Well done everyone on your scale and non-scale victories! Bloody impressive. Hope you are all proud of yourselves and pleased with your progress!
I had an Indian takeaway tonight. I ate naan bread, chicken tikka, salad, raita and bit of saag bhaji. Literally a quarter of what I used to eat and I am uncomfortably full.
I don't know why I still eat past the point of feeling full. Not every meal but some of them. I just end up in pain and full of regret and also a bit guilty.
Old habits trying to creep back in still, I guess.
I am still a work in progress and trying to be mindful that I built those habits up over 30+ years, I'm not gonna undo them all in 5 months.
Does anyone else really struggle with knowing what they look like now? I know I am smaller but I also still feel like I weigh 18st, like I still take up the same amount of space. I see a picture of me that someone else has taken and it feels a bit confusing, it takes my brain a moment to realise that it's me. I look in the mirror and I feel like I haven't changed. It's bizarre.
I finally got around to buying smaller underwear and every time I put a pair on I'm thinking to myself "no way are these gonna fit" and then they do and I'm shocked. I'd also forgotten how it feels to wear knickers that fit, my size 22 ones were so baggy they kept sliding down and now the new ones feel weird because they don't slide down.
I've gone up to 7.5mg.
Negatives: Hair loss, low mood (but have lots of stressors contributing too), more anxious than usual, bum has completely disappeared despite lots of glute exercises, boobs have not disappeared (sad about that), quite tired all the time.
Positives: I sleep like a log every night, I get cravings for aubergines and other veg, I am satisfied with 3 rolos instead of 3 packs of rolos, my skin is actually quite nice at the mo, my nails are v strong and grow quickly, despite my worst intentions I can only eat a quarter of what I used to.
For me, the positives still outweigh the negatives. I just wish it didn't affect my mood. My first month I felt soo good. If only that could have lasted.
Anyway, this isn't meant to be a negative or sad post. I'm genuinely doing okay. I just have all these thoughts and I need to get them out there to people who might understand or might tell me to get a grip and pull myself together. It also helps me process everything. So thanks for letting me do it on these threads.