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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

I Believe Her

450 replies

Brittany2019 · 18/10/2019 20:51

This is disappointing :

I Believe Her
OP posts:
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6
JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 20/10/2019 22:35

If you go back to what the page was about and don’t even go near the trans issues you’ll find you’re not half as stressed by the page.

SunsetBeetch · 20/10/2019 22:38

Do they have any evidence to support their statement about the number of transwomen who experience sexual violence?

zebrasdontwearbras · 20/10/2019 22:43

Frothy, I can't believe you have blocked mumsnetters, who were there with you from the start - there for 'I believe her' - in favour of trans advocates.

FrothyDragon · 20/10/2019 22:46

@zebrasdontwearbras as I've mentioned above, they've been unblocked - I unblocked them earlier today. Blocking them was done in haste, and not my finest moment.

zebrasdontwearbras · 20/10/2019 22:52

Oh ok Frothy. Sorry I'm on multiple threads and I missed that. I remember you from the olden days of mumsnet, so I was just surprised at seeing you giving the time of day to people who say "women rape too". Because I remember you arguing vociferously against this back in the day.

I genuinely hope you are ok.

2BthatUnnoticed · 20/10/2019 22:56

Frothy thanks for unblocking, and I understand these things can be done in haste.

Gently, i note that you deleted and blocked a MN-er who linked the FOVAs report (which contained the voices of many women traumatised by male violence).

You did not delete, or block, someone who said “rape survivors are garbage.”

You only deleted that comment after women here begged you to.

I am now, very respectfully, begging you to consider changing the name to minimise the pain to rape survivors.

Again I can see the page has been a lot of work for you, and is close to your heart.

Creepster · 20/10/2019 22:57

I cannot imagine how used the women who were there from the beginning feel. My heart goes out to them.

zebrasdontwearbras · 20/10/2019 23:00

You did not delete, or block, someone who said “rape survivors are garbage.”

You only deleted that comment after women here begged you to.

Sad I am just so saddened to hear this. Frothy I just can't understand this.

2BthatUnnoticed · 20/10/2019 23:04

Sorry to be clear , in case people haven’t read the whole thread - the comment was “T*Fs are garbage

From the context , those “T**Fs” were rape survivors

But the comment didn’t actually say “rape survivors” it said T*Fs..

Sorry my comment was unclear , this thread is upsetting but I need to proof read better to make sure my meaning is clear Blush

FrothyDragon · 20/10/2019 23:06

The comment wasn't "rape survivors are garbage". Come on, that's unfair. It did, however, attack radical feminists, and I apologise for that.

Furthermore, the reason the comment hadn't been deleted before was that I hadn't seen it. The page shows me "most relevant" comments by default, and whilst I do sort to show "all" comments, sometimes the comment section moves too fast for me to catch comments such as that one, especially when I'm moderating.

Seriously, you'd be surprised how fast you all type when you're angry... (I'm joking, trying to lighten the mood a little).

Either way, I had missed it, and deleted it when it was pointed out and I found it after that. Sometimes this happens, and please. If comments like that remain on the page, don't assume it's because I don't care. Sometimes I miss them. Others, real life shit is happening.

zebrasdontwearbras · 20/10/2019 23:07

In the context, that is just as bad, 2B Sad

I can't get my head around the horrific lack of respect for women.

Karabair · 20/10/2019 23:09

Have you banned a person who refers to women as "garbage"?

Women are the targets of male violence and language like this incites it and supports it.

2BthatUnnoticed · 20/10/2019 23:21

The poster was a trans woman, and personal friend of Frothy

Not banned

Yes we do type fast Smile

I wish you well Frothy

FrothyDragon · 20/10/2019 23:26

She's actually a woman, not trans. Not banned, but I am keeping an eye for further comments along those lines as I'm not going to tolerate them further.

Creepster · 20/10/2019 23:26

You are not the only person to ever run a FB page, FrothyDragon.
Some people have run more than one page with 5000 members.

I suggest, again, that you stop digging.

Karabair · 20/10/2019 23:27

So a male calling women who stand up for women's rights "garbage". And being left in what is a predominantly female space to spread their hatred.

How very feminist.

Wait! No it isn't. It's something else.....

SillyBillyBandy · 20/10/2019 23:28

Jesus give Frothy a break. She's apologised and the tone in the last post on FB was very different.

Frothy, if you can pause the page, have a WineBrewGinand come back to it if you feel strong enough

You're trying to do a good thing. Thanks

Karabair · 20/10/2019 23:29

x-post A woman being free to call other women "garbage" for standing up for women's rights isn't much better.

Creepster · 20/10/2019 23:32

There is no getting around the fact that the page title is a lie designed to deceive women and girls.

zebrasdontwearbras · 20/10/2019 23:32

You'll always find women willing to put men/males first. The suffragettes had it, every women's movement ever has it.

Karabair · 20/10/2019 23:35

Why can't males set up their own pages to support male victims of rape? Why do they need a woman to do it for them?

2BthatUnnoticed · 20/10/2019 23:36

Yes I do support Frothy it is her page to run

I think radfems and libfems need their own spaces

That way, women who need female only spaces have support (in radfem spaces)

TW and “c*s” women have support (in libfem spaces)

There have always been different women’s spaces , we just need to be clear about what they are , I wouldn’t send a lesbian friend to Frothy’s page

But I would send a libfem there

RedToothBrush · 20/10/2019 23:41

Transparency is the key to trust.

There is a palpable sense of breaking that trust going on here. With the best will in the world, an apology can't simply fix that. Once it's gone it's gone.

The argument here about the use of the word 'her' is about the idea of transparency which some feel is lacking as a result of becoming mixed sex by replacing sex with gender.

Karabair · 20/10/2019 23:43

I don't think there have always been different female spaces which have males in them. That's a new one.

Once again, women-only space is a radical feminist concept/invention, which once again the lib fems are appropriating and watering down.

If there wasn't a wider move to erase female only spaces in real life so that we no longer have women-only toilets, schools, colleges, prisons, rape crisis centres and refuges maybe what's happening there wouldn't be a problem, but it's a reflection of a wider move in the culture to destroy female created spaces that were informed by an understanding that women are female and thus have particular needs.

2BthatUnnoticed · 20/10/2019 23:49

I’m with you kara

I agree

But if Frothy wants to run her page this way

I guess it means we need a new page. I would happily contribute money but does anyone have time / availability?

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