Obese? Wanting to join a friendly thread ?

[SeatbeltExtender]

Hi

As my user name says this summer the Ryan Air seatbelt did not fit.
Yesterday I had to sit on a wooden deck chair and I found myself trying to Google what the weight limit could be

So tomorrow I start a diet.
So many threads on Mumsnet are for people much smaller than me
I'm 18 stones and 5lbs.

Please feel free to join if you are seriously overweight, please don't join if you are just averagely fat.

Hi, can I join please? 19st 1 currently and just stuck in a rut. Initial target would be in the 15s, then pre pregnancy weight in high 13s, but tbh losing ANYTHING would be the dream right now as we’re over halfway through 2025 and I’m only down just under 2 stone because I am taking the scenic route/piss - pick whichever one you like 🤣. Thinking of possibly rejoining slimming world for the accountability side but still have a lot of my old books so enough to go on (I know what I NEED to do - it’s just doing it). I’ll weigh in on a Monday x

Hi @Mumwithbaggage good to hear it went well :) I'm sure you looked lovely in your floaty dress x
We sound very similar re: self-esteem - similar age too I think? - I'm 59.
I always suffer from thinking I don't 'deserve' new clothes or to look at 'the best' for myself ... I had a complicated childhood which has definitely made me who I am today.
Like you, if you met me you'd think I was a confident professional woman who is in control and knows what she's doing. It's all just a mask LOL.
Hope the pampering gives you a boost for the next stage of the celebrations x

Welcome! A 2 stone-ish loss is fantastic @pottytrainingdd. Well done.

I've been stuck for weeks too. So I am thinking my weight loss is a marathon not a sprint.
It's the overall lifestyle changes week after week that help me - in my case, no midweek wine and less biscuits with my tea.
Also portion control. I admit I was eating the same size plate of food as my DH, and as I'm only just over 5 ft it's no wonder I piled on 3 stone over the past few years :/
I did SW about 10 years ago and lost over 2 stone. But it was slow going for me. Never got the badges for big losses. I think the most I ever lost in a week was 2lbs. The Group chat and weigh-in were good for motivation, but have to say I didn't get on with all the over-processed 'free' foods like the sugary Muller yogurts and the Hi-Fi bars.

Let us know how it's going - we are a friendly bunch here.

Thank you @Jaq27 x. Yes, I'm 61. Funny the way we grow up!

Welcome @pottytrainingdd !

welcome pottytrainingdd, you will get lots of support here. I'm a real plodder with weight loss. I've stuck at 14.2 for 3 weeks but to keep it positive, this is my new normal, not 14.8 normal which is great. Looking forward to things starting with a 13 though.

Am going to the gym in half an hour. and Parkrun on Sat, skipped it last week as it was just too hot.

Well done jaq on the loss and enjoy the pampering mumwithbaggage

Hi everyone, haven't posted in ages as way too hot and I didnt expect my weight to change. Lo and behold, im still at 98kg. It just doesn't seem to move for me but im going to get back onto drinking more water and also portion control.

Had a bit of a tough moment as my friend has lost 18kg on Mounjaro and her starting weight was around 85kg. She was saying how fat and ugly she felt at that weight and I just felt like is that how she sees me. She then said i have to do it as im too heavy and that everyone is doing it. Tbh I don't look massive because of my height but the scales don't lie. I just dont understand how Mounjaro works to make such a massive difference. Nothing seems to work on me.

@Petra42
People can be so insensitive
When you say nothing works, what have you tried?
With respect, I don't think drinking more water and portion control will make much difference.
IMO you need to restrict sugar, fat and most carbs.
FWIW I'm doing slimming world and getting on well with it so far.

@HealthyWeightBy40 hey, I have been trying to restrict carbs, or one meal a day, but I think i just need to try harder. It just seems so hard to move even a lb.

‘Scuae me being straight forward but I suggest you tell your friend to ‘fuck off’ and just wait until she comes off the jab and stacks it all back on.

Petra people can be insensitive, I think sometimes they just don't think of how a comment about themselves can also make others that they are being criticized, and sometimes I think they do. I work with someone who appears very underweight and she goes on about her weight a lot and how she doesn't want to be 'fat and horrible'. I do think she would be mortified if I asked her if that is how she saw me. Yet my MIL makes very unsubtle digs, she is very, very slim but just around me, says how she feels heavy and 'maybe she should do more exercise' - I now join in and try to pivot the convo by acting tone-deaf and respond with, maybe walk a bit more then, the weather is lovely and sunny now, isn't it lovely having extra hours of sunlight, it's like being abroad... etc.. I know it winds her up that I don't appear to "confess" to my considerable weight gain.

I did go to the Gym last Thurs and ran for 20 minutes straight and did the 5K on a treadmill in 43 mins. I was so chuffed. My legs muscles were so stiff though so I couldn't go to the Park Run on Sat. Hopefully can go to the gym tonight.

It's Monday, wishing you all a good week ahead.

Oh @Petra42 that sounds so unkind and not at all friendly! ... Mounjaro has been a quick fix for your friend so she may have thought suggesting it was 'helpful'???!!! But it's not very supportive of you.

I know exactly what you mean about the stubbornness of the scale not moving week after week.
I too can't seem to lose a lb at the moment.
In fact (depressingly) I've ACTUALLY PUT ON 2lbs this week even though I've been 'good'. FFS.
Sometimes I think even if I ate a lettuce leaf a day I'd still maintain my weight.

Hi @CakeFace1234 Wow that is a great time for the 5k run! Well done. Also love your responses to the MIL. Very good way to pivot the conversation :)

I was feeling fat and ugly after my gain, but lovely DH said he loves me just the way I am. That's what we all need. To be loved for who we are, not what we look like. As an older woman I am on a weight loss journey to stay healthy and keep mobile into my 60s/70s rather than for looks and clothes (although that would be nice too).

Stay positive everyone. Look after yourselves and have a good week x

I have had an amazing weekend at my son's lovely wedding. I felt good in the dress I wore. Hopefully danced off the food I ate and all the bubbles I drank! I'm tired today after all the excitement so am eating exactly what I want before I get back onto it tomorrow.

It's our youngest's graduation next weekend so all go here! Need to keep the energy up as her graduation's a big deal too and we're all very excited.

Wow, so pleased you enjoyed your son's wedding so much, you must have been incredibly proud but it must also feel a bit surreal seeing your DS get married. Glad you felt good in your dress. I think you deserve a bit of indulging after such an amazing weekend.

What a busy July for you - I am sure the graduation will be another proud and wonderful family event. A huge achievement. Congrats to both of your lovely DC. xx

@CakeFace1234 thank you! x You know when it just seems right that a couple are together? They've been together 10 years already and it's lovely!

Well done on the running - I'll be back in the gym on Wednesday. It's just been so hectic this week!

Glad it went well @Mumwithbaggage ! Sounds like you had a fab time. Yes, this is the time to let yourself go and enjoy the moment -- there's a lot of good things going on in your family :)
Congrats to your DS and DD. My DD graduated 2 years ago this week. I was so proud. Hope you have a fabulous time celebrating together x

I'm trying to challenge myself at the moment by doing things outside my comfort zone (nothing major - eyebrows waxed and tinted, joining the gym, just regular stuff to most).

So I've said yes to going to Italy for a few days' city break in early October with two friends. Back on the gym/fast 800/classes. I've never had the seatbelt not do up but I'm a bit (lot) of a pudding in my bargain seat feeling uncomfortable. Also they walk loads for fun so I will be building up my stamina. That's a target for me!

Evening all

@pottytrainingdd belated hello! How are you getting on? Are you managing to follow the SW plan on your own? I'm doing SW and I find that going to the weekly meetings is really helpful to stay accountable and motivated. They are a nice bunch which helps even though the "consultant" is mildly irritating

@Jaq27 your DH sounds lovely
mine is similar, very supportive but loves me either way. And like you my main motivation is health but looking better is definitely a nice bonus!

@Mumwithbaggage glad you had a wonderful time at your son's wedding! Enjoy the graduation too. Lots of proud mum moments for you atm! And the trip to Italy is something to look forward to

I'm on week 6 of SW. the first 4 weeks were really successful, I lost 12.5 pounds! I did a food diary for the first 4 weeks, but then week 5 didn't have to do one, and put on 0.5 lb So I'm back to doing the food diary as clearly that was keeping me on track! Really hoping to lose 2 lbs by my next weigh-in so I can hit the stone mark 🤞
I have a family wedding on 16th August, 5 weeks to go. I have found a dress I feel good in, fits me now but if I can get a bit more boob room by the wedding that'll be good
We are going on holiday a few days after so in the next few weeks I need to buy a swimsuit - always dread swimsuit shopping but determined to find something I feel ok in (last year was miserable because I realised too late that my swimsuits were too small/tight).

It's definitely a marathon not a sprint but the mini goals do help. After my holiday I'll have another 10 weeks before my 40th birthday. I'd really love to go down a dress size by then.

@HealthyWeightBy40 sounds like you're doing brilliantly - looks like the food diary will keep you on track! I've never felt up to being weighed at SW but I know it works brilliantly for lots of people. I know that eating carbs doesn't help me at all so after the graduation next week when it's back to normal I'll get back on the plan.

I love your name by the way. My book was going to be called "Rock Chick by 40". Suffice to say it never happened and I'm now 61 :)

Wow @HealthyWeightBy40 you’ve done amazingly!
well done! 👏🏻
I also found the SW group organisers a bit irritating 😬 but being accountable in a group does really help.

@Petra42 I agree that politely but firmly insisting that friends / others don't project their insecurities on to you is really important. It's not you, it's them.

There is no reason we shouldn't have pampering is there @Mumwithbaggage but I know exactly what you mean.

I'm losing with a bit more regularity now, mainly I think because I'm not bingeing, and I'm eating two meals a day. I'm not counting calories but I do have a general awareness of calories of course. Every carbohydrate I eat (my only obvious sugar is fruit) is religiously accompanied by protein and fat. I've also given up all UPFs. That's expensive but probably not as expensive as WLIs.

I do aquarobics and a fair bit of walking, now have gym exercises to do, I wouldn't do anything high-impact. I also have physio and podiatry to help keep my poor old bod in a state to exercise. It's the consequence of eating drinking and sitting down too much these many long years!

Well done to everyone not giving up on losing a bit of weight, even if it's slow.

I found out there's a 'fat acceptance movement' documentary called Fattitude but that's not where I got my name - mine's from the much-missed Victoria Wood's fitness class sketch.

Hi everyone, haven't posted because I've been out pretty much every night eating out! I have put on 1lb. So im still just under 99kg and am starting again from today. I have at least 15kg to lose 😥

@Petra42 - you’re ahead of me still! It’s all perspective based.

Anyway, I’m coming to the end of the programme through the football club and my final weigh in is on Wednesday, but staff end of term do is on Tuesday! I’m going to drive to minimise pointless calories but what can you do?

Regardless, I’ve lost just over 3 stone since the 31st March. ‘Merely’ through calorie counting and more exercise.

Hi, sorry for going AWOL. Managed to see 18s again on Wednesday, woohoo! So 1.5lb off and I’m 18st 13.5 currently. Can’t weigh in tomorrow as I had a minor op this week but will report back a week tomorrow with the next weigh in. I’ve just been (extremely loosely) calorie deficit-ing but I do think I’m missing the accountability from the SW groups (not the leaders or certain members as when I did it previously they sent me under a little bit), I think post op recovery I’ll find my local one and sign up.

Hope everyone is having a fantastic weekend xx

Congrats!
I hate SW. I think the syn nonsense is really damaging to people who already have a damaged relationship with food. That’s why I liked the programme through the football club as it gave the accountability without the crap. Think all Football league clubs offer it as part of their outreach and it’s been free.

Hi All,
Weighed this morning and I have lost 1lb. So it's a woo hoo from me too. So chuffed with that. Am looking to the scales starting with a 13. I am going to the gym later and hope to go every night this week.

Petra I think after going out every night with just a 1lb on, is a win. Hope you had a great week.

Pottytraining well done for getting into the 18s. It's such a boost when you go down into the next stone band.
GrammarTeacher What an achievement! 3 stones in less than 4 months is really going some. I lost 4 after my first pregnancy in 6 months but that included a baby! and I worked really, really hard at that. So you've done so well.

Fattitude giving up UPFs is fantastic in itself. They have sneaked their way into our daily lives, plus easy to incorporate into dieting as the calories are all counted in the individual portions. I've tried to cut down on these too; I can bake but it's hard to resist a slice of warm bread and butter. Portion control is my downfall.
Mumwithbaggage well, done, I think a food diary is key for some to keep on track, it helps decide the 'cost and worth' of food when spending calories.

SW 14.08
CW 14.01
TW 10.0