Is there any future you'd accept for trans people?

[AYoungTransWoman]

Hello, I'm a young trans person who transitioned in my teens. I've been on hormones my entire adult life, have a GRC and will have Gender Reassignment Surgery imminently.

Is there any future you would accept for people like me who have gone through everything?

I don’t know what ID you mean, but unfortunately you aren’t a woman. I sympathise with your distress at this fact, but it remains a fact. I wish it were possible for people who really wanted to change sex to do so, but it isn’t.

On pronouns - These relate to how people refer to you when mentioning you to others. Nobody uses pronouns for themselves. If someone asked me to refer to them in a particular way when talking about them to others (eg ‘she’ for a trans woman) I would respect that, as I suspect all decent people would regardless of their views on trans issues. So hopefully you find that reassuring.

If GRCs are revoked, that doesn’t change facts nor does it change how decent people will treat you.

I appreciate your lack of willingness to use male spaces in the absence of unisex ones. I hope you appreciate my lack of willingness to accommodate males in female spaces. This is a difficult balancing act to resolve but if it does require a binary solution (no pun intended) then I will side with sex-specific spaces. I know that you will find that difficult, but choosing the other option will mean difficulties for a great many more people. I wish there was a solution that caused no problems for anyone, but there isn’t one as far as I can see.

Is there a particular reason you are scared of losing access to hormones?

I’m scared of being in toilets and changing rooms with men. I’m scared for my autistic daughter being in toilets and changing rooms with men. I’m scared that my niece will lose her place in her sport to a man. It’s not nice being scared is it.

Men are a real threat to women. Your id saying female isn’t a threat. Your body will be healthier without hormones it’s not meant to be exposed to so losing them isn’t a threat either. Not getting the help you need with your mental health and therefore taking hormones and having unnecessary, dangerous surgery is the biggest threat you face and what you should be very scared of.

I wish for you some intensive therapy so that you can cope with the adversities that you will face in life from all aspects.

Including accepting that a GRC never gave you permission to access all female single sex provisions, there were always exceptions allowed. And that not one person on this earth has to use your preferred language and the labels you want people to use.

Honestly do what you like
No one cares as long as you don’t affect the lives of others negatively
That includes
Using womens and girls spaces
Removing womens and girls rights
Data analysis changed to you desired sex
Imposing your thoughts on others
Imposing desired pronouns on others
Costing the nhs money
Hate speech on GC people

moving on….

The same basics I'd hope for for everyone else - safety, equal rights to housing, employment, education, good health and access to healthcare, happy healthy personal relationships...those sorts of things.

Beyond basics it's more specialist and by need / class and I don't want a future where male born people are in women's spaces or sports, no matter what changes they have made to themselves.

Nor do I want a future where anyone is expected to participate in validating or promoting a falsehood, or where those who object or challenge doing so put themselves at risk.

Do you think someone who is transitioning is safe in men only space? Could you not consider that someone presenting female could be equally as in danger from male violence or attack there as someone assigned female at birth?

Trans people just want to be safe, too. Pushing them into male only spaces is absolutely not the answer for that.

Want to hear what women are scared of?

Ahhh. Yes. Breast ‘enhancements’. Not genital surgeries and not mastectomies. Both of which can be life limiting even when done for disease treatments.

I'd like the OP to answer. I'm interested in what the OP has to say. Don't lecture me please.

ooooh boy

I know lots of people will try to reason with this poster, but sometimes people are just plain old wrong and can't be made to see reason. All you can do is try to make sure those with power understand that they are wrong and should not be indulged.

And I would suggest that this poster is an excellent example of such a person

Pushing them into women's space is not the answer. Maybe if they mobilised for their own spaces, they would get them. But that's not what they want.

Allowing men in women’s spaces is most definitely not the answer. This isn’t for women to solve. Use sex based spaces or campaign for something else but leave women’s spaces alone.

If men are not safe around other men, then that is for men to solve. Women are not the aggressors, and male problems should not be forced upon us.

Ok, that's where the line sits with me. Sorry that it doesn't work for you.

Your GRC doesn't change your sex. If you have F in your passport then it's a lie. You shouldn't be able to compel people to lie and say you're female if that's not how they perceive you.

There is no point in having sex markers on official documents if they are a lie. Either get rid of the sex markers altogether or they need to report actual sex.

If your hormone prescription conforms to prescribing guidelines then they'll continue to be prescribed for you.

It's not women's problem to sort out your issue with single sex spaces. Plenty of transwomen manage to live a full life without transgressing on women's boundaries. Learn from them.

Could you not consider that someone presenting female could be equally as in danger from male violence or attack there as someone assigned female at birth?

A man 'presenting as female' is never going to be as equally in danger from other men as women, for several reasons.

I don't really have to spell them all out, do I?

Then they need to campaign for spaces suited to their needs without making women feel uncomfortable or put in danger

Its very simple really

Did I say anything about women’s spaces?? No. I was replying specifically to why a trans person might not wish to be in a male only space, which I think is pretty obvious. There is a much greater risk to them there than if they had access to single use or unisex toilets.

You might have to..... 😁

Yes of course! Live your life in a way that is authentic to you, wear what you like, call yourself what you like and expect to be treated with as much respect as anyone else, as you deserve to be.

As long as you aren’t forcing yourself in to biological woman’s spaces, sport, or prisons then you do you.

but I'm tired, murasaki. So damn tired. 😭

As long as you don’t insist in participating in women’s sports or use women’s single sex spaces then you do you!
Most women are no threat to you unless you do either of the above.
As far as your health is concerned have you researched fully the medical consequences of surgery because everything I have seen is horrific but I’m sure you’re going into surgery with the full facts.

Why do those things scare you?
You say you know who you are so why does it matter if other people don't validate that?
How would your life actually be made worse by having your real sex on your ID?
You do know that most people will know you are a Transwoman don't you?
A piece of paper won't make any difference to that

I’m sorry to say that you won’t get what you are looking for on this forum from what I have seen. I say this as I assuming you want to be seen and accepted as a (trans) woman. You won’t get that here if my assumption is right. I say this kindly. I wouldn’t have posted on here. I’m truly sorry you are scared I hope your fears don’t materialise.

Again, the comparison does not mute my point. The poster asked why trans people would not be comfortable in a male only space. Male violence, and their increased risk of it, is the answer. They should not be pushed into these dangerous situations any more than we should not be pushed into male only spaces.

Oh love, with the greatest respect you've been sold a lie. If you think about it, then you'll probably recognise other reasons for your unhappiness as a child and the feelings of not fitting in. Have you been diagnosed as autistic yet and got good support for that for example? It's easy to latch onto a single solution for all your problems, but sadly this isn't it. The gender affirmation model does no one any favours when people go through a crisis of identity (as we all do). I'd advise you to just pause and wait, before going through further medical interventions, and use this time to focus on accepting yourself the way you're made instead. I hope you find peace in who you are.