How Harry lost his virginity

[SnottyLottie]

Harry described losing his virginity as "a humiliating episode with an older lady".

He said it was "with an older lady, who loved horses very much and treated me like a young stallion".

The excerpt read: "'I mounted her quickly, after which she spanked my ass and held me back… one of my mistakes was letting it happen in a field, just behind a busy pub. No doubt someone had seen us'."

source: Sky News

well I don’t even know what to make of that 😬🤭😆🤣

Carry on up the Windsors -

I can imagine Babs W playing the arse spanker in her time.

Reminds me of the steamy books of my mums that I used to pinch and laugh at as a teen, How embarrassing.

Queenie will be spinning in her grave! Although H's revelations remind me of his dad's tampax comments!

Like a Barbara Cartland novel…

I can imagine Babs W playing the arse spanker in her time.

Hattie. All day long. 😉

I lost my DM last week so it's been a shit few days since, but this is one of the the first times I have genuinely laughed since it happened. A very heartfelt thank you for this comment as it has made me genuinely smile for the first time in days.

Is Tiggy Legg Burke into horses? I remember reading some speculation that she had ‘made a man’ of William, so maybe Harry had sloppy seconds…

I am struggling to believe this is real. Surely they must have read a draft before printing.

Anyway, nothing to do with Harry, but I read somewhere that the Rupert Campbell Black character in the Jilly Cooper books was loosely based on Andrew Parker Bowles.

Jesus fucking Christ. He needs help. Who allowed this????

God where is my eye bleach? Harry please for the love of god F off and shut up.

It's Katie Price isn't it......

Pleeeseeee let it be Katie Price!

@Luredbyapomegranate

Carry on Windsors
Big Willy
The Duke & Duchess of SusSEX
Oooh Meghan!

It practically writes itself

I haven’t laughed this much in ages. I’ve got tears steaming down my eyes. I’ll be so disappointed now if this isn’t real .

Is this the bloke that wanted privacy? 🤣🤣

I was going to say, was she Jilly Cooper?

I think even KP has some standards…

Oh dear this is nauseating…and also extremely sad.

Isn’t he narrating there kindle version himself? It’s bad enough putting it in a book, but reading this aloud…cringe.

😂 😂

@User787878787878 🌻

Have only read the first post. Holy lord.

If this is true

I wonder whether Harry is once again blaming someone else for this, his bad first sex experience. Some older woman made him do it behind a pub. Right. He has no agency and takes no responsibility. I don't suppose he gives two hoots about whether she enjoyed it.

I just had a look to see if any posdible / likely / speculative names are trending on Twitter. One stood out.

It’s….. Nadine Dorries