Wedding!! Sister being walked down aisle by brother

[hardie]

My DS is getting married on Saturday. Big church wedding, i am only bridesmaid, our DD is dead and DM alive and well. So It turns out DS wants one of our brothers to walk her up the aisle. This absolutely infuriates me, especially as I will be leading this procession and it goes against everything rational, feeds into male superiority and validates it. DS hates attention and feels like anything else will be different and have people talking (we are from a rural village and brother would be the usual way to manage aisle in weddings where dad dead..but it's still bloody 2018). She wants no one making a fuss or raising eyebrow. She is well aware of my views on this. So do I just suck it up (her choice etc..) or chat to her properly on this? DM would be happy to accompany her up aisle. I also really really don't want DS to feel even more self conscious here. Can someone help me articulate a few arguments in support of DM route - other than what I have noted above. Many thanks (first time posting but read these boards a lot)

”it rankles me as looks at if I approving this charade.”

It really doesn’t! It won’t occur to anyone to wonder whether you or anyone else approves the choices your sister has made. And if they are weird enough to wonder whether you’ve given your approval, they won’t assume from the fact that you are a bridesmaid that you have approved it.

Not your wedding, not your day, not your choice. Have you ever considered that maybe she wants your mother & and the rest of the wedding focused on the joy of he wedding and not bring the attention to the fact that your father isn’t able to be there. Have you also considered you’d DS is working overtime to just keep the peace?
Weddings + families = nightmares.

Respect your sisters decision and don’t be an overbearing nightmare.

Thanks for the second post. So sis is choosing a brother because she thinks the community would disapprove, not because that's what she wants? After they've probably seem Megan and Harry's wedding this may have been the ideal time to walk down alone or with her mum and break away from tradition.

And as for everyone wittering on about DS and Dsis abbreviations - far better to just write it, they're silly anyway!

She is well aware of my views on this Except it isn't YOUR wedding, so YOUR views are pretty much moot