I hope my daughter is a lesbian.

[RhinoR]

She's 10.

She says she doesn't like boys. That one day she will get a girlfriend. She says she has a crush on a girl in her class.

This has me hoping she will indeed be gay.
From my own experiences to those I read daily about young women being abused, coerced and degraded by their partners I fear so much for my daughter going through such things.

Women aren't perfect of course, being gay won't protect her from heartbreak and maybe some abuse at the hands of her partner but I daresay I would sleep better at night.

Is that terrible of me?

@Hearhoovesthinkzebras

I'm sorry for your experiences.

Now imagine your mother had been a nurse herself and found it to be a positive career.

You then express an interest in a nursing as a career for yourself.

Your mother feels pleased and hopes you do decide to pursue a career as a nurse as her experiences have taught her it will likely make you happy.

That is essentially what the OP was saying about her positive lesbian relationships and hoping for the same for her DD.

But that's all well and good once her dd has said she's a lesbian.

Taking the nurse analogy it is essentially what my mum did. Her career had been in banking and so that's what she was pushing me to do. Essentially pushing me to do what she had done.

As parents I believe we don't have the right to push our wants or beliefs onto our children. It's our job to support and encourage them in what they choose to be and do

I don't see the op is behaving any differently to the parent who suspects their child is gay but hoped that they will be straight.

She says she doesn't like boys. That one day she will get a girlfriend. She says she has a crush on a girl in her class.

The signs are there. Did you actually read the OP??!

Yep I did.

Both of my children, a boy and a girl, stated categorically at that age that they hated the opposite sex and the idea of kissing them was repulsive to them. I never took that as a sign that they were gay.

Both of my children, a boy and a girl, stated categorically at that age that they hated the opposite sex and the idea of kissing them was repulsive to them.

That's one out of three.

We seem to be talking about pears again

FWIW in my experience most gay people had an inkling they were gay by the age of 10. I did and it was similar to the OP's DD.

SapphosRock, and apparently, in a world where girls are still overwhelmed with messages that liking boys is normality, the only responsible way to parent is to maintain a weird neutrality about any budding homosexual orientation, and repeat, robot-fashion, that you will love and accept your child no matter what.

We wouldn't want the pendulum to swing from normality being heterosexuality to being too positive about perhaps being a lesbian. That would be terrible.

Well I don’t quite see the logic that an overbearing mother with designs on banking is really the same as the issue at hand. Employment is choice.

I think for children sexuality is something that they are not going to choose. It will develop. And to declare yourself pro or anti that is futile.

What remains then is residual anxieties about lesbianism. And those belong firmly in “your issue” category.

Of course not FloralBunting - us lesbians must know our place and not get too big for our boots at this rate we'll be demanding equal pay next.

floral

I got told that if talked to my son about being gay...that he would become gay

Talking about him being gay and saying that my children might have a boyfriend or girlfriend didnt turn dd or ds2 gay

Weird

Rufus come to think of it DD (4) declared this weekend she plans to grow up to be the Queen. I told her she will have to marry Prince George for that to happen... she burst into indignant tears 'But I'm not marrying a boy! I want to marry a girl. You said I can marry a girl when I grow up.'

Maybe I've given her the gay

I hope my DD is a cat when she grows up.

You might have sapphos

And if i had a pound for everytime someone told me he would grow out of it.....I’d have like 8 pounds

It’s twisted that an 11 year old would even think of labelling themselves pansexual. I’d be devastated if my 11 year old was even trying to fit themselves into a sexual category, like they need to do that to define themselves. Sex shouldn’t define anyone. Skill, aptitude and attitude should.
Then I’d ban the internet...

Wheres the pansexual bit?

I must have missed that

About page three.... should’ve done the @ thing

No its me guinea

Ive a memory like a sieve!!

This comes across to me as really creepy and inappropriate, you’re married to a man but hope your ten year old is gay. She’s a child for crying out loud, let her be one!
If she has a crush on a boy, girl or cartoon just let her know it’s ok and it’s normal to have crushes and big feelings etc

Cartoon ? 😳

@RufusthebewiIderedreindeer Haven’t you seen cartoon Aladdin?!

Jessica rabbit, anime characters, Disney princes/princesses etc

He has no nipples simon

There is something wrong with a nippleless man

‘Sides Flynn is much cuter