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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Hi Mumsnet, if you are asking feminist women to consider whether Mumsnet is for them, please be clear that the space *we* made here is for *all* of us.

338 replies

leyat · 02/05/2018 23:41

So apparently MNHQ is asking women they are suspending for saying things like men are men, to consider whether Mumsnet is for them.

I feel it's important to be clear that we want feminist women to have a home here, we - all the women who engage here - have made this board what it is (I'm relatively new so I am in awe of the women who have been shaping this wonderful space all this time) and we don't want women excluded from this space because they won't lie about biology and acquiesce to misogyny and genderism.

This is meant to be a kind of refuge for us, where we do not have to submit to male authority, where we can let off steam and share without needing to worry about dealing with misogyny, and where we can feel a degree of safety and find sisterhood. I can't think of anything more awful than a woman who comes here to share in this, in this one space we have that's meant to be ours, to then be told she should consider excluding herself because she won't bow to male authority on what a woman is.

So it needs saying, Mumsnet, this is a board for all feminist women, we don't want anyone excluded or made to feel that this space isn't for them too. And please understand many women come here from backgrounds of abuse, we do live in a climate of male violence and misogyny that is currently getting worse, so I hope MNHQ take time to ask themselves how they want to treat women who come here. Mumsnet own the site, but it's the women who use this space who made it the vibrant refuge of sisterhood and resistance that it is, so please don't shit on that or indeed on the women who actually engage on your forum.

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BlackForestCake · 02/05/2018 23:44

Wonderful post.

MonsoonMama · 02/05/2018 23:47

Great post

TeresasGreen · 02/05/2018 23:53

❤️

auntycartmanslargertesticle · 02/05/2018 23:55

well said.

BeUpStanding · 02/05/2018 23:58

Yes. I agree entirely. This is such an important space for women to speak freely and it's horrendous to think we are losing it.

greenlanes · 03/05/2018 00:00

Wow. I just can't believe this. Mumsnet has been my haven over the last few years. Full of bright intelligent women who always have something to say. I might not like it , I may not agree but it is conversation that I cannot get anywhere else in my life.

leyat · 03/05/2018 00:02

I agree, such an important space, I really hope they have a rethink...

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FermatsTheorem · 03/05/2018 00:02

I've bumped the Spartacus biology thread.

That way they've got a nice one-stop shop to ban all of us, and we've got a nice thread for James Kirkup and Janice Turner to read! A mass banning of several hundred users for pointing out the bleeding obvious, namely that transwomen remain biologically male, however much they wish things were otherwise, and however much sympathy one has with their plight, would play well in the press, I think.

AngryAttackKittens · 03/05/2018 00:03

There's a "first they came for the..." metaphor in there.

Who'll be left to stand up for you, MNHQ, when the most strong willed women on your site have either been driven off or left in disgust?

LuisCarol · 03/05/2018 00:09

Agreed.

MipMipMip · 03/05/2018 00:12

Well said.

Itscurtainsforyou · 03/05/2018 00:14

Yep

Terfulike · 03/05/2018 00:16

Great post

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/05/2018 00:19

I'm worried for MN. I'm not sure that when they started this they thought they would be in the press and vilified for being the centre of the resistance!

But they haven't shut women down completely like so many other places. And I understand that they'd rather not get sued or interviewed under caution... Equally I think the intelligent, critical thinking women that make this place, won't be here to make it if they aren't allowed to speak truth to power.

It's difficult and I wouldn't want to be MNHQ right now.

WichBitchHarpyTerfThatsMe · 03/05/2018 00:29

Brava OP.

Snakie · 03/05/2018 00:31

Agreed.

KriticalSoul · 03/05/2018 00:33

you do realise that's a standard question they ask ANYONE who gets suspended banned right?

Its not a special little question they keep just for bigots and transphobes.

Its to do with asking someone if MN is the place for them if they can't manage to restrain themselves from breaking the fucking rules.

Tartyflette · 03/05/2018 00:44

So after all the feminists have been driven away and the Feminist Chat board has withered and died, Mumsnet would be barely distinguishable from Netmums. Is that really what they want?

spontaneousgiventime · 03/05/2018 00:46

Good post.

How MNHQ thought it was a good idea to allow Twitter to moderate us I will never know.

KriticalSoul · 03/05/2018 00:47

Tarty, the few of us long-term posters left here have been asking that for the last year.

MNHQ have more or less being quietly banning us one by one, usually with their 'we're not sure MN is the right place for you' email.

Of course, those of us who have been saying it have been routinely shouted down, told we're making it up, told we're seeing things...etc.

Now people are noticing, and most of the old fuckers who would have hauled MNHQ over the coals, aren't here any more.

Hyppolyta · 03/05/2018 00:48

Have Talk Guidelines changed so now its against the rules to tell the truth?

Males are male. No amount of surgery, identity, hormones, or feelings can make someone who is male, female.

leyat · 03/05/2018 00:56

Exactly, we can't be prevented from speaking the truth just cos it hurts the feelings of some men. That isn't freedom of speech, which is what Justine has been clear on in terms of what Mumsnet seeks to uphold. It's really disappointing that they have decided to compel speech from women using their site. Men are men, and it is not hateful to say so. What is hateful is pretending women are just a bunch of gender stereotypes and not an oppressed sex class.

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NewbieSpartacus · 03/05/2018 01:00

Agreed. I need this space. I need freedom of speech. This is where I came for help when I needed it and found sanity. If it wasn't here I would only have found the Mermaids route and thought I was alone. I'll do whatever it takes to stop the TRAs taking this from us.

FloraFox · 03/05/2018 01:22

This is MNHQ's standard expression when your jacket is on a shaky nail - please consider if MN is for you. For a reason MN have never really explained, they have allowed this discussion to continue when most feminist websites and FB pages shut it down years ago. Unfortunately, we definitely can be prevented from speaking the truth on MN, FB, twitter or wherever because these are private enterprises that currently can apply whatever standards of speech they want. You only need to look at the submissions to the parliamentary committee looking at hate speech to see the pressures being put on women to stop talking about trans issues.

I've been suspended in the past for a reason I did not think was justified and I found the "please consider if MN is for you" message very frustrating but I still appreciate the space we have here.

I don't know why these posters have been suspended. Hopefully they will be reinstated. I'm not a mindless cheerleader for MN but I think we need to appreciate the space we have here - we don't actually have a "right" to it, sadly.

FloraFox · 03/05/2018 01:31

Also, there is a long-standing tradition on MN of TSSDNCOP which I think contributes to frustration sometimes.

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