How Harry lost his virginity

[SnottyLottie]

Harry described losing his virginity as "a humiliating episode with an older lady".

He said it was "with an older lady, who loved horses very much and treated me like a young stallion".

The excerpt read: "'I mounted her quickly, after which she spanked my ass and held me back… one of my mistakes was letting it happen in a field, just behind a busy pub. No doubt someone had seen us'."

source: Sky News

well I don’t even know what to make of that 😬🤭😆🤣

😂😂😂

I laughed at first because I thought it was a joke.

He appears to have forgotten that he is the son of the king and therefore this will be in the public domain forever. In hundreds of years kids will be reading this shite and laughing about him in their history gcse classes.

That was the first translation…

She deffo has form..... Gareth Gates, need I say more...

I think there needs to be a Blackadder revival to deal with the Harry Files.

Never underestimate the Pricey

It takes a special type of skill to sink lower than the gutter press - especially when you're writing about yourself. 🙈

I would like his Spitting Image puppet to make a return, reading out some extracts.

😂

My sides! 😂

Is the original text online anywhere? Can any Spanish speakers say how accurate the translation is?

This is such a tonic. I'm having a bad time right now but this has made me feel much better. It's worth having a royal family for when the monarch's second son buggers off to America, does a car crash interview on Oprah and then releases a book about being spanked by Mrs Robinson.

I’m still wondering if they got a spoof version... If not, Netflix must be feeling shortchanged.

I'll sign the petition!

It must be some kind of a spoof. Why on earth would H write something like that?

Woah! Fuck me.

They should get the puppet to read the whole thing on stage like Fleabag.

Was it Katie Hopkins?!

I think you mean ‘mount me’ 🤣

Did he not have a contract for 4 books? What on earth will be in the other 3.

This cannot be true.

This is the narrative he wanted to send out to the world? How can he complain about the RF not protecting him, if he publishes this bilge.

It has to be a hoax. Doesn't it?

That's what he said 😉

Katie Price?

he might think it was but recollections vary. Knowing the way his luck is going, it was probably her pal, Roxanne Reid…

The fact that it’s been hurriedly passed through Google translate is pure genius

I wonder how the leak happened? Human error?

Four books ?.. mind boggles
..
Lol at Nadine Dorries as the older lady
..