic that is helps anyone.

She was the youngest in her year at school, but is a mature young lady and certainly isn't struggling with her studies so far. She is just frustrated at having to search for a truly female only toilet space. Thank you to all who have tried to help and understand. I am stepping away from this thread now.

She is just frustrated at having to search for a truly female only toilet space.

Ifshe is seeing men in the toilets in Cottrell it’s because she’s in the male toilets (and that’s probably why they’re laughing) as there is no mixed ones in there. It’s only seperate women’s and men’s MazeMap will point them out to her, but as in my pp, there’s the ones on the right the minute she enters Cottrell from the bridge as well as many others.

I agree with @LoftyRobin you should dig into if she’s actually enjoying university, and if maybe it’s all a bit much for her especially as she’s young but also commuting in, it can be tough when you’re not making friends in halls etc. As maybe she’s hoping for an “out” to get out of going to campus.
If she’s nervous about toilets in general and is wanting empty women’s ones and is nervous something like 3rd floor or 4th floor cottrell women’s, which are always basically empty compared to ground.

Well as we established, there are plenty. It really sounds like she is struggling at uni and wants to come home and/or wait a while before joining university so said something that will make you run and grab her and take her home.

Are you struggling on MN @LoftyRobin - is that why you ran over to Site Stuff to try to embarrass posters on FWR by starting a ridiculous thread about application of talk guidelines, without actually following talk guidelines yourself - was it a cry for help?

Not struggling as I didnt make anything up, did I? I didnt lie about what was said to me like the student lied about their only being mixed sex toilets, so what evidence would you have that I am.strugglimg? I reported something true. There is a difference between true allegations, and false statements. You understand that, right?

You reported the post on here that you took exception to? When did you report it - before or after you started the thread on site stuff?

@cigarsmokingwoman
theres some strange people in this world, they all seem to love posting on this board. I would not concern yourself with them. As long as your daughter is ok, that’s all.
God knows I’ve contacted people upset about something and it turns out I didn’t need to be upset, there was a solution, or I misunderstood.
It was ok to post here, people were helpful I think.

Strange how LoftyRobin keeps complaining about lies but has no problem with the massive lie that men can become women. And we should all go along with this particular lie.

How many times do you need to be told that women being afraid of men in single sex spaces and wanting a single sex space - as is their legal right - is not about “men waving their dicks at you”?

She’s a hypocrite in my opinion. Look at some of her posts on this thread.

Nasty to a worried mother.

and nasty in tone.

and calls the daughter a “pathological liar” when she is complicit in the “pathological lie” that people can change sex.

Says it all really.

Starting a thread mentioning another poster the way that Site stuff thread did is bullying.