Taking AN ADULT child with a disability to a brothel

[DowagersHump]

They are talking about this on Women's Hour now. I wonder if parents with a daughter feel that she needs to be taken to a sex worker? Or is it only male children that 'need' sex?

We do as a society choose to view it as acceptable and even noble for low paid workers who are mostly women to clean the shit off people. Hardly a high aspiration in it's self.

Perhaps if you accorded the same level of empathy for every human to use enjoy human rights then prostitutes could be seen as something other than victims.

But leif you are the only person failing to look at this from both sides. Maybe you need to recognise that on the whole and I would go out on a limb here and say that for most if not every prositute they are the victims of abuse, exploitation and opression. You do need seem to show an awful lot of grasp of social justice.

do not seem to show... is what i ment

as a care worker in the past i was happy enough to provide support to someone with cleaning and toileting, wasnt a terribly glamerous aspect of the role but one I carried out with dignity and respect and it bared no affects to my own dignity and respect. I most certainly would not be willing nor able to perform sexual favours for anyone where my own values and dignity would be jeoperdised. what a very ridiculous argument.

I haven't likened toileting to sex-related services. I chose to mention it because toileting is an intimate service that many would find repulsive, which presumably would also apply to helping a disabled person masturbate. I didn't say they were equal.

I also mentioned paying for company, as that's an intimate service with fewer physical or moral demands but which meets an emotional requirement. I actually thought that was a useful point, but everyone else seems more interested in toileting.

I don't think toileting or providing companionship are remotely comparable to providing sexual services (whether that be turning the pages of a porn mag or having sex).

How not, Dowager? I ask from curiosity, not point-scoring.

Personally I'd find it easier to be friends with someone than clean their shit or masturbate them. I know there are people, opposite to me, who'd rather tend to physical needs (toileting) than make an emotional investment in a disabled client.

When it came to, let's say, masturbating them - male or female - I honestly am not sure whether I'd prefer that to toileting them. I wouldn't be brilliantly suited to either, tbh.

dangerousliaison: Oh please! I have gone out of my way to make it as plain as day that I prostitution is wrong, why do I have to spell out why, do I need to repeat the same mantra as everyone else that prostituted women are probably abused, well for the record I think the majority are abused. That is a human rights issue as is trafficking, sustance abuse, and domestic violence.

But that only tells us what that some women have really difficult lives, why then does knowing and accepting that stop us from exploring how OTHER humans have difficult lives and how we as a society could be responding to that. Look back at all my posts and show me where I have not shown social justice awareness. One last time for the record the original op was not mine but someone who found it horrifying that disabled people should be facilitated to have sex.

A thought has just occured to me that seems relevant. If a feminist disabled woman wanted to enjoy the same life choices as other none disabled women including the ability to have random unplanned sex with whoever she felt like, woud this be a feminist isse if she needed assistance to say get undressed? Or would it be a personal issue that had nothing to do with the patriarchy?

Don't be daft, Leith.

Her sex partner would have to get her undressed. I'm not aware of this being a problem during sexual encounters.

Have a

Sorry garlic let the side down again eh! I did not put it as well as I should, but what I had in mind is someone with sever limitations wishing to get it on with another person of the same. Both partners with CP for example, might have the ability to be intimate but need help to get to that stage. Given the points made by others it would seem that some professionals would find it difficult to have that kind of involvement.
I do think garlic we have made people accept that shades of gray are always around moral and ethicle issues.

I kind of like your imaginary scenario. I most certainly would help them get undressed, even get into position (as long as I could leave during copulation). That's not the same as giving them a hand-job, though. I still can't figure out whether I'd feel exploited if I agreed to do this for a disabled person I was a professional friend to, or if I'd feel differently according to their sex. It's not as clear-cut to me as it is to some others here ...

I'm a disabled woman. This idea that if women had equal economic status with men, we'd get male prostitutes only applies if you think that equality is possible in the current system. Unlikely imo. So gender equality can't exist with ableism and prostitution, they're aspects of totally different societies. Like feudalism and democracy.

I'd like to agree with that, Julia. I'm not sure I do. I'm upset to think I shan't live to find out what inequalities will be perpetrated by a gender-equal society. But all I can do is keep working towards it.

Leith - my OP was not about that at all and I suspect you know that full well. It was about bring horrified about a parent facilitating a disabled adult child's access to prostitution.

I'm not entirely sure who you're arguing with here.

anyone who will argue back by the looks of it

How very grown up of you dangerouse, did you draw the ickle smiley face all by yourself or did a grown up help you?

Actually, FWIW it's a grin not a smiley face.

I sit corrected Lurking.