DH is 'glad' of verdict

[HexBramble]

I'm sickened tbh.
He announced this morning that he is happy and glad that justice has been served and will not listen to reason.
We have 3 daughters.

Yy enthusiasm. DH likes to wind me up on certain trans issues, but if we ever had a big clash in belief like that (especially as a rape victim) there would be no getting over it. :(

You could of course leave the unintelligent, hard-of-thinking bastard but he would still be your daughters father and play a part in raising them.

Poor you though and your poor daughters. If this is his stance on this issue, then I bet he's a delight in other areas too.

Your opinions are not above those of the jury. They are opinions and leaving your husband over this is insane!

There are lines in the sand. If my dh came out with racist or misogynistic views that I didn't know he held I'd leave him. Some things can't be put down to a difference of opinion.

But the husband may like to have faith in our justice system? How is that worth a divorce

There's other stuff going on ffs, not just a disagree,ent about the court case.

Smirking. Jesus.

sack a manager because he looked like he was taking a bribe... but still allow a player to play when he was a convicted rapist!

Had to re-post this.

Shit. What a World we live in

Yes Saucery

The OP may be willing to let this drop and ever speak of it again. But it's obvious he won't.

I can see him staring at the tv with a big grin on his face, turning it up slightly during the chanting and watching her reaction from the corner of his eye

I came on the thread to say you should drop this as its just not worth the argument about it: my DH is the most fantastic, gentle guy who treats me and our children amazingly. But he is quite black and white and was always a bit sceptical about this case because of the 'proving beyond reasonable doubt that he didn't have 'reasonable belief' in consent' bit. I did manage to convince him on a lot of it and that it wasn't just a 'normal weekend gone a bit awry' but he has never been 100% about it. However, it kind of goes without saying that he thinks evans is a total scumbag.

Reading the rest of the thread though, that is kind of worrying - he would actively applaud evans and condone identifying the victim? Wowzers.......

A male colleague shared the story on FB yesterday and commented something along the lines of support for CE. There were lots of likes (all men) including quite a few other colleagues.

It sickens me how the issue of consent is still not understood at all in 2016. These are men, in their 20's, future fathers and husbands and yet seemingly potential rapists...

How men respond to this case in particular is a real eye-opener, actually. Because by his own admission, Ched Evans' behaviour was absolutely repulsive on so many levels. Ironically, The Sun's headline today nailed it: regardless of the jury's finding him not guilty, he is so clearly guilty of such amoral, entitled, misogynistic, abusive behaviour that most right-thinking people can clearly see him for what he is anyway.

And thus any man who thinks that there is anything to be celebrated here - where a man walks uninvited into a hotel room where two people are having sex, asks his mate if he can have a go, does so, leaves, all without ever speaking to the woman he is actually sticking his dick into, where his fiancee appears to have tried to bribe witnesses to change their story, where the complainant's sexual history is raked over in court - any man who thinks that this is a good day for any reason has serious, serious problems with women.

Yep, anyone who supports Ched Evans getting away with the rape he admitted to is someone who should be considered a danger to women and likely rapist.

No way would Inallow a man like that to share ny home and that of my daughters.

When chatting to an old friend on fb who supported the verdict, I mentioned the fact that if this were a female relative of his maybe he would feel different (he called the victim a slapper etc), he replied that he would be so embarrassed of her and ashamed of being 'spitroasted' by two men.

He has a daughter

I was
He had not been deleted

My husband and son (59 and 16, so wide variance in age group) both think it is disgusting and that he should be inside as the original sentence should have been much longer. Their shared view is that nobody has the right to have sex with anyone who is drunk unless consent is given in advance or can be reasonably inferred from a long loving relationship (although hubby thinks that even this is dubious as he wouldn't want to get his leg over with a woman so drunk she was incapable of speaking).

I'm so sorry that your DH has let you down so badly, OP.

In other aspects of your life, does he display questionable attitudes towards women?

Your DH is an animal. You need rid.

I have been reflecting on this case on and off all day. I don't have words for how disturbing I find the outcome and many responses. It is easy for me to say as I am already single but I would not stay with someone who did not see the damage done to women here.

I have too, Cocoabutton. My daughter's travelling in India and has written about the constant attention and comments she's received (albeit non-threatening/sexual) from men. Then we have Trump trying to get into the White House and twats like Ched Evans and his supporters here. It's enough to make me cry.

That was lulu hits the nail on the head. What sort of man wants to have sex with a woman in these circumstances? Any man who even gets a lifter contemplating having sex with a barely conscious woman is a candidate for broadmoor. Yet the myth of unappeasable male sexuality normalises this behaviour. All so fucked up.

My son commented after the first trial that even if he hadn't been found guilty then he would still be scum. I haven't spoken to him about this one. My husband is astonished at the verdict.

OP I'm really sorry to hear this and frankly rather alarmed that you say it's set off alarms about other things

I only have two straight male friends, I've never been a man's woman because of the underbelly of misogyny you so often find. They were pleased when he was put away and horrified now. One of them is particularly anti football, I've never paid much attention to it but I'm beginning to see why he feels this way.

If your partner isn't even prepared to look at the facts, I particularly wonder if he even knows the woman didn't bring charges - then I'm afraid it's time to have a serious think in what you'll tolerate and how you want your dds raised.

To contrast, my DH has simply deleted anyone on his social media who posted in favour of Evans. One of them he had been friendly with for years. He was appalled at Evans' behaviour over the last few years, has had many discussions with male friends where he has pointed out how very few women report and this has shaken his belief in a country he really believed in.

Your son is quite right, Lass

Hex I'm sorry if this oversteps a mark but has he ever acted in a way towards you that suggests he feels he has a right to have sex when he wants to regardless if you do?

RJ I don't mind you asking, but the answer is no, no he hasn't.

Actually, we're not close in that sense.
Not any more.

I'm thinking that this is the start of the end.

Ducking out now, but I'm leaving the thread stand because it has so many eloquent posts on it.

I need to read it, and re- read it.

Thanks everyone.

What sort of man wants to have sex with a woman in these circumstances
one who regards women as mere pieces of meat to be used for male sexual gratification
there is also the element of men bonding with each other during the exploitation of women's bodies, affirming their masculinity together