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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Bunburying into Autumn (Bunbury 6)

999 replies

DianasLasso · 09/09/2020 13:08

Bit like blackberrying, with added derailment, sealioning and general JAQ-ing off. I'll copy and paste the opening post of the last thread.

The useful Bunbury Guide to Spotting Community Disruptors is constantly evolving.

The best research and advice is not to engage with community disruptors and trolls. As ever, if you suspect troll activity, report it to MNHQ.

Remember there are people out there who would like to silence us by fair means or foul.

This is a continuation of the Public Service Announcement thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3944572-Bunburys-guide-to-community-disruptors-part-5?pg=40

If and when you see threads plopped into FWR, especially a curious repeat of well worn topics, maybe check for poster history before engaging. AS is your friend.

There are a number of posts/posters/threads that are reproduced on Twitter or Facebook to foment controversy using screen shots & flagging to either MNHQ to have threads or posters deleted.. Sometimes, it’s used to approach commissioning editors with ideas for articles. It’s a tiresome tactic that we always have community disruptor posters who themselves post the comments that they then highlight elsewhere as purported evidence of racism, religious intolerance, anti-men sentiments, or transphobia.

Some helpful links can be found in the ‘Break it Down for me’ and ‘It never happens’ threads but in essence FermatsTheorem recommended “that in the absence of a block/hide poster button, I suggest the following strategy (given that you're talking to the lurkers).

Do not name check the sealion. Instead, respond to a depersonalised paraphrase:

"It is sometimes erroneously suggested that blah. Blah is wrong for the following reasons (short and pithy). If you need more information re. debunking blah, here's a link."

Then (this next step is important to combat derailment) go back up thread to the last useful contribution to the discussion, make sure you do name check that contributor, and pick up the discussion from that point.”

Go well Witches gin

OP posts:
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YetAnotherSpartacus · 07/11/2020 11:28

I suppose in a way, there was an equality to a thread for men’s opinions being zapped for once

I think it was threatening to some ...

I think almond milk is actuall a medieaval recipe.

Winesalot · 07/11/2020 11:36

I suppose in a way, there was an equality to a thread for men’s opinions being zapped for once

Well if you look at it that way.... the male perspective thread and the ROGD thread.

IwishNothingButTheBestForYou2 · 07/11/2020 12:31

When I made my own yogurt I could make it thicker by adding powdered milk at the start. That's the only time I've used it. On this particular subject, nothing beats powdered h2o (just add water) very useful in an emergency I'll just get me coat..

ErrolTheDragon · 07/11/2020 13:12

Is there a way to start a new thread and have that conversation without breaking any of the rules?

Ask for opinions on dadsnet, and avoid discussing the 'except for relationships' question?

ErrolTheDragon · 07/11/2020 13:44

Actually, having just thought about it, I'd quite like to see a thread on dadsnet (or some 'bloke' site like pistonheads perhaps) which has a man ask the same sort of questions neutrally, and then just to see what answers there are without any women debating or in any way controlling the narrative.

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 07/11/2020 13:46

I knew someone who actually preferred powdered milk in instant coffee. He said it meant there was no pretence at all about whether it was real coffee or not. Couldn't stand it in tea, though.

DidoLamenting · 07/11/2020 13:58

I read but don't often post on Bunbury as I don't think it's my venue but why and when did putting milk in tea and coffee ever become a thing?

Milk in tea is particularly disgusting and changes , to the point of pointlessly cancelling out , the taste of the tea.

SophocIestheFox · 07/11/2020 14:39

I don’t get it either, Dido. The smell of milky coffee makes me heave. And tea is lovely as-is, just water and tea.

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 07/11/2020 14:41

Doesn't it slightly depend on the tea? Some of the heavily-stewed in a pot sort are only really possible to drink if you fill the cup up with milk and sugar (yes, Gran, I am looking at you!)

RedDogsBeg · 07/11/2020 16:06

I was just looking for the thread asking men if they believe TWAW, knew I'd find the answer here. What I'd read of it yesterday was interesting, opinions were direct, no mincing of words or tortuous attempts to be nice or kind.

I had a feeling it would go because, as another pp noted, of the breathtaking honesty. The watchers will have been incandescent as it totally blew apart their argument that it is only horrible, white, middle class, feminists who oppose TRA ideology and won't accept TWAW and that we are in a rapidly dwindling small minority. The thread must have given our two favourite contributors quite the shock.

ErrolTheDragon · 07/11/2020 16:29

The thread must have given our two favourite contributors quite the shock.

I doubt it, tbh.

RedDogsBeg · 07/11/2020 16:43

In the sense they are well aware but actively choose to use us as targets, Errol?

BernardBlackMissesLangCleg · 07/11/2020 16:47

oh blimey, no one actually believes TWAW of course, not even the people who actually say it. it must be so difficult holding a position you know deep down is absolute nonsense. so that thread won't have surprised the woke scolders one bit, since it just stated what they, and everyone else knew to be true

black tea is horrible by the way

ErrolTheDragon · 07/11/2020 16:59

I can't be doing with black tea or coffee - milk tempers the tannic or bitter edge. Perhaps the habit started as a western substitute for yak butter?Grin

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 07/11/2020 19:45

I still reckon it depends on the tea. Russian Caravan isn't at all nice with milk, and I am not sure about Jasmine tea with milk would be either.

Neither of those ought to be left too long to steep before pouring, which might be a reason. The tannin isn't particularly noticeable in them so they might not need milk.

HecatesCats · 07/11/2020 21:46

Lady Grey is lovely without milk and a squeeze of lemon

ErrolTheDragon · 07/11/2020 21:50

For sure, only black teas should be drunk white not green inc jasmine. I've not come across Russian Caravan - having googled I think I'll give that a swerve. We tried Lapsang Souchong once; I thought it was weird, DH came out in hives.ShockGrin

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 07/11/2020 22:05

It always makes me start humming a Doors number

and I do like it: a friend gave me some once and I got hooked.

DidoLamenting · 08/11/2020 02:42

@ErrolTheDragon

For sure, only black teas should be drunk white not green inc jasmine. I've not come across Russian Caravan - having googled I think I'll give that a swerve. We tried Lapsang Souchong once; I thought it was weird, DH came out in hives.ShockGrin
If you didn't like Lapsang Souchong you probably won't like Russian Caravan as it has Lapsang blended in.
ErrolTheDragon · 08/11/2020 08:44

Yes, that's why I mentioned it.Smile
Now the season has turned I'll be breaking out the chai - that's traditionally made with milk.

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 08/11/2020 10:09

DidoLamenting
If you didn't like Lapsang Souchong you probably won't like Russian Caravan as it has Lapsang blended in.

That's another thing that depends, though: some blends of Russian Caravan tea don't contain Lapsang.

I just wouldn't drink it with milk either way.

Do you add your own spices to your chai, or do you get it ready blended, Errol? One of my friends has a sort of tea-factory in her kitchen, with spices which she adds to her chai according to how she is feeling that day. She says it's useful to be able to do that if someone who is allergic to cinnamon comes round.

ErrolTheDragon · 08/11/2020 10:25

I've got some bought chai, but I keep meaning to make a spice mix to add to decaf for the evenings.

It's the black chai from Atkinson's which is possibly my favourite shop in the world. Fortunately they sell online.Grin

https://thecoffeehopper.com/shop/#category-tea

fatblackcatspaw · 08/11/2020 15:33

bunbury bunbury bunbury

mutters

feel very punchy today will a low tollerance for trolly trolly types... I have an FT weekend and tea brewing I know I SHOULD STEP AWAY

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 08/11/2020 15:34

Ginger is important. Sovereign against the bites of serpents, according to Galen -- or maybe it was Gerard or Culpeper.

FleetsumNLangCleg · 08/11/2020 22:57

What is it about bats and loos. So many bats in mixed sex toilets.

Ginger is magic. Chef's kiss.