How to refuse to share pronouns verbally

[EthelbertaChickerel]

I'm going to a course tomorrow, and have just received an email from the course leader. This includes her pronouns, and I'm now concerned we will all be asked to share them verbally when the day starts.

If it is just writing them on badges, I will leave it blank, but I don't know how big the group is, and I am worried that if it is small, we will be asked to introduce ourselves and share pronouns. I'm fine with the introductions, just not with the pronouns.

What is the best, but most polite, way to shut this down? I have paid quite a lot of money for this day and want to get as much out of it as possible, but am not happy to compromise my principles.

TL:DR - I love the Mumsnet standard 'my pronouns are sex-based, like my oppression', and would be happy to put that in an email, but not sure about saying it.
Does anyone have any alternatives?

I haven't been in this position yet, but expect to be before too long. I think I'd opt for "I'm whoever, and I'd prefer not to disclose my pronouns" with an acid smile. If pushed as to why, you can just repeat "I'm not comfortable sharing that" until they move on.

I'd think I'd say " Actually I don't find declaring my pronouns necessary. Please just use my name".

I like that.

Or 'whatever suits'.

I would just introduce yourself by your name and just not say anything at all about pronouns. If you are pressed to share them, I'd just say "no thank you" and pass over to the next person.

I don't do pronouns. If other people care about them, I don't have a problem, that's their choice. My choice is that I don't care.

Just remind her that it is against the Yogyakarta principles to mandate pronoun declaration. Out-wokery is the only way to go as then she is on the defensive and you look very caring.

‘Hi I’m Monkey, use whatever pronouns you feel comfortable with as I would hate to compel the speech of others’ or I would maybe just flatly say ‘no’.

I'm Jane Bloggs, call me Jane.

I’d probably breezily say “I’m X, I’m female” in response, if we were going round the room. And leave them to figure out the bleeding obvious from that.

I find 'I'm TeeBee, please address me as TeeBee or Your Majesty' normally shuts down the bollocks.

“You only need to refer to me in the third person when I’m not here; and I’m long past caring what people say about me behind my back”

Specifically, Principle 6f.

yogyakartaprinciples.org/principle-6

Ensure the right of all persons ordinarily to choose when, to whom and how to disclose information pertaining to their sexual orientation or gender identity, and protect all persons from arbitrary or unwanted disclosure, or threat of disclosure of such information by others.

‘I don’t specify my pronouns, thanks.’

I paid alot of money for this course, please stick to the course content and call me by my name.

'no, thanks'.
'I don't subscribe to that ideology'
'I don't use pronouns'
'I don't think so'
'no, you're okay, thanks'
'whatever'
'just my name'
'oh, no'

There's any amount of polite ways to decline to participate.

Would it not just be easy to say "I prefer not to say"

Your name is all that is required.

It is highly unlikely anyone will press for them. Should they do so, then yes, I would say something like 'it's really not okay to press anyone into sharing this'

I prefer not to mandate the pronouns people use about me as I am interested in how others perceive me so I prefer not to tell them how to perceive me but to leave them free to use their own judgment.

Possibly adding…
I feel this approach supports a deeper and more honest interaction.

I would be concerned that by saying you prefer not to say you are buying into the nonsense, whereas some of the other responses show that you don't.

It depends on how you want to handle this, should it happen.

If they do the go round, do you want to object/comment? If not, will you be able to give yours and move on with your objective (the content of the course)?

If you're going to object, I wonder if you need to do it at the outset. If people state their pronouns, you are free not to state yours. Similarly, if you're invited. If however, you're asked to state them and you're not the next turn, you might need to chip in and say:

I wonder if we should remind people that Yogyakarta Principle 6f addresses the right to privacy. As my act of allyship, I shall not be stating my pronouns.

That way, other people who feel uncomfortable might feel supported.

This

If you don't want to do it but also don't want to 'come out' as blatantly GC / unco-operative at the start of a day you've paid a lot of money for I think this is a great idea.

Pronouns are in the eye of the beholder

I love this! Very succinct!

I would think that mot of the time 'forgetting' to mention them would be sufficient.