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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Bunburying into Autumn (Bunbury 6)

999 replies

DianasLasso · 09/09/2020 13:08

Bit like blackberrying, with added derailment, sealioning and general JAQ-ing off. I'll copy and paste the opening post of the last thread.

The useful Bunbury Guide to Spotting Community Disruptors is constantly evolving.

The best research and advice is not to engage with community disruptors and trolls. As ever, if you suspect troll activity, report it to MNHQ.

Remember there are people out there who would like to silence us by fair means or foul.

This is a continuation of the Public Service Announcement thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3944572-Bunburys-guide-to-community-disruptors-part-5?pg=40

If and when you see threads plopped into FWR, especially a curious repeat of well worn topics, maybe check for poster history before engaging. AS is your friend.

There are a number of posts/posters/threads that are reproduced on Twitter or Facebook to foment controversy using screen shots & flagging to either MNHQ to have threads or posters deleted.. Sometimes, it’s used to approach commissioning editors with ideas for articles. It’s a tiresome tactic that we always have community disruptor posters who themselves post the comments that they then highlight elsewhere as purported evidence of racism, religious intolerance, anti-men sentiments, or transphobia.

Some helpful links can be found in the ‘Break it Down for me’ and ‘It never happens’ threads but in essence FermatsTheorem recommended “that in the absence of a block/hide poster button, I suggest the following strategy (given that you're talking to the lurkers).

Do not name check the sealion. Instead, respond to a depersonalised paraphrase:

"It is sometimes erroneously suggested that blah. Blah is wrong for the following reasons (short and pithy). If you need more information re. debunking blah, here's a link."

Then (this next step is important to combat derailment) go back up thread to the last useful contribution to the discussion, make sure you do name check that contributor, and pick up the discussion from that point.”

Go well Witches gin

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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HecatesCats · 08/11/2020 23:03

I'm out. Shouldn't bother. There's a lot of it about tonight.

HecatesCats · 11/11/2020 22:17

Well this is interesting. My bat senses are all over the place.

NCone · 11/11/2020 23:27

Not touching that one.

HecatesCats · 11/11/2020 23:28

Very wise

TyroBurningDownTheCloset · 12/11/2020 09:14

Oh damn, I missed tea conversation!

Milk cancels out the taste of the tea? Yes, this is exactly the point! Grin

I tried PG Tips sans milk when my innards decided cow juice was the devil's semen. The tannin is way too much. So I got some rooibos. And then, courtesy of not having my brain switched on when making the first brew of the day, discovered it's bloody lovely with unsweetened oat milk.

Shame the male perspective thread went, I was enjoying it. Was interesting to see the names too - some I recognised, but it seems we have more totally silent gentlemanly lurkers than I realised.

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 12/11/2020 14:25

Shame the male perspective thread went, I was enjoying it. Was interesting to see the names too - some I recognised, but it seems we have more totally silent gentlemanly lurkers than I realised

Why did it go?

MaudTheInvincible · 12/11/2020 15:51

Was it the one asking if men on mn think twaw? Deletion message says it went off topic (or something).

Why doesn't Bunbury appear on my threads I'm on?

Bunburying into Autumn (Bunbury 6)
DadDadDad · 12/11/2020 16:37

Shame the male perspective thread went, I was enjoying it. Was interesting to see the names too - some I recognised, but it seems we have more totally silent gentlemanly lurkers than I realised.

I agree, speaking as one of those nearly-silent lurkers. I felt it gave me an invitation to speak on this thread, when normally I consider it more appropriate to be in listening mode. It was encouraging to see so many common sense male responses, and I'm sorry MN had to zap it - why can't they just lock threads and delete offending posts?

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 12/11/2020 17:10

Thanks maud

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 12/11/2020 17:11

And i agree with dad

I dont know they cant be frozen

Especially as quite often (not always) you get randoms ive never fucking heard of stirring so that the threads get deleted

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 12/11/2020 17:13

When one of my children threw a tantrum because they didnt want to play the game anymore, even though the other two wanted to

We finished the damn game...

With or without tantrum thrower

( it was dd...you should see how far she could throw a golf club at crazy golf, quite impressive)

nauticant · 12/11/2020 18:32

The AMA thread is doing a grand job of stirring things up and has pulled in all kinds of unfamiliar posters saying all kinds of shit.

CaraDuneRedux · 12/11/2020 18:41

Ah. Interesting. Being done for screengrabs, do we think?

This had dropped off my "threads I'm on" screen but I was presuming that was because I hadn't posted in a while (not being a tea-drinker). Will drink very weak Earl Grey (sans milk, obviously) at a pinch. Got quite used to green tea while working in China (but it never seems to taste the same over here).

In fact, I think staying off contentious threads might be a good rule of thumb for the time being, as I've had a really shitty time in real life over the last few weeks. (Not "woe is me my feelings have been hurt by people not agreeing with me" shitty time, more "beloved pets and even more beloved humans dying and crap, on top of all that, DS is in A&E thanks to a rugby injury - now mercifully recovering" type of shitty time). So my tolerance for woke wankers, goady fuckers and victim blamers is at all time low, and I am probably mere nanometres away from the ban hammer if I let rip on what I really think of them.

HecatesCats · 12/11/2020 18:45

@nauticant

The AMA thread is doing a grand job of stirring things up and has pulled in all kinds of unfamiliar posters saying all kinds of shit.
Isn't it just. I stepped away. I think it may have something to do with white privilege.
nauticant · 12/11/2020 18:47

What I'm seeing on that thread is posts being interpreted as "how racist!" so I guess screenshots are going into someone's Mumsnet is Evil folder.

Sorry to hear about for real life woes.

EyesOpening · 12/11/2020 18:51

How ironic that the Mumsnet is Evil comment is comment number 666 Shock

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 12/11/2020 18:52

Sorry to hear that cara

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 12/11/2020 18:53

@EyesOpening

How ironic that the Mumsnet is Evil comment is comment number 666 Shock
Um errrrr 😱
HecatesCats · 12/11/2020 18:58

Probably Nauticant, to be shared out of context.

ErrolTheDragon · 12/11/2020 18:59

I'm sorry MN had to zap it - why can't they just lock threads and delete offending posts?

I don't know - it's not for want of us suggesting it. Maybe you should try asking?!

HecatesCats · 12/11/2020 18:59

Sorry you're having a rubbish time Cara Thanks

CaraDuneRedux · 12/11/2020 19:03

Thanks all!

(Glad to see MNHQ are moving that thread to AMA.)

JellyFishSquish · 12/11/2020 19:26

(Glad to see MNHQ are moving that thread to AMA.)

Excellent.

SophocIestheFox · 12/11/2020 19:28

Cara Flowers

Don’t you get yourself a ban now, d’you hear?

CaraDuneRedux · 12/11/2020 19:38

Am posting on treehouses and shrew-o-phagia and such like. And have reopened the pub.