Gay men's magazine bullied into grovelling

[aliasundercover]

twitter.com/BoyzMagazine/status/1332052779871965186

Looks like they're gunning for gay men now. Anything other than complete agreement is no good.

Readers here will be used to this sort of insanity:
twitter.com/robholley/status/1332054419337334789
I wonder if it will wake up those who have not seen it before?

@notyourhandmaid

"Thirdly our enemies are the same, those who are transphobic and usually homophobic as well."

Except for the parents who send their kids to the Tavistock Clinic because having them be trans is better than them being gay, of course.

Or all of Iran.

Not to mention that 'homophobia' involves explicit nastiness about and towards gay people while 'transphobia' involves 'anything that deviates from the accepted orthodoxy and includes a lot of gleeful misogyny'.

"Firstly because trans and LGB people have always stood together in solidarity and been stronger for it."

There's always been conflict between the L, G and B, never mind adding the T in there. Women have not always been well-served by gay rights activism, despite contribution and support. The idea that the whole LGBT community are also in favour of women's rights and are wonderful feminist allies is something gay men like to tell themselves, but it's not true. There's plenty of misogyny there.

Agree with this.

@SophocIestheFox

If it’s not acceptable for LGB to have organisations that only represent them, and not the T, then why is it acceptable to have organisations (Mermaids, GIRES etc) that only represent the T and not the LGB? If the former is transphobic, how is the latter not homophobic? On what grounds can the separate provision be justified only for one sub group of an otherwise indivisible group, and utterly prohibited for another?

That apology made me very uncomfortable. And it still wasn’t enough? Troubling.

Agree with this too.

Spending one's whole Saturday advocating for more anal sex teaching in schools is an odd way to spend your weekend.

Who on earth is saying that? you are.

The argument seems to be that heterosexual anal sex should be stigmatised. No. but the male agenda that seems to be published regarding anal sex should be significantly reviewed and reality presented.

I repeat ... have you actually read and reviewed the tools and resources you and MBD were so keen to portray LGB Alliance as hateful for objecting to ???

It really seems from your posts that you have not.

A woman not wanting to have anal sex is exercising choice...

Yes, but a woman who does is exercising choice too.
They do exist, and doesn't mean they only come across that conclusion as they've watched porn or whatever and think they don't know any better.

jj1968

What I'm reading into your posts is that anal sex should be promoted as normal to girls in order than gay men shouldn't feel 'stigmatised'?

As someone on here said, they 'learned about lesbians from a dodgy video being passed around' ... well, unless it was purely lesbians doing the passing around none of them needed to watch this video to learn, there was nothing there they actually needed to know or that would enlighten them about their own sex lives, they chose to watch it because it was porn made for the male gaze

Yikes, good spot.

Who needs to watch a porn video to find out about the existence of lesbians, especially today? If you can comprehend the existence of homosexual men without watching gay porn videos (and I find women can), then homosexual women shouldn't be beyond a man's credulity

Those things are exceedingly rare and all human sexual activity carries a degree of risk of both injury and disease, I'm not sure whipping up homophobic scare stories about the terrible dangers of anal sex is very helpful.

It is common enough that there are surgeons that specialise in repair of serious injuries - sometimes life changing, and they have concerns that they are seeing more cases. Damage in this area can lead to lifelong faecal incontinence - do you think it wise to warn girls of the risks? The women that I know who have tried anal sex (because they were being young and adventurous and their partners were super keen) found that once was enough.

I think the majority of women DO NOT enjoy it - there is bugger all in it for them.

We are talking teens here, not women.

Any female who is allowed to develop and follow her own desires organically will instinctively centre her erogenous zones. The inner anus is not one.

Different for men, who have a prostrate. Different for adult women who have had plenty of experience and has reasons of her own to do whatever she wants.
. Really and truly, theres no need for adults to patiently explain all the different and exciting ways one body part can penetrate another, or all the wonderful items you can buy with your pocket money. Desire is enough to guide the average human. Teens need to know about safety and that it is supposed to make you happy. Not uncomfortable, or rushed, or used for someone else's agenda.

@Duckwit

jj1968

What I'm reading into your posts is that anal sex should be promoted as normal to girls in order than gay men shouldn't feel 'stigmatised'?

I don't think it should be promoted or stigmatised as abnormal. I think it should be taught about, with the risks of STDs fully explained, with harm reduction information given, with an explanation it may cause pain and discomfort, and even that it may be more enjoyable for men due to prostate stimulation. Also that nobody should feel coerced into it, that what they might have seen in porn is not realistic and that like all sexual activity it comes with a very small risk of injury and not everyone will like it - or should be expected to try it.

@Quaagars

A woman not wanting to have anal sex is exercising choice...

Yes, but a woman who does is exercising choice too.
They do exist, and doesn't mean they only come across that conclusion as they've watched porn or whatever and think they don't know any better.

You were responding to a post that proposed giving young people information (in depth) about it.

Your reaction was to think that if a woman decided that she didn't want to as a result, that her choice had been taken away?

Your post implies that giving people information makes their choices... less informed? I assume I've misunderstood.

Yes, but a woman who does is exercising choice too.

Isn’t this a discussion about teenaged girls? And sex education given in school?

Shouldn’t teenaged females be given all the risks, including being told they are NOT prudes for saying no to something they don’t want or feel coerced into.

A fully informed women making the informed choice with an experienced partner seems quite different to teenaged girls being told any harm is rare and all sex has risk when describing anal sex.

What is your view on how anal sex should be covered in sex education? All the risks? Or minimize the risks, ignore the fact that it is not pleasurable to many females.

And have you seen how anal sex has been written about in publications aimed at teenage girls? Actually read the information? Does it give teenagers the information they need to make an informed choice from those publications. One didn’t even get the female sex organs correct on the diagrams.

@TinselAngel

Spending one's whole Saturday advocating for more anal sex teaching in schools is an odd way to spend your weekend.

Indeed.

If the message given out to young people is that anal sex is highly dangerous, no woman would ever want to do it

oh grow up @Datun

I'm not the slightest bit interested in having penetrative sex with anyone so I've no idea what you think my agenda is supposed to be.

with harm reduction information given, with an explanation it may cause pain and discomfort, and even that it may be more enjoyable for men due to prostate stimulation.

‘Even more enjoyable for men’

How about ‘it may not be pleasurable AT ALL for many females’. No stigma, just the truth.

Among my female friends in the late 90s/early noughties it was like 'Ew anal, no way, lol' A few of my mates then did go on to have experiences with anal sex, but it was still very much like sort of drunken conversations about how it's not something you should do if you aren't comfortable with it and it kind of remained an 'ew' subject. Is there anything wrong with that really, among women?

I'm an old saggy tittied married hag now, whose husband has always known anal was off the agenda so its moot these days!

@jj1968

oh grow up *@Datun*

I'm not the slightest bit interested in having penetrative sex with anyone so I've no idea what you think my agenda is supposed to be.

Well I don't want to speak for Datun but my my guess would be: normalising kinks in order to erode young women's boundaries, thius enabling males to always get their way.

The odd thing is I normally spend a minimal amount of my time concerning myself with other people's sex lives. If asked before today, I would have said that I assumed in a world of 7 billion people, some women enjoyed anal sex and that was up to them.

However, this thread and the focus on how much girls need to told about anal sex is creepy.

I've just had a look at that Teen Vogue article that doesn't show the clitoris. It's even creepier. So there's yada yada yada about how to have it, what it might feel like and so on.

Then this. The writer specifically admits she's saved the cons of anal sex until last because she didn't want to put readers off. So she's not neutral at all. She's personally invested in persuading young people to try it. Why?

I quote:

Forgive me for waiting until the very end of this piece to get to this burning question, but I wanted you to know the benefits and positives when it comes to anal. Because there are many!

Yes, you will come in contact with some fecal matter.

I want to personally assure you that that you will not poop on anyone during anal sex. Sure, there are horror stories, but aren’t there always?

I don't think it should be promoted or stigmatised as abnormal.

If the recent stats stating how many young women have been forced or even just coerced into anal sex are to be believed jj, you completely are missing the female experience again. Why should something that is only pleasurable to some women (and I keep saying this, it is UNLIKELY to be teenagers with inexperienced partners) be normalized for heterosexuals?

Why shouldn’t these young females be told what to expect by way of risk/enjoyment and to be told that many many many women say NO!

The pornsick generation has just got old enough to be in positions of trust and responsibility. That's very dangerous for girls and young women in particular.

The 'lots of lube and go slow' advice is not going to avoid nasty injuries when an inexperienced, selfish or frankly misogynistic male is acting out porn fantasies.

It's consent and respect in healthy relationships we need to be teaching children, not 57 varieties derived from hardcore porn.

@Winesalot

with harm reduction information given, with an explanation it may cause pain and discomfort, and even that it may be more enjoyable for men due to prostate stimulation.

‘Even more enjoyable for men’

How about ‘it may not be pleasurable AT ALL for many females’. No stigma, just the truth.

I wouldn't have a problem with that, the same applies to many men. I think a core component of any kind of sex education should be that not everyone will enjoy the same things, what one person loves another might hate and thats fine and people shouldn't be expected to try things if they dont want to

And this generation of 13/14 year olds are ‘liking’ pictures posted of boys holding their hands up in a strangle position!!!

Please though, keep posting because the readers are getting a very good representation of why LGB Alliance is declared hateful for objecting to some of these educational resources. And clearly the lack of evidence about their funding.

Well I don't want to speak for Datun but my my guess would be: normalising kinks in order to erode young women's boundaries, thius enabling males to always get their way.

If people really think that the mostly lesbian and gay led organisations who provide RSE resources are doing it as some kind of elaborate plot to erode women's bounderies then I'm sorry but that is veering into the exact kind of homophobia that prompted the discussion on this thread.

You may not agree with them, but their motivation is clearly to provide honest, positive and consent led sex education that extends to non heterosexual/procreative sexual practices, not some sinister misogynist plot by gay men to corrupt the morals of teenage girls.

So why post this

Those things are exceedingly rare and all human sexual activity carries a degree of risk of both injury and disease’

Then there was

If the message given out to young people is that anal sex is highly dangerous, no woman would ever want to do it and its likely to cause all manner of injuries, but it's okay for the gays then that is likely to make young gay men feel stigmatised and also its just not true.?

You may not agree with them, but their motivation is clearly to provide honest, positive and consent led sex education that extends to non heterosexual/procreative sexual practices, not some sinister misogynist plot by gay men to corrupt the morals of teenage girls.

Oh no you misunderstand me. Not by men.