Amal Alamuddin has changed her name professionally

[EhricLovesTheBhrothers]

I'm actually disappointed. Her choice blah blah but honestly. Successful women who change their names professionally always strike me as either stupid or coerced and I'm sure that's unfair I'm not really but honestly why be so committed to the concept of the obliteration of the unmarried self that you allow it to impact on your professional reputation and renown?

"implies that there really is some sort of Borg-esque sisterhood that has monthly committee meetings to judge women's behaviour"

Are you saying that this isn't what happens here in FWR, Buffy? I thought that our board was the political epicentre that ruled the world. So very disappointed

I'm unable to see being compared to the Borg as as bad thing! I love the Borg.

i haven't yet qualified for committee meeting attendance. i have to wait for the minutes to tell me how to do feminism and who i should be shunning

If I got married to the actor I fancy I'd certainly change my name- to
Mrs Fuck Yeah Richard Armitage.

It's the uncompromisingness I like.

Borg Queen: We are Borg.
Seven of Nine: I am an individual!
Borg Queen: You're only repeating their words. You sound like a mindless automaton.

The Doctor: You're a woman, Seven.
Seven of Nine: Is that an observation or a diagnosis?

Tomin: Heeey. Why don't we go back to my quarters? I studied Human mating rituals.
Seven of Nine: Remove your hand or I will remove your arm!

Aaaahh :)

NOT rtft

I agree not every choice is a feminist choice. But I don't think feminism is about the ball busting of individual female's choices. Especially when those choices are a part of a long standing tradition that if you break with you are making a statement. It's like I think it would be unfair to say "lena Dunham shaves her legs and is therefore stupid and coerced". We're all just trying to poodle along, and dismantle the patriarchy in our own way.

I think this sort of thing and some articles I've read are quite offensive and I sure as hell don't think she is stupid or coerced by George Clooney . A non specific thread about married names would be fine.

I'm not sure about the suggestion that all newly married couples should choose a new name. Partly because it would still create the problem of making it harder to trace who someone used to be (for people in professions where that's important), and partly because not everyone sees marriage in quite that starry-eyed, 'everything is different now' way.

I appreciate it would be less patriarchal than the current situation, but I think there are better answers.

Would just like to say how struck I am by the eloquence and grace/dignity in argument of Buffy, Ehric & Voyager.

Have been following the thread closely as feminism is an area I feel v. strongly about. SO agree about how hard it is to always make the 'right' choices given the way the patriarchy is stacked against us. No one on this thread seems to be claiming 'feminist perfection'. I hold my hands up and confess I have botox regularly.

But if we can't debate these broader things then things will never change. I sincerely hope that the more we discuss and question the way our society is structured the more things will gently shift towards a fairer world.

And FWIW, Bonsoir, yes I DO think equality is an extremely big deal and should be the bedrock of any civilised society. Equality in its broadest sense, not just for gender.

Oh really? Haven't come across her before!

my feeling is that the US political plans may be very relevant

I had not thought about this in the context of this thread, but there may be something to this. There have been musings for years that Clooney might run for office. When Hillary Clinton married Bill, she did not change her name. It was several years later that she did because of concerns that her feminist persona was hurting Bill politically. Of course, this was many years ago and it was Arkansas and George would be likely to run in the much more liberal California. But I think that it could still be a factor; he would not gain many votes by Amal taking an obviously feminist stance, but he could well lose some of the more conservative votes he might otherwise get.

As an aside, I remember in the 1992 presidential campaign, you never heard Hillary's maiden name mentioned at all (and in the US it is customary for women who take their husband's name to use their maiden name as their middle name). Then on the night before the inauguration at the presidential gala, she was introduced as Hillary Rodham Clinton. You could almost see her thinking "ok, I've compromised to help get us here, but now I want my name back." I wish she would run now as Hillary Rodham, but that would be political suicide, I think.

It's a shame I didn't write what Chunderella?

I have responded to your points and those of other posters. I don't think changing your name is career suicide for most professional women, if they want to change it. In no way do I think they should change if they don't want to.
I do think that choice is the most important thing for women. This isn't fetishization.

Thanks also that's very nice of you to say. I smother my feelings about name changing so much in real life that it all kind of spilled out here.

Equality isn't some sort of nirvanaesque goal that should take precedence over all other human considerations...

Maybe MNHQ should work on deleting comments like this (if they really have a commitment to non sexist language) rather than comments that say the poster has said worse.

Her original surname came from her father. It is still therefore patriarchal. I believe she is in love. This is beautiful. Taking The Clooney name is probably an act of love. So be it. She may regret it if she splits up from him. Let's hope she doesn't . I wish them happy.

Srsly??!

An act of love? So does he love her less because he has kept his own name and identity?

rhiannon why don't you read the whole thread? It might be enlightening.

Then again, maybe not.

Of course there are parallel threads running at the moment which fully demonstrate how a woman can keep her own name but also have objectionable misogynist opinions - Judy Finnigan. Not changing your name on marriage does not mean automatic feminist allegiance, any more than changing it means you are precluded.

But name changing is still very much a feminist issue that ties into many other feminist issues, and it is right to discuss it

I left the thread yesterday because I recognised that large parts of it were not a debate. It was primarily shouting down anyone who didn't agree with the "right" view. A debate would involve questioning why Bonsoir and Rhiannon hold the views rather than denigrating them in a really fierce way.

Oh and the irony of telling me that you are entitled to express opinions. Of course you are. As are LittleBear, Bonsoir and Rhiannon. Even if we disagree.

Plus the irony of saying that people can't come on and stonewall debate. Nope they can't. But everyone who has come along and disagreed with the OP, Voyager etc has been quite aggressively dismissed in my opinion.

The final irony that struck me is saying around smothering views in real life and it spilling out here.

As I see it in rl in my day to day job, one of my passions is increasing the level of senior women in corporate Britain to be equal to men. On average there are just as many graduates as women who enter various professions but by the time you get past age 35 85% of the leaders are men. I can frequently go into a room with 20 senior deal folks and be the only woman. So I am passionate about changing this and IME doing it is around debating these issues, doing shadowing, mentoring and encouraging/inspiring them not to let their careers take a backseat to their dh's career. Yelling and sneering at them because they changed their name isn't going to achieve this equality. Debating, questioning, putting forward a firm but kind rather than aggressive point of view just might contribute to the equality for which we all strive. Again just my opinion and rl experience.

You could just say I am being overly sensitive to the comments on this thread or maybe I am not feminist enough for fwr. But somehow I don't think I got through science degrees (mostly men), professional qualifications (mostly men) and being one of the most senior women in a global household name organisation (guess what? leadership are mostly men) with the same name that I have had from birth (ignored the male leader who knows dh and suggested I change my name to his) by being overly sensitive or not being a feminist. Then again as Petula just said JF didn't change her name!!