Husband dislikes my mother of the bride dress choices, am I wrong?

[Biggles27]

Husband hates the dresses I loved - mob btw! He says the colour is wrong, the shape doesn’t suit. I felt fantastic in them ☹️. Ditching dh isn’t an option. Are they awful or is he being unreasonable?

I love the one with the bow at the back, plus the hat /fascinator best. You look amazing.

With your colouring I think you’d look fabulous in teal or turquoise.

If you’re only in your 60s, there’s no need to dress like the late queen 😂

This is nice?

Or this?

Pretty floral

Or bolder?

There is a great shop in Halifax called Dotty Bridal that have a massive array of MOB/MOG type dresses if you are anywhere near there

Neither. None are either good in shape or form. Colour is totally wrong for MOB. More suited for a funeral.

Realise that I may have commented on this day ago. Sorry if I've missed any moving on!

Do enjoy!!!

I was really surprised by all the negative comments "matronly" "frumpy" "not fitted" etc and then it occurred to me that probably most mumsnetters are aged 18 to 45 and yes of course like flimsy, fitted dresses. However like me, this lady is 60 plus and probably won't be posing on Instagram etc or wanting to be showing all her curves. Plus also we tend to buy clothes we can wear again for multiple occasions if we are spending a lot of money. I thought she looked amazing in the dress with the bow at the back. Please wear what YOU thinks suits you which will ensure you feel happy and confident on the big day.

@BeUmberMember - as I probably stated above, I’m in my sixties. I would absolutely refuse to be seen alive or dead in anything from any dedicated MOB shop.

Strangely I manage to buy stylish clothes that I can wear for years - without shopping at Phase Eight, or Hobbs, or John Lewis or any of the other brands on the tiny list that some people think are the only permissible choices for women over 50.

Not all over 60’s. I’m coming up for 80, been looking at all the websites recommended here and would happily choose this Bombshell dress.
https://aureva.co.uk/products/bombshell-rebecca-dreams-of-summer?_pos=3&_sid=5e847212b&_ss=r
Plus op says she loves Needle and Thread, lovely flimsy floaty dresses there.

I turn 60 next year. I don't think it's a matter of age so much as a matter of individual taste, & also one of personal style (& whether you care about looking dated or not).

The OP sounds quite diffident about her own style - understandable when she's lost so much weight! But she also doesn't found very sure what colours & shapes suit her.

Both her husband & daughter admitted to hating the dresses she tried on. They're generic overpriced, dated-looking, MoB dresses that don't fit the OP properly, do nothing for her newly discovered figure, & could have been purchased in 1986 not 2026.

From the style of the Susannah dress that the OP posted, she isn't wanting anything cutting-edge or out there in any way. But she can still wear a lovely, well-cut dress that is classic but also looks modern, not dated.

Facebook Marketplace & Vinted are FULL of these MoB dresses (& matching jackets, & hats/fascinators ...). The wearers are desperately trying to sell off something that they'll never wear again, which cost several hundred pounds or more, for a pittance. And they languish there for ever ...

The OP could easily find something lovely that, minus the MoB accessories, could be worn again for dinners out, birthdays etc. Much better value for money too, if she's going to spend £600 on a dress, to be able to wear it lots afterwards!!!

I'm sixty plus and wouldn't dream of wearing anything as badly fitting and boring as the two original dresses posted by the op. Being over sixty doesn't mean you can't wear beautiful clothes!

It's a pretty dress & I love Liberty prints - always have. So it's nice to see them used so widely - but the styling & photography are absolutely terrible!!! They've made it look like a 1980s Grattan catalogue ... such a pity as the clothes are not shown to best advantage at all.

The first dress is nice. You could brighten it up with a different colour bag/shoes and accessories. I think if you felt great in it you should wear it. Your daughter will want you comfortable and feeling a million dollars. I would just tell DH it’s a good job he doesn’t have to wear it 🙄 if your in doubt maybe go back and try it again with different shoes and maybe a bag.

If you read the thread & the OP's other posts, her daughter disliked them too.

I am mother of the bride x

It looks like you’re spending a lot of money, why not go into a few bridal boutiques that do MOB outfits that way you get that them amend them to your body. Or you could get a stylist as a department store to help you.

Definitely not right for a spring wedding, sorry OP! You have a lovely figure btw!

If you are taking a trip to London Me&Em and Needle and Thread, Rixo and Self Portrait are all lovely shops for something elegant and stylish. I had to send for dresses as I live in NI but it was great to browse websites and then try on at home. I wanted to tone in with my daughter’s dress, (it was ivory but some colours just looked wrong with it) and also the cappuccino bridesmaids dresses, so I could see all together and make sure we blended! Maybe send for some different styles to try at home before your trip? Most have very reasonable or free p&p. Then you can have a lovely trip with your daughter and have an idea of colour and style that suits you. Take some risks and try styles you haven’t before. Your weight loss is amazing - I probably tried over 30 different dresses 😅 before I found mine. You will have the best day ever xx

Same here. I'm genuinely puzzled what the demographic is for stuff like Veni Infantino.

I disagree, I think ALL shops have their fair share of horrors! Some shops appeal to some, some to others but what I do know is I could walk around any shop and find a few things to hold up and say “WTF?”
Personally, I like the Liberty Peacock dress, but it wouldn’t be my choice for MOTB, I find that too safe, I’d want something far more glam, something I wouldn’t wear to any old party, posh dinner or Ascot. I don’t care if I never wear it again, surely as mothers who reach that stage in our lives, we’re entitled for once to be frivolous. We’ve given everything to everybody, always put everyone else first, this should be a totally guilt free purchase, our only thoughts should be do I love it and can I afford it, with big emphasis on the ‘I’.

My objection to one off wear has nothing to do with guilt. I haven't martyred myself the way you describe and have no guilt about spending my own money on clothes. I love clothes and getting dressed up but I'd get no pleasure at all in a one off dress.

Especially if it were this sort of stuff

https://www.veni-infantino.com/collections/mother-of-the-bride-groom

https://www.seanrayment.co.uk/collections/mother-of-the-bride-dresses

Yes, agree with your husband. The first one, not great but not too bad. The second, awful and makes you look frumpy. Neither are very flattering. Maybe try something a bit lighter in colour and flowing perhaps.

Congratulations on your amazing weight loss!

You obviously have a lovely figure and a waist now, as you’ve already been told many times those dresses are not showing you off. I think you need to go somewhere like John Lewis or another department store where you can get a personal shopper to show you some ideas, they may surprise you with some choices that you hadn’t thought of yourself. Go in with an open mind and think about your new shape, not your old one.

I would also stay away from mother of the bride shops personally, as I think they tend to go on the frumpy side and will make you look older. It’s time to have some fun now! X

What a horrible post, why would you think such a thing or write it, the op clearly loves her daughter, and has a good relationship with her, she’s simply lost her way clothes wise.

I'm with the dh, you don't wanna rock up like the black widow!
The shape isn't good