Vile vile Ann Summers product

[Dillytante]

Apologies if there has already been a thread on this.

Bj strap

I actually don't know what to say about this.

---

This thread is years old and inactive. If you've found this page in search of Ann Summers products that have been tried and tested by fellow Mumsnet users, you might find our guide to the best Ann Summers sex toys useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ 💐

Bitter Would the strap be more acceptable if it was a woman in control of a man?

Pringle Yes...some kind of cunnilingus hammock.

Awkward I just sprayed wine all over my laptop reading that! I might have to invest in one once I find a willing man

If you don't get how any woman could enjoy being in a submissive role sexually, then fair enough, but women who buy this aren't delusional and kidding themselves that it is for their enjoyment, as well. ( i am only ever submissive during sex, believe you me)

I concern myself if my pleasure and if that involves a cock (it doesn't always have to) then i will set a scene that suits both of us and it can include these sorts of things.

You'll probably find that lesbians would use this during bondage.

Pringle I'll let you know once I've run a few up on my Singer.

I was going to name change for this but fuck it, if I can never show my face here again, oh well.
I enjoy having my face fucked, if my clitoris is being stimulated at the same time as I am gagging then the orgasms I have are intensified amazingly, running through my nipples and my legs. This product is not something I would use though as I like my hair being the thing held onto.
I also like to sit on my partners face so that I am fucking their face with, well, me.
Not that I am saying that every women should run out and buy this or indeed try having their face fucked.
But some of us do.

I'm not naive. I get how submissive play works. Generally, the submissive person is quite explicit about what pace the whole thing goes at. I don't see how this thing makes anything "pretend": 3mm past the woman's comfort zone, and the gag reflex kicks in. There's nothing pretend about that.

You can still have codes, though, such as a tap on the back of his knee means go easy or stop.

No LeBOF the sub is not always explicit about the pace and that's the fun..part of the pleasure is not knowing...it's about WANTING loss of control however briefly and it will stop the moment the sub says it should.

I am irritated by the assumption that this product is going to be bought by men who will then use it to control women against their will....some women, me included can open their throat....and there is no gag reflex unless I close it again...I would stop any "force" before that happened (if I wanted to).

I KNOW that some of you feel that women losing control and men dominating in bed is wrong because men have designed this through the use of porn...which I am not a fan of having read a lot of literature about the amount of abuse victims who become porn actors....but I feel that without porn, sex IS for some people about enjoyng control or lack of it.

I guess so, Birdsgottafly. But I'm not convinced that Ann Summers really caters for the cognoscenti of the S&M scene, who are clued up on the intricate etiquette. I think they aim themselves at the mainstream and the dabblers. And I think that in that context, this delightful device will more than likely be used to sexually bully and pressurise women who are being coerced into "spicing up" their sex life. It is being sold alongside fairly vanilla odds and sods, and the message is that forced fellatio is just a bit of a laugh, and the least a woman who wants to please her man should be up for. I think that's grim, and very open to abuse.

Code words are hardly "intricate ettiquette"! They talk about such things in most of the crappy mags aimed at 20 something women...

But if man (or woman) were so inclined to be forceful and abusive I cant see why they would go to the effort to buy some textile to help them in this abuse.

The abuse doesnt need an aid

That's right Star if a man in a relationship with an unwilling partner...unwilling in the sense of bondage or forced fellatio wants to do this thing against his partners will, then he just WILL...the purchase of an aid for the job wont change this.

You can''t complain about this and then not complain about the handcuffs also on sale. THEY could theoretically be "Open to abuse" also.

At first I was like bwahhaaaahaa then I was like and now I'm . This is wrong in soooo many levels... wondering if women will be buying it though.

TBH you could say a number of those sex toys would leave anyone (men and women) open to abuse, such as anal toys

I suppose we disagree then, Awkward. I think you are extrapolating an awful lot from your own personal experience though, while ignoring the reality of most other people's situations. If people want to look this 'niche' stuff up, that's up to them and their own issue. I still think it is likely to be misused on a mainstream high street sex site, and that it is likely to put pressure on women to view quite hardcore S&M as on a par with tickle sticks and French maid outfits.

I'm quite tempted by one but probably won't get one as I quite like having DP grab my hair instead.

If a man is going to abuse his partner he will whether Ann Summers sell these or not. I'm sorry but a nice normal man won't suddenly turn into an abuser because they can buy this.

Oh ffs! HOW is it different to HANDCUFFS??? None of you are saying they're wrong! What about the ropes, paddles and straps they sell?

Either complain about ALL of the Bondage stuff or none of it!

LeBoff it is only likely to be "misused" if some freak buys it as part of a "rape kit" or if some poor woman is in an abusive relationship...in whch case, ANY item could be construed as potentially abusive if her partner had enough imagination...

I'm not talking about nice normal men, Kayzr. I'm talking about the significant minority of abusive men who gradually ratchet up their bullying with the full permission of the mainstreaming of pornified sexual violence.

And while I'm at it LeBOF surely French Maid outfits are just as bad in that they encourage women to be subservient.

Some people may find French maid outfits distasteful, but they are unlikely to actually vomit while wearing them.

I didn't get the memo that says we have to be quiet about things that we think are demeaning to women as a group because a number of individual women get off on it. When did Posting Patty's right to an orgasm that isn't even obliquely questioned become more important than the right to discuss things on a theoretical level?

Awkward, if one gets off on it, that's nice for one. It doesn't ipso facto mean that the product cannot represent a further shift in the idea that restraining women during sex belongs on the high street. One can love one's orgasm, others can protest against a wholesale shift they find disturbing. Everyone can just knock themselves out.

It's odd the way that sexual expression is increasingly being held up as more valid and right than intellectual and verbal expression on here.

"demeaning to women as a group because a number of individual women get off on it"

There's your problem. You cant appoint yourself as the spokeswomen for the "group" if not everyone agrees.

Absolutely Hester. And twisty says it better than I could too:

blog.iblamethepatriarchy.com/2007/01/25/perfunctory-bdsm-comment-of-the-week/

Mary - this blog explains why BDSM can be problematic, and why feminists are still allowed to analyse what gives some women orgasms. Patriarchy - that shit is pervasive.