Heartache after saying goodbye- support thread

[Helplessandheartbroke]

I'm in agony after losing our boy 2.5 weeks ago. I had another thread deleted as it was too outing but realised quickly there's many of us suffering. Anyone want to join hands?

We get her in April! I’m dreading it, yes she’s cute but she’s not my girl 💔😭☹️

Helplessandheartbroken, it might be worth contacting your GP if you are deeply struggling and having very bad nights. Grief can be very messy and take us to some strange places. I suspect this might happen more in unexpected deaths or when a death has been preceded by something that induces a traumatic response in those left behind.
Your lovely boy will only have known love and care from you and that will have made his life wonderful for him.

Ineedwinenow, If you feel it’s way too soon try and speak to your husband. people grieve in different ways at different speeds and need different things to help them. I doubt I will have another dog having spent the past three years caring for a dog with ever increasing health and mobility needs, but I might offer to have one for short periods of time or offer to take one for walks. TBH I cannot imagine another dog in my life at this point in time and that is okay.

I am sorry Helpless, I think my post may have triggered that thought re the vet. I think the advise to see the GP is a good one.

I know it is good to talk about sad events, but do you think it might be a good idea to step back from your thread for a few days. I know it is your thread, and it has been really supportive for so many. The reason I say this, is I posted a lot last week, but then came back to the thread and just couldn't cope with reading what I had posted again. And knowing how much sadness other people were dealing with. It made me even more sad and I felt I wasn't coping well. So I stepped away for a few days, and came back to the with a slightly different emotion. Of course I am still devastated, but I was able to start to process my grief that I needed to. Now I can be more open to responding to others without it triggering me as much. I am not sure if I have worded this well, but it is a very emotional thread and I get very heartsore each time I come to it.

Sending you a big hug from the other side of the world.

@Ineedwinenow

As much as your dh is trying to do what he thinks is right, you both need to be on the same page about a new puppy.

Please chat to him openly, it is a lot to digest.

@triballeader I'm on meds through gp. I suffer with ocd and general anxiety so losing ddog was a real trigger for my ocd. Thank you for responding. I think I just needed a vent last night.

@randgirl as above its my ocd that triggers me it wasn't your post lovely. This thread has been a life line for me and the support has honestly been more helpful than I could have imagined. Thank you for responding and giving me some food for thought.

@Ineedwinenow agree with the above defo speak to dh. I couldn't imagine another ddog any time soon tbh.

@CeciledeVolangesdeNouveau how are you today?

Does anyone want me to start a new thread? X

new thread? good idea.

My next door neighbour is a devoted dog person and has been very kind but most people I know seem to think making that choice for a beloved dog is only like ditching a half dead pot plant. For some having a virtual space may help.

@triballeader I'll set one up tonight and try and put the link on here...never done it before. Shall I put it in pets? I know a few on here lost cats and I want all to feel welcome. I agree some people not getting the loss of a fury friend and the grief that comes with it. I don't think I would have fully understood it until it happened to me. I knew the day would come and it would be awful but I wasn't prepared for how bad it would be. Hope you're ok x

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/the_doghouse/5022293-heartache-after-saying-goodbye-support-thread-2

Sending sympathy to all. The grief has left me breathless. The house is hollowl