How Harry lost his virginity

[SnottyLottie]

Harry described losing his virginity as "a humiliating episode with an older lady".

He said it was "with an older lady, who loved horses very much and treated me like a young stallion".

The excerpt read: "'I mounted her quickly, after which she spanked my ass and held me back… one of my mistakes was letting it happen in a field, just behind a busy pub. No doubt someone had seen us'."

source: Sky News

well I don’t even know what to make of that 😬🤭😆🤣

I think it's a very bad translation because the newspapers were rushing to get the excerpts out before each other - some of them clearly had better translators than others on staff.

Some are clearly just using Google translate.

Prince Harry claims Camilla turned his bedroom into her dressing room.

“I tried not to care. But especially the first time I saw it, I cared,” the 38-year-old Duke of Sussex wrote.

I'll see if I can reserve this from the local library, laugh out loud!

If I am honest, it would make more sense IF it is a bad translation. At this point, it feels more plausible than him actually writing this shit.

It still has to be translated from something!

Someone is really going to regret all this in a few years when he looks back and realises how ridiculous he is being. There are a lot of threads about this perhaps they should all be bunged on one thread.

Dear Lord this man really is whoring himself out isn’t he 😕

I would say he is more like a My Little Pony than a stallion..

Also, for someone so vocal about his and his family’s security, I really question the wisdom (and morality) of numbering the Taliban members you believe you’ve killed.

I'll be reading it but I won't be buying a new copy as I don't want a single cent to go to H&M. I'll wait until there are copies in the charity shops, which won't be long.

I hope so as they supposedly paid JRMoehringer a $1M to ghost write the thing. He's a fairly decent writer based on his past work.

When he sez it was behind a pub, I think he means The Prince of Wales.
Easy mistake.

The book needs it’s own sub board with the Royal Family board at this rate 🤣

😁 maybe she was the older lady

Can’t find post but agree the whole Spanish translation leak thing is inspired

I

The original would have been pictures in crayon so I doubt you would have escaped it.

There… is no way this is real?! I’m on too many drugs getting over flu… this isn’t real? It sounds like Rooney and his older lady, crikey! To each their own but am right off my noodle soup, why did he need to tell anyone this :(

Wasn't it quite well known that maybe the lady might have perhaps been the late TPT?

Surely you can be locked up in the Tower for spanking a royal. That's quite a risk she took.

Oh Good Lord. The echo chamber this man lives in needs dismantling asap. I mean he must now realise what an absolute loon he is coming across as - if he doesn’t one of his highly prized therapists needs to spell it out. Stop, go into hiding and come back out when you’re ready to behave like an adult. His poor kids having to read this shite in however many years and just imagine when the other kids at school find out…..

I tried not to care. But especially the first time I saw it, I cared
Harry should be a standup comedian

Oh Harry Harry Harry. Most people have got over over sharing by the time they are 38 🙈it actually makes me feel sad and that he is an extremely lost and lonely individual.

This is one of those occasions where a ghost writer might be very glad of their anonymity

I wonder how you nominate authors for the Bad Sex Award, I know it is supposed to be for fiction, but I think they could stretch a point, since I bet more than 50% of this masterpiece is made up.

( Interesting but irrelevant fact: I actually know a previous winner, I used to babysit him when he was a sweet little tot.)

@ArcaneWireless 🤣

If I remember rightly, David Niven wrote about his first experience and he made it funny (The Moon’s A Balloon was a brilliant autobiography). I’ve got a feeling there is not one hint of humour with Harry’s anecdote.