I blame JKRowling

[RedToothBrush]

For shrinking the size of Monster Munch and shrinkflation generally.

Also the existence of belly button fluff

What do you blame her for?

I heard she sneaks into peoples houses while they’re sleeping and puts a red sock in the washing machine.

Drinking the last of the good coffee.

The rain, just when I wanted to hang out bedding on the line.

I'm sure she snuck into my house and stole a bottle of wine.

Popularising reading again. I used to love a totally empty library and bookshop, sadly no more. Hordes of people, all enjoying books, everywhere! How very dare she.

My late-onset dairy allergy. She's stolen cheese from me!

For cool logic in the face of fire

I blame her for stealing my dads walking sticks every night

i also blame her for my niece getting very angry and breaking the bubble of the Steiner school as she was upset she couldn’t read the books. It was all apparently because her adult teeth weren’t out yet therefore she wasn’t ready to read ahead 10

I blame her for making me understand Doublespeak

She has kept me awake at night with her ridiculously addictive novels. Strike 8 soon.

She. Asked the rest of us look bad with her philanthropy and wit and just general awesomeness

Where to begin?
It’s definitely her fault that if I eat carbs then I immediately put on 1.5 stone.
She hid my car keys earlier this week.
She made me forget to send a friends birthday card last month.

Actually, I’ve never had one of those Christmas elves, but now I’ve got a vision of a cigar toting, super yacht dwelling Sindy (she is way too classy to be a Barbie) impeccable dressed, up to much mischief over the Yuletide.

Whenever I open a bag of sharing crisps she sneaks in and eats most of them when I'm not looking. It must be her as I only had a few yet the packet is empty. Again.

It's totally her fault that my 10 year old is here listening to the Prodigy and not Going To Bed!

I'm pretty sure she caused the Titanic to sink. Even though that happened 50 years before she was born.

Potholes.

She could be using her ill gotten gains to repair all the roads but instead she hires teams of cis-het white men to go out making more potholes every night.

I blame JKR for making Tesco discontinue their smoked hummus. And she made Toblerone discontinue their coconut version.

Is she responsible for the demise of the dark chocolate Bounty too? Evil!

I blame her for my washing getting rained on twice in one day. I know for a fact she was sat there watching me hang it back out the second time before she switched the rain back on as there was a cloud shaped like an owl when I checked the sky.

She's mean.

She is on charge of all the roadworks on the A1. Part of a dastardly plan to try to make us use the Hogwarts Express instead.

I blame J K Rowling for pickled eggs. They are the devil’s work.

She sneaks into my house and moves the dogs favourite toy into the garden just before bedtime just to make my dog sad and have to go back at her.

She also are all the nice hazelnut truffles and put the box back in the cupboard.

Oh I should have read the posts first, she's done the rain crap to you as well today. What's with her washed bedding hatred?

She's clean-sheet phobic

She haunts Darrington, you will see her out of the corner of your eye as you creep slowly past.