So apparently I am a hateful bigot. Who knew?!

[NoChanceYouMetalBastard]

This has been playing on my mind since it happened. In a pub on Thursday night just gone. Very old building - toilets not great. No separate mens/ladies. Go through one door and there are 3 cubicles for all. Everyone has to queue together in this very small space. Big queue - a 6 foot 4 ish man with a beard wearing a flowery blue dress and lipstick, who was stood behind me, suggested that we speed things up by "us girls" going in together. I refused. That led to a tirade of abuse including that I was a hateful old bigot and it was known that 'girls' always shared a loo. Obviously he told all his pals at the table he was sat at, and they loudly discussed my transphobia until I necked my drink and left. It has been bothering me ever since! Just sharing/venting more than anything.

Better a hateful bigot than an altruistic rape victim.

I do think it was more that he wanted validation than anything else. Just two girls sharing a loo, like we all apparently do...

He’s a chancer and a right creepy fucker trying to shame you into accepting him into the loo with you!
What an abusive mindset he displayed.

Am well impressed you stood your ground.

I celebrate your bigot-Ness 💐💐
Did you by any chance luck out on being called a fascist or a nazi too?

Or an actual lgbtq+++killer?

I only had that on Facebook, which was scary enough, so I hope you weren’t. But it is not impossible sadly.

It is a well known fact that the only thing that two men can do that two women can't is to pee in the same bucket at the same time. Apparently, not all TWs know this.

I have NEVER shared a loo with anyone. YANBU to have not wanted to do this @NoChanceYouMetalBastard

Photo didn’t add

So I presume he still has a cock! So technically he’s a bloke. What is wrong with these people, it’s political correctness gone wrong, and it’s us women yet again that cop for it. It makes me soo ANGRY!

turbonerd - fascist, no! I was called a hag, hateful and 'a danger' by his pals.

Two sins here.
The obvious one.
And also, queue jumping.
That's so not British, lol.

Seriously, good on you. I can see and hoc policing by the public starting to become more common.

Big queue - a 6 foot 4 ish man with a beard wearing a flowery blue dress and lipstick, who was stood behind me, suggested that we speed things up by "us girls" going in together. I refused. That led to a tirade of abuse including that I was a hateful old bigot and it was known that 'girls' always shared a loo. Obviously he told all his pals at the table he was sat at, and they loudly discussed my transphobia until I necked my drink and left.

Interesting that none of his pals challenged HIM on his bigoted misogyny (implying that women are fucking stupid) and transphobia (implying that trans people are unavoidably bullies/weirdos).

I've heard the claim - not from actual trans people, but from "allies" advocating from within a dark paper bag or a dark man cave - that women somehow naturally and unavoidably go to the loo together as an argument against restoring women's toilets to their original and hard-won same sex status. Apparently transwomen who pass perfectly would be outed because they couldn't go to the loo with their women friends. I assumed they meant the transwomen would have to go inside the women's loo to gossip with the group and trade lipsticks, not that anyone was sharing a stall, but who knows? 😝

Yes - just like that!

@Babysharkdoodoodood ha ha ha NO! No way!

Exactly. It doesn't matter if he is wearing a dress, he is still a male stranger and who locks themselves in a cubicle with any male stranger?😕 It's not transphobic because you are not treating him any different to any other male because of how he identifies.

A restaurant in my hometown has that, too. Came in quite handy when I took my niece out for a meal but other than that it makes no sense at all.

The group of people he was with were all young, mostly young women. Although 2 of them went to go to the toilet after he had come back...

This. By the time you've hung your bag on the back of the door and sat down surely there isn't room for anyone larger than a small child to share with you anyway. Perhaps he thinks it what women do ,along with giving out tampons , squealing,crying and redoing all our make up. You don't need to 'perform ' womanhood since you actually are one. Good for you for saying no.

😂

I'll validate you, yes! yes! just later.

AngelinaFibres

Had it just been the two of us in there I don't know that I would have been so brave to be honest. I probably would have walked out and waited.

Christ. I can barely fit into one cubicle on my own, never mind having to accommodate female friends (the old fashioned kind) or large biological men.

I have been toying with the idea of messaging the pub but I don't think there is a point. The building is so old that I can't see how or where they could make provision for separately sexed toilets. (and people like this person would just use the womens anyway).

That was sexual harassment. Complain.

I would literally have told him to fuck off

@NoChanceYouMetalBastard, I'm with you all the way (although I can't say it at work).
But, I don't think it's the pub's fault - personally I would prefer single sex arrangements but that's not relevant to your scenario - it's the fact that this man called you out unnecessarily.
And yes, he is a complete weirdo for expecting you to share a cubicle with him.

I did say are you having a fucking laugh...

Putting the gender part aside one moment

what an odd thing to do to , women only do that occasionally with very close friends

not strangers 🤔