Harry and Gabor

[laurwalsh]

My friend just sent me this. I adore Gabor mate and the work he does. His book 'in the realms of hungry ghosts' was life changing for me who had suffered serious addiction issues. But am I being too harsh to feel disappointed he's jumping on this band wagon of garbage. I'm sorry but Harry we're sick of listening to your trauma and no offence you've sung it to death, (and I don't even think it's that bad relative to how much he has gone on and on about it) and trauma aside you're a complete hypocrite with how you've treated you're family and the trauma you've put them through!!

I'm a fan of Gabor Mate's and if he thinks Harry is worth conversing with, then I'm prepared to change my mind about Harry. Or open it a bit at least.

Some great and insightful posts on her, thank you

Here

Haha Harry already trying to build back the brand. Probably this is the only interview they had available and willing to play that "qualified".

Spare me too.

I clicked on this when I suspected you meant GM. I have always been a bit troubled by Gabor Mate because, while I believe him to be very insightful on some things, I find him to be harmfully incorrect on others. He can be dogmatic. His ideas are interesting and some are useful and I'm happy to use them, but he has never belonged on a pedestal.

I'm assuming those who are interested enough will be paying the £17 to view the interview.
I'm looking forward to all of your insights.
If you're not paying the fee then i will be assuming my opinion will be as valid as yours, when it will inevitably kicks off.

Let's be honest, who is really gonna pay £17 (including a 'free' copy of the book) just to hear more twoddle woddle ??

Let's take for an example another recent autobiography of Pamela Anderson who had her own real traumas and struggles. Never once did I feel her being preachy, blaming her family and acting like an entitled victim. She told her story with power and dignity and it was interesting and dare I say powerful. That I appreciate and respect and think what and how she has done is positive. But Harry I'm just so sick of him. Just go away now! And seeing Gabor mate who I genuinely have so much respect for and has helped so many people I'm just disappointed in. Harry is not someone to learn from or take example of. Whaaaaaaaaaa make this privacy tour end

Well, listen to their conversation before your disappointed in him!

What things do you find him harmfully incorrect on?

You know you don't have to buy a ticket to the event. It's not mandatory
Why are you getting so worked up about it?

These people are only human and agree with @FloorWipes, shouldn’t be put on a pedestal. I have listened to GM in podcasts and have not found anything I could apply practically, and there is some self-mythologising going on.

Because I've suffered trauma and addiction and I've really learned so much from Gabor. His work and books are ground breaking and inspirational. But my issue is that by partnering with Harry it's going too far. Trauma doesn't excuse whinging and blaming on a public scale when family can't retaliate. That's not right and that shouldn't be something we associate with trauma and working towards compassion and understanding of serious mental health issues. Which Gabor does. Harry behaviour is just bad. It's spoiled it's vindictive and pathetic and it gives all the positive progressive work Gabor had done in that space a bad name.

Well Harry has obviously also suffered trauma and may have benefitted from Gabor's gems of wisdom. Harry has a much rights to Gabor as you do. You don't own Gabor.

And I appreciate I'm ranting randomly on Mumsnet about this. And not sure why either. So feel free to tell me to put a sock in it. But it bothers me I'm sick of him and his lack of awareness when there's so much more shite people are going through, and I'm protective of Gabor due to personal reasons. Anyway it actually helped just venting a bit. So thanks for listening if you don't agree 😊

I hope he has benefited from Gabor, I just don't think we need Gabor mate giving this whine fest more validation and promoting the way Harry is going on, and on and onnnnn. Go do what we all do and heal in private!!!

You read the poster in your first post. It says they are going to talk about living with loss and the importance of personal healing. Some people will find that helpful. What is whiny about that?

I get where you’re coming from @laurwalsh in the sense that Harry doesn’t have the same credibility as GM. There will be PR and publishing execs behind the scenes thinking about how they can sell more books by getting them to share a platform; it is the wellness ‘industry’ in that there is money to be made. GM might not have control over that.

Because for me personal healing is exactly that, personal. And what Harry is doing is anything but. It's not something that should be validated as a way to heal from trauma. If I went out to all my local pubs and family friends and the local newspaper and blogged about it with my side and said everything that's my truth knowing my family can't retaliate and will be exploited I would be wrong. No matter what I e experienced that's not ok. But look I'm obviously In the minority so I'll let it go. I won't be watching in a million years and just genuinely sick of being bombarded with Harry's 'trauma' and his bullshite.

@Starseeed I'm not mentally ready for a full on debate or anything, but in my view he is willing to push things through the lens of trauma that don't fit, his views on ADHD are not supported in evidence and I also agree with @dotdotdotdash that there is a level of self-mythologising, and that's something that I consider a red flag. I am very nervous of gurus. But that's not to take away from his insights as well.

This will go one of two ways.
Has it been arranged by Penguin Random House? If so there is every chance that he is going to make things worse for himself on the PR front.

Oh, thanks so much for this link!👏

@laurwalsh Curious - did your opinion change at all after reading Spare?

Thank you for posting this. I have never heard of him before I saw this pop up. I was thinking of watching the program (not sure what else to call it, I am tried so don't jump on me MN!), but honestly not sure.

I am going to look more into him though and see what he says, especially about ADHD because I am WELL versed.

It's just Harry selling Diana again. 🤷‍♀️ I wouldn't get too anxious about it because Harry won't stop squeezing money out of her memory until the tills stop ringing. Which could be a looooong time. 🥱

So this just disappointed me

He doesn't owe you anything.